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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Preschoolers
Bedtime for 5 yo



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amother
OP


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 8:03 pm
What's a good bedtime for a 5 yo? Lately he's been up until 8 or 9. He used to go sleep at 6, and when we changed the clock, 7.
If he stays up late am I obligated to entertain him? It's quite frustrating!!
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behappy2




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 8:06 pm
6:00-7:00 I think is typical

My almost 9 year old goes to bed at 8:00
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pesek zman




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 8:35 pm
What time does he have to be up? Aim for 12 hours earlier
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 8:41 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
What's a good bedtime for a 5 yo? Lately he's been up until 8 or 9. He used to go sleep at 6, and when we changed the clock, 7.
If he stays up late am I obligated to entertain him? It's quite frustrating!!


NO, you are not obligated to entertain him. Bedtime should be a firm 7pm, but with the option to read picture books, or play quietly with a couple of toys. Very soft music is also an option.

Getting up 100 times a night is not acceptable. Make a ritual, and let him know that he needs a sip of water and one last trip to the bathroom before bed.

5 is a great age for testing authority, so don't be surprised if your sweet child suddenly decides to attack you on all fronts. What he's looking for right now, is to know that you will stand firm. He may hate boundaries, but he's actually craving them. It's a phase, and it will come and go. Consider it a preview for puberty. Wink
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amother
OP


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 10:03 pm
He needs to be up by 7:30-8, but I wake up at 7 so I'm happy if he does too.

Right now he goes to sleep at 8 (closer to 8 than 9 usually), wakes up before me - probably at 6:30, 6:45, and plays in his room until I wake up.
He does not nap during the day.

Twice a week he will fall asleep at 6 or 7 but the rest of he week he's up later and likes to hang out with me downstairs. I've been telling him, "I'm sorry sweetie, it's mommy time now, I can't read you a story but you're welcome to sit/sleep on the couch/play on your own."
I was wondering if that was rude and wrong of me.
He just turned 5; he's my oldest.
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amother
Seagreen


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 10:05 pm
You don't need to make it about you and your time. Decide on a bedtime and stick with it, and make it about bedtime. Bedtime means he stays in his bed. It's healthier for people to have a consistent sleep schedule vs fluctuations of a couple of hours throughout the week.
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amother
Pink


 

Post Thu, Jun 27 2019, 1:22 am
If it only started during summer vacation, maybe let him have a little bit of leeway, but make it clear that this is a vacation schedule.
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amother
Lime


 

Post Thu, Jun 27 2019, 7:38 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
What's a good bedtime for a 5 yo? Lately he's been up until 8 or 9. He used to go sleep at 6, and when we changed the clock, 7.
If he stays up late am I obligated to entertain him? It's quite frustrating!!


Sounds like my life. 8-9 on weekdays. Later on Shabbos. He gets up anywhere between 6-7:30. Entertaining all the time, but he's an only child. Definitely enforce an earlier bedtime if you want to, but don't worry that anything is wrong with the schedule if he seems well rested.
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Rachel Shira




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 27 2019, 7:46 am
Do you have blackout curtains in his room? It might be too light for him to wind down and fall asleep. Otherwise no, you do not need to entertain him. I would have him stay in his room after whatever time bedtime is, and let him read a book or some other quiet activity until he’s tired.
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Thu, Jun 27 2019, 7:01 pm
If he's up everyday between 6:30 and 7 am that means he doesn't need more sleep!
Unless he's acting tired during the day, maybe he doesn't need more than 11 hours of sleep!
I know it's an adjustment when your oldest child needs a later bedtime because you have less time for yourself but his bedtime shouldn't depends on that!
It's a very good idea for him to entertain himself , don't feel guilty at all!
Tell him a certain time ( let's say 7 if you want him to sleep at 8) when he can only play quiet games or read.
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Ma3




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 27 2019, 9:42 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
He needs to be up by 7:30-8, but I wake up at 7 so I'm happy if he does too.

Right now he goes to sleep at 8 (closer to 8 than 9 usually), wakes up before me - probably at 6:30, 6:45, and plays in his room until I wake up.
He does not nap during the day.

Twice a week he will fall asleep at 6 or 7 but the rest of he week he's up later and likes to hang out with me downstairs. I've been telling him, "I'm sorry sweetie, it's mommy time now, I can't read you a story but you're welcome to sit/sleep on the couch/play on your own."
I was wondering if that was rude and wrong of me.
He just turned 5; he's my oldest.


Why would you allow him to stay on couch? He'll keep coming out if he knows he doesn't REALLY need to go to sleep..
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amother
Mint


 

Post Thu, Jun 27 2019, 9:44 pm
I find it really depends on their nature. My almost 5 year old has been sleeping only 9-10 hours per 24 hours since he is one. No matter what I do, blackout shades etc, he is done sleeping after 9-10 hours. Sometimes less.
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Zehava




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 27 2019, 9:53 pm
I let my kids entertain themselves in their room with just a small light on until they fall asleep. They only have books there and no toys, and I like that it gives them great reading practice while helping them wind down.
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