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The evening is so hard
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:23 pm
I’m pregnant right now and have 3 young kids. I find the late afternoon through bedtime to be so difficult. My kids want to eat all afternoon from when they come home. They only like dinner if it’s mac n cheese or the like so if I make nutritious food for dh and I they aren’t happy. And they end up bickering a bunch. I’m alone and dinner bath and bedtime are so overwhelming. Any advice?
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honeymoon




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:30 pm
First of all, you are in good company.

Some ideas:
Bathe the little one in the morning so there is one less kid to bathe at night.

Go outside or to the park for an hour. The afternoon passes quicker and the kids have a great time while mom enjoys the fresh air.

Serve dinner as soon as the kids come home while they are still hungry. Whatever they eat after that is fine once they ate a healthy meal.

Sitting them down to watch an Uncle Moishy video here and there wont hurt, and it will give you some calm time for yourself.

Most of all, make sure to take care of yourself as a depleted mom is a defeated mom!
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amother
Vermilion


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:31 pm
dont bathe every night when you are pregnant
I also make noodles and fish sticks for my kids when pg when I have no energy to fight with them
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daagahminayin




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:34 pm
No advice but I was thinking of writing a similar post today, just wondering if other people also found the after-school to bedtime marathon exhausting. But I was too tired! If you’re pregnant it’s even harder!

Ok thought of something: My advice is to bring snacks with you when you pick them up from school. If you give them fruit or veg they may be more likely to eat it since there is nothing else.

I have sometimes hired babysitters or mother’s helpers just for those few hours to help me out.

You could try making your own orange vegetable purée and sneaking it into the mac & cheese. Or just accept that at the moment the most important thing is that they are fed and you can work on introducing a more healthy diet at a less stressful time in your life.

If your kids are old enough to help with simple chores ask them to tidy up and clear their plates. I sometimes do a points system to reward them, or write mitzvah notes.

Don’t tell but I also put my preschooler in “next day’s clothes” instead of pyjamas to save time in the morning.

You could also give baths to the kids every other night on a schedule so you don’t do them all each night.

B’hatzlacha! Thinking of you, it’s not easy! And b’sha’ah tova!
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:35 pm
I don't bathe every night. It's way too hard and time consuming.
Have supper ready the minute the last one walks in the door. When I have supper ready early my entire night is easier.
If that's not an option, cut up fruit or veggies for them to nosh on. My kids are really picky so I make sure to always have a fruit they like in the house.
I sometimes give a snack before bedtime since they ate supper early.
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amother
Lime


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:40 pm
I have a hell of a time getting them to fall asleep... hours every night...
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:44 pm
amother [ Lime ] wrote:
I have a hell of a time getting them to fall asleep... hours every night...


Can u put them in their beds and have them.listen to a CD? That's what I did when I was pregnant.

Can u start a sticker chart with a prize when they get a certain amount of days of going to bed nicely?

My kids can also take hours and I need to lay near them. It's really hard.

ETA- if my kids are laying for longer than like 45 minutes I know they aren't tired enough and sometimes allow them to look at a book or listen to something. Generally it takes me 20 minutes to half hour to get three kids to bed.
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amother
Lawngreen


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:48 pm
If it takes hours for a kid to fall asleep, perhaps they need a later bedtime. It's also important to wind down before bed.
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amother
Cyan


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:49 pm
Unless they are dirty / have accidents no reason to give baths daily, especially while pregnant!! I do aprox 3 times a week all year besides the summer.

When I’m pregnant we also eat a lot of mac n cheese & frozen pizza. My husband takes care of himself- sardines, tuna, shabbos leftovers etc.

My priority is to stay sane. Priority needs to be to take care of mom, so mom can take care of kids plus unborn baby.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 8:51 pm
Thank you! Only my oldest is in full day preschool but he’s home by 3:45, isn’t that too early for dinner? I do give snacks but they keep asking for more. We should go outside but everyone is tired and cranky for that. But I could try to push. I do baths every other night. I’m fine with kid food but I’m exhausted to make 2 dinners and I want to try to eat healthy. I ended up warming up leftovers for them tonight. Oh and I do put on tv probably too much Sad

They do go to sleep late and it’s a struggle to go to sleep so we all kind of dread bedtime a little I think.

They are good kids and I’m usually a good mom just want to say.
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 9:01 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thank you! Only my oldest is in full day preschool but he’s home by 3:45, isn’t that too early for dinner? I do give snacks but they keep asking for more. We should go outside but everyone is tired and cranky for that. But I could try to push. I do baths every other night. I’m fine with kid food but I’m exhausted to make 2 dinners and I want to try to eat healthy. I ended up warming up leftovers for them tonight. Oh and I do put on tv probably too much Sad

They do go to sleep late and it’s a struggle to go to sleep so we all kind of dread bedtime a little I think.

They are good kids and I’m usually a good mom just want to say.


If they are hungry. Give them dinner at 3:45 and give a healthy snack later on before bed.
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ectomorph




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 9:07 pm
I do dinner at 4. Bath or video or outside time at 430. 530 snack. 600 bedtime.

If that doesn't work, move around the times

Ie more outside time

If you have space outside I suggest you pay a few hundred dollars to gate it in so that your children can play outside with minimal supervision
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 9:17 pm
ectomorph wrote:
I do dinner at 4. Bath or video or outside time at 430. 530 snack. 600 bedtime.

If that doesn't work, move around the times

Ie more outside time

If you have space outside I suggest you pay a few hundred dollars to gate it in so that your children can play outside with minimal supervision


My kids go to bed quite a bit later. It’s fully gated but I still would have to go out they’re young. Thanks though.
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 9:18 pm
Do a much earlier bedtime so they aren’t overtired. When they are overtired children have a harder time calming down to sleep. Also the constant eating is prob from being tired. When my kids were little they had baths at 4, dinner at 5 followed by relaxed playtime and reading bedtime books and in bed by 630. We did this for all kids up to around age 7 then slowly extended bedtime.

I know you’re pregnant and exhausted but I would suggest doing bath every night just to maintain an identical routine every day. Also it’s an activity! Let it be fun and by starting early you have more time and don’t feel rushed, let them play in the bath.

Also, make dinner in the morning or prep so all you have to do is put in oven later. I will even put a pot with water and the steamer basket inside and place it in stove. Then when I come home I know all I have to do is turn on the burner Nd a few minutes later throw in the frozen broccoli. Anything to save time when the kids are cranky and tired and hungry
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 9:25 pm
amother [ Jetblack ] wrote:
Do a much earlier bedtime so they aren’t overtired. When they are overtired children have a harder time calming down to sleep. Also the constant eating is prob from being tired. When my kids were little they had baths at 4, dinner at 5 followed by relaxed playtime and reading bedtime books and in bed by 630. We did this for all kids up to around age 7 then slowly extended bedtime.

I know you’re pregnant and exhausted but I would suggest doing bath every night just to maintain an identical routine every day. Also it’s an activity! Let it be fun and by starting early you have more time and don’t feel rushed, let them play in the bath.

Also, make dinner in the morning or prep so all you have to do is put in oven later. I will even put a pot with water and the steamer basket inside and place it in stove. Then when I come home I know all I have to do is turn on the burner Nd a few minutes later throw in the frozen broccoli. Anything to save time when the kids are cranky and tired and hungry


I like that idea but don’t your kids get dirty at dinner? I’m talking about preschool and toddlers.
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oneofakind




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 9:29 pm
Earlier bed time gives you a break and makes for happier children. It's worth working on it.
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 9:38 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I like that idea but don’t your kids get dirty at dinner? I’m talking about preschool and toddlers.


Yes, pjs were definitely only used once before washing (sooo much laundry by totally worth it), sometimes I had to change them again before bed but usually it’s just cleaning their face and hands (put hair up in pony)

Like a PP said, early bedtimes are really worth working for. If you can get your kids to bed by 630 not only will they feel better and eventually fall asleep faster, you have a good amount of time to take care of yourself or whatever else needs to get done!
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amother
Cerulean


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 9:39 pm
I hear you Mama! I'm also expecting with 3 kids. It's hard.
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amother
Slateblue


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 10:09 pm
For those saying you put your kids to bed at 6:00-6:30 what time do your kids wake up in the morning. As a mom of young kids who only start preschool at 9:30 I see no reason for kids to wake up at 6:00 unlessyour a working mom and your doc gi early to daycare
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Tue, Apr 30 2019, 10:12 pm
amother [ Slateblue ] wrote:
For those saying you put your kids to bed at 6:00-6:30 what time do your kids wake up in the morning. As a mom of young kids who only start preschool at 9:30 I see no reason for kids to wake up at 6:00 unlessyour a working mom and your doc gi early to daycare


I put all three of my kids (7 and under) to bed starting 6:45-7:15. They don't always fall asleep right away. They get up at about 7.
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