Extra Active Toddler

amother

Tue, Jul 09 2019, 4:45 am

Subject line sais it all.
I have an extra active toddler. He is extremely quick and smart b'h.
But.... Thats where all my energy goes.
He is also extremely stubborn and that brings to quite alot of tantruming.
Could you please advice me good parenting books that help with active, stubborn toddlers.
Also wouldnt mind any audio classes that come in short classes (15-1/2 hr a lesson)
Tank you all.

amother

Rose

Tue, Jul 09 2019, 5:30 am

I don't really have any good advice, only some sympathetic hugs.
I also have an overactive toddler and I know what it feels like. It seems like I only have to blink for her to cause trouble.
When she tantrums, I usually just ignore her. I'll just repeat, when she's a bit calmer 'no grapes now. grapes later' or whatever it is that's set her off. You have to be firm and consistent. When I'm not sure, should I allow it or not, she knows that. Once you've decided, ok, she's not getting/doing this now, that's it, don't give in.
I also find distractions work great, if I know she's going to play up, I'll try to catch her before she tantrums, eg: 'look, birdie outside', get her running to climb up the windowsill and bang on the window, and then she's forgotten all about the grapes whilst I try to get her back down again, before she throws something else out the window Smile

...

SuperWify

Tue, Jul 09 2019, 9:26 am

My son is exactly like that. His EI therapist was great for teaching him to listen in specific areas. She said to pick one area (ie clean up toys or throw out wrappers) and never give in on that. If he won’t do it use hand over hand and be consistent.

It is possible your child can benefit from OT to help calm down and regulate himself.

mha3484

Tue, Jul 09 2019, 10:40 am

I have kids like that. We LIVE outside. One was a runner so the park that was closed in was our happy place. I have other kids that dont run off but behave 1000x times better when they get a lot of outside time.

trixx

Tue, Jul 09 2019, 12:09 pm

Make sure to wear him out in the morning if he's not in camp, go to playground or swimming etc. If in camp then take him straight out after a snack.
Also read How to Talk so Little Kids will Listen and Positive Discipline re tantrums for how to speak to kid.

jfk92

Tue, Jul 09 2019, 12:15 pm

Im on the side of wearing him out. Parks and swimming are excellent. But some sensory ideas may be great too. I had a cousin who was very active even at a younge age and some brushing (in addition to sport) really helped him calm down. I believe they did it after bath time.

amother

Fuchsia

Tue, Jul 09 2019, 12:34 pm

Raising a sensory smart child (book). It really gives insight into what's driving different behaviors, and how to fill their needs in more constructive, functional ways.

Rappel

Tue, Jul 09 2019, 12:39 pm

I love the book "why kids lie," and "how to talk so kids will listen." Even though they're mostly geared for older kids, I was able to draw from them in order to connect to my toddler.

As everyone else said -- the outdoors is your friend. There are many days when I pick up my son from mishpachton, and we don't make it home until sunset. I'm calmer when he's not tossing the house around, and so is he. We run it all off.

amother

Tue, Jul 09 2019, 1:33 pm

Thank you all for your quick replies.
I am outdoor alot, but he gets restless after half an hour. Most days we go park hoping for 2 hours.
He is not yet 2.
Yesterday I found him on my kitchen counter, unpacking my dishes from the cupboard.
Wearing him out helps he should fall asleep quickly but after 6 hours of sleep he is up and rested, ready to start his day. It's a whole struggle putting him back to sleep. His Playgroup teacher also told me, while all the kids nap an hour he naps for 20 minutes.
He is extremely curious.