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Moral dilemma. Advise plz
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crystal




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 8:17 pm
amother [ Floralwhite ] wrote:
Your aunt is relatively young. Tell her that they have oral pills for chemo with fewer side effects than the port with the IV. Ask her to maybe try the chemo pills first before making a decision to just abandon ship.

I disagree with all the posters above who say that chemo has terrible side effects. There are newer forms of treatment with fewer side effects. Your aunt will never know what her options are if she doesn't inquire.


May you never know more about this, but there are over 50 types of chemo, different ones work for different cancers so it's not exactly like you say just ask her to get the pills type etc.

OP, I'm of the opinion to let her live her last few years the way she's most comfortable, but I do like the idea a previous poster mentioned, maybe you can accompany her to the doctor and ask pointed questions, she may hear it more clearly. Either way, respect her wishes. May she have a Refuah shleima!
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trixx




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 8:51 pm
ShishKabob wrote:
I think this is a pure halachic question. It's not her body, her choice. I don't think that's jewish. We can't just watch someone commit suicide and think that it's their body their choice. We can't just allow someone to overdose on drugs because it's their body their choice. Just like you won't let your good friend guzzle soda all day and night drinking like 120 oz of soda a day because it's their body, their choice, and you'd be scared to voice your opinion about how unhealthy it is.
No, we have to do the right thing even if the other person will be upset or angry at us.
I'm not saying that in this case it's considered suicide, but I think the mindset from many posters is like that. And I'm not even saying this is the case with a 70 year old women.
I am saying that I think a competent Rabbi has to be consulted as to how to go about this.
B'hatzlocha


Actually, I believe in general the problem is once intervention is started (like life support) then you can't go off it. But you don't have to start it to begin with.
If you're going to bring in the halachic aspect it's very detailed and very much dependent on each case.
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Geulanow




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 9:16 pm
Do a search online "cancer without chemo". Some cancers, such as breast, do not recommend chemo anymore. Refuah shlaima.
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dankbar




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 9:20 pm
the newer type of chemo has no hair loss or nausea. There are also plenty of anti nausea meds available today. There are also different type of treatment options today
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andrea levy




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 9:20 pm
to me, this is not a moral dilemma.she has every right to decide what works best for her and will give her the quality of life she wants for the longest time. a good palliative care physician can help mitigate discomfort and arrange for support as needed. im sorry for her illness. I hope her process is peaceful.
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andrea levy




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 9:22 pm
trixx wrote:
Actually, I believe in general the problem is once intervention is started (like life support) then you can't go off it. But you don't have to start it to begin with.
If you're going to bring in the halachic aspect it's very detailed and very much dependent on each case.


This. And it is not a question for your average Rabbi, either.
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dankbar




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 9:25 pm
today a cancer diagnosis is not a death sentence like once upon a time. I know more survivors than losses bh
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amother




Mustard


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 10:07 pm
dankbar wrote:
today a cancer diagnosis is not a death sentence like once upon a time. I know more survivors than losses bh


Different forms of cancer have different prognosis.
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JoyInTheMorning




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 10:28 pm
I'm not any kind of medical professional. But I know enough from friends to know that chemo is usually no walk in the park. The standard arsenal of drugs, which is usually part of the cocktail that is given to maximize cure, does have all the terrible side effects that we know of. Often the protocol depends on the stage. We have no way of knowing what is going on here. (BTW, Geulanow, regarding breast cancer: chemo often isn't part of the protocol if the cancer is at an early stage and hasn't spread to the lymph nodes. That's also true of other cancers that are caught early. But if it's at a later stage, chemo is given.)

I agree that it's useful to get more information. But it would be cruel to urge your aunt into chemo by telling her that chemo isn't hard. It is.
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amother




Azure


Post  Mon, Jun 03 2019, 10:39 pm
It looks like she decided that she rather end her life with no more suffering that she already have. She is alone and there is nobody that is depended on her. You can ask a rabbi if you have the obligation to push her for chemo. Otherwise I understand her decision actually. Why would she burden other people who are not close to her and prolong a life of suffering and make it worse than it is already.
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