When do you set your shabbes table?

DVOM

Thu, May 09 2019, 8:49 am

My husband and I set the table together after he comes home from shul on Friday night. I never knew it was a 'thing' to have it set earlier. Can someone explain it to me?

pause

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:03 am

I cook everything except potato kugel on Thursday. I usually set my table Thursday night, but if I don't get to it, Friday morning. My dining room table also gets used for work and so sometimes I spend Thursday night clearing it and Friday morning setting it. Smile

My kids polish the silver and prepare cutlery/napkins on Friday to the best of their ability. I don't see tarnish though I do notice how gold my candlesticks are LOL

. I'm ok with it because it allows me to be calm Friday afternoon and not slide breathlessly into Shabbos.

pause

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:05 am

DVOM wrote:

My husband and I set the table together after he comes home from shul on Friday night. I never knew it was a 'thing' to have it set earlier. Can someone explain it to me?

Tablecloth and muktza items (candlesticks, pushka) are a must. Cutlery, napkins, and stemware (or simple glasses, if you're like me Wink

) can be done on Shabbos itself.

lfab

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:24 am

When we used to have only one table for everything I would put the tablecloth on right before I lit candles, and then set the table while my husband was in shul. Now that we B"H have an eat in kitchen I have my 2 oldest set the table on Friday afternoon.

Notsobusy

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:29 am

Squishy wrote:

I was beginning to think that I am the only one without a dedicated Shabbos table. My dining room is used for homework, cozy reading on the couches, laundry sorting and folding, DH's paper work, my crafting.

My dining room table is also my everything table and my kids are usually using it Friday afternoon. I'd rather set it after l light candles and let them do their art projects or puzzles all afternoon on Friday. I start nudging them to clear it off about an hour before Shabbos.

watergirl

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:37 am

pause wrote:

Tablecloth and muktza items (candlesticks, pushka) are a must. Cutlery, napkins, and stemware (or simple glasses, if you're like me Wink

) can be done on Shabbos itself.

Why are there candlesticks and a pushka on the dining room table for shabbos? None of that goes on my shabbos table and I've never seen anyone else with it on their shabbos tables either.

Chayalle

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:44 am

DVOM wrote:

My husband and I set the table together after he comes home from shul on Friday night. I never knew it was a 'thing' to have it set earlier. Can someone explain it to me?

I had a high school teacher/Rebetzin (perhaps the only hs teacher I had a relationship with) who told us to always set our Shabbos tables early - preferably by Thursday night. She said it will usher an aura of peace in, because every time you see the set table you absorb that Shabbos is coming.

I do this in her memory - I always set my table by Thursday night. In the winter I even set it on Wednesday night, because I cook/clean on Thursday night, and setting the table is one job that I can move up and take off my list.

Just like she said, I feel a certain sense of peace when my table is set for Shabbos.

Chayalle

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:47 am

watergirl wrote:

Why are there candlesticks and a pushka on the dining room table for shabbos? None of that goes on my shabbos table and I've never seen anyone else with it on their shabbos tables either.

I've seen people who put the candles on the table. I don't use plastic, so I don't put my candles/pushka on the table, or I wouldn't be able to change the tablecloth if necessary.

watergirl

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:53 am

Chayalle wrote:

I've seen people who put the candles on the table. I don't use plastic, so I don't put my candles/pushka on the table, or I wouldn't be able to change the tablecloth if necessary.

For those who put these on their tables, how do they change the cloth if they need to? I also dont use plastic. My kids rip the cheap thin plastic and I hate how it flies up, and I hate the thick plastic (it gets so gross!). And my kids are little, I can just see the candlesticks getting knocked - we use oil/water, so it makes a big mess when that happens).

I'm just noting that I've never heard of putting a pushka on the table, and I've seen people put candlesticks in non frum kids shabbat books but I've literally never seen this in action. Not at all saying that I dont think its ok, CVS!

Last edited by watergirl on Thu, May 09 2019, 9:56 am; edited 2 times in total

watergirl

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:55 am

amother [ Navy ] wrote:

Many many people have their candelabra on the dining room table. Not everyone has a buffet.

I didn't always have a buffet. When I didn't, we put in really beautiful frosted glass floating shelves into the wall (yes, this was a rental), and we put the candles and stuff on there. It was perfect.

Chayalle

Thu, May 09 2019, 9:58 am

watergirl wrote:

I remember once seeing someone use two tablecloths, sort of meeing up halfway around the candlesticks. Not my style at all, but whatever works for whoever....the rest of people I've seen use plastic if they have candlesticks on the table.

Or the newest thing I've seen is faux leather tablecloths, which can be wiped down. Or other types of pre-treated fabrics that don't absorb spills....

avi

Thu, May 09 2019, 10:02 am

I work full time and therefor have everything done Thursday night. I Cook everything and set the table. I lacquered my candle sticks and tray years ago so it never tarnishes and the rest of the silver my husband puts out Friday afternoon. Love going to work Friday morning with table set all nice and house all clean.
Also yes I keep my candles and tzedakah box on the table. My kids were trained never to touch and thank gd never had any issues. I don’t use a plastic and I wipe off the crumbs after each meal. My kids each get a white cloth placemats under their plates which I change
Each do what works best for them

amother

Sienna

Thu, May 09 2019, 10:04 am

watergirl wrote:

I guess I'm the only one who works on Fridays

Not at all.
Our dining table was for many years also our main worktable. Many nonfood things lived there during the week. Needless to say the table wasn’t set till after licht.
Now our computer has a permanent home elsewhere and the dining table is used less often for non food purposes. I **could** set the table Thursday night, and sometimes do if it’s a short Friday with company expected, but I don’t really see the point otherwise. There are many other Shabbos prep tasks that can’t be done after licht that are more important to do Thursday night, like... cook, clean the house, that sort of thing that’s just a teeny bit higher on the priority list. Nothing wrong with setting the table after licht. I don’t have candles on the table so I don’t have the halachic problem of moving it because it’s a base for something muktze.

Lydia

Thu, May 09 2019, 10:55 am

To change the plastic tablecloth when there are leichter on it: Put down two plastic tablecloths before Shabbos. Then put on the leichter. Cut a circle in the top layer of tablecloth around where the leichter are sitting. Then after the night seuda, you can roll up the top layer and lift it up over the leichter. You have a fresh plastic layer for the daytime seuda.

amother

Brunette

Thu, May 09 2019, 11:34 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I usually set my shabbes table Thursday morning . I put the white table clothes. Candles and silverware. Cutlery and napkins I do Thursday evening or Friday .
This morning (Thursday) dh came down and asked "what day is it ? Why is the table set?"
Told him for the last few months/year I do it Thursday morning .
My kitchen table we still use so I put white tablecloth Friday after breakfast .

I also do most of the shabbes cooking on Thursday.

I envy you. It is and was always my hope that one day I'll do the same.