Pesach when family is ALL home

debbilcsw

Fri, Mar 29 2019, 11:06 am

I am creating this forum in response to the informative and articulate posts concerning parenting, thank you for creating this awareness, guiding us to recognize that our children's feelings are real and that our role is not blaming or judging them for how they feel but rather attempting to listen, validate, deeply understand and emphasize. The next step for parents is maintaining open communication with our children, meaning really listening to them and being genuinely interested in their lives. Yes parents (including myself!), we need to actively listen. So many parents sit in my office and are often surprised to discover what has been replaying for years in their child's world. Now is a very busy and hectic time for many, yet it is ideal for us to use the time when parents and children are home together as an opportunity to listen and learn from each other with love, compassion, real understanding, and genuine acceptance. It was brought to my attention that Rabbi Forchheimer, Dr Shanik of Lakewood and other community leaders recorded Pesach messages encouraging parents to be in tune to the happenings in their children's lives especially during Yom Tov.
A Rav from Miami shared with me that because the Kedusha of Yom Tov and the potential for growth is so enormous, therefore to maintain equilibrium, Hashem gives us unique Nisyonos as well precisely during these times. Rav Gavriel Finkel ZT"L shared that avoiding anger and frustration at our family members during this season is an even greater Mitzvah than cleaning for a Mashehu of Chometz. Our spouses, children, families, neighbors both Jewish and non-Jewish are watching us now, and let us display positivity, extra courtesy, and true Simcha as we embrace the Yom Tov of real freedom.

A Licensed Clinical Marriage and Family Therapist