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4 yr old boundaries- he’s taking all our stuff



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solo




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 07 2019, 8:47 am
My 4.5 yr old ds understands personal property. He has a special drawer for his prized possessions. And a hook for his knapsack. He knows it’s nice to share but he doesn’t always have to...
he takes everyone else’s things. Sometimes in a shameless public way. And sometimes sneakily.
This morning my daughters knapsack was left overturned. All her homework was thrown about and destroyed. Her special snack for the bus was eaten. (I suspect 4yr old was after the candy but left the homework accessible to 2 yr old dad)
Yesterday eve while everyone was getting ready for bed he opened his older brothers special drawer played with the toys and unwrapped and used up some one time use items.
So basically he has no respect for personal property. And it really (understandably) upsets his 6&8 yr old siblings. He’s my biggest child so there’s no way they can make their things inaccessible to him.
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amother
Slateblue


 

Post Sun, Apr 07 2019, 8:51 am
id set up consequences in advance with him and enforce them -- calmly and consistently
and a positive reinforcement sticker chart
he is just doing what he wants and old enough to learn whats acceptable
he may be doing it to get a reaction from his older sibs deliberately or not
he may just want the older kids stuff and can learn he can want but not have
I would address the behavior and do everything to nip it in the bud
id also consider getting the older kids some way to have a private area ( a lock box? with a hidden key?) he can't get into - while it won't totally solve the problem it could help them feel validated and empowered
hatzlocha
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 07 2019, 8:57 am
So just keep teaching him not to. He’s only four years old. 4 year olds touch things, and break things and spill things and scribble on things. It’s called being a 4 year old.
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