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A little respect, maybe?

 
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Rappel




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:16 am
I'm tired today. I'm sure tomorrow will be better. But meanwhile, I just want to get this off my chest:

Could my son, just for once, maybe, in a blue moon, listen to an instruction without first stopping to question/challenge/propose an alternate option???

He's 3, and he's sweet, and a little mischievous. He's energetic, stubborn, caring, and can be extremely hyper/off kilter at times. He's overall reasonable, once something has been explained extensively. He has excellent 3 year-old hearing: that is to say, that once he focuses on a task, he completely tunes you out.

I am so proud and happy that he is inquisitive, interactive, and that he's not afraid of us.

But on days like today, I wish he had a little respect, and just LISTENED for once! Just ask the question WHILE you're already doing what I asked you to do!

Gaaaahhhhh!
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amother




Pearl


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:26 am
Oh my can I relate! Except mine is turning 10 and still doing that TMI However, it's been serving him really well in learning, so there's that....
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chanatron1000




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:55 am
At 3, they don't yet know that they are capable of hurting you.
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ShishKabob




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:56 am
chanatron1000 wrote:
At 3, they don't yet know that they are capable of hurting you.

They sure do, maybe they don't know the extent of it but they know that it affects you negatively.
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chanatron1000




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:03 am
ShishKabob wrote:
They sure do, maybe they don't know the extent of it but they know that it affects you negatively.

They know that they react negatively, but they still don't think of adults as vulnerable people.
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cinnamon




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:09 am
"You will now do xyz and I'll explain why when your done" rinse and repeat.
It's a work in progress with all my kids (ages 2.5 - 11) but works eventually.




.
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ShishKabob




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:12 am
chanatron1000 wrote:
They know that they react negatively, but they still don't think of adults as vulnerable people.

True
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amother




Hotpink


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:15 am
My almost three year old does that too! I could go crazy!!
Also, many times she just answers back. Like "come here, let me dress you" She: "no, you come here and I'll dress you!" She thinks it's funny. I don't know what to say...

And they sure know they can hurt you! When she hurts me, I pretend cry, since she's very little. She comes to give me a kiss.
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amother




Violet


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:19 am
Hi op! I’ve been through the same thing! My now four year old is exactly the same! I’ve stared incorporating aspects of gentle parenting and the difference is huge! It’s not magic, but I feel so much calmer and my kids do too. In a nutshell I would say it’s respecting your kids as people. Not trying to control them. If u have Instagram, check out blimie heller (unconditional parenting) she is amazing!
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Rappel




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:42 am
Pearl - that will be a comfort someday. But I feel guilty now at how relieved I am when I can put him in mishpachton, and not have to be firing on all pistons, constantly!

Cinnamon - how many years for it take to stick? I would kill for some sanity, but we are definitely at the stage of "Oh, you have a rule? Let me test it!" Every. Single. Time. I can be completely consistent for 99 times, and he'll still try his luck on the 100th.

Hot pink - that's adorable! I remember the first time my son said "No, I'mma, I'm going to change YOUR diaper," it caught me by surprise , until I considered that that was a 2 year old's version of a joke - turning reality upside down, on its head. So then we would just laugh together.


Violet - I am DEFINITELY going to Google her! I need some new tools to keep up with the mad hatter days.
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amother




Violet


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:47 am
[quote="Violet - I am DEFINITELY going to Google her! I need some new tools to keep up with the mad hatter days.[/quote]

I totally understand that feeling. Check her out. Blimie actually has a parenting course (I took it online) and it was a huge mind shift! She shows you how to look at parenting from a whole different perspective. It really spoke to me and has been life changing for me personally.
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amother




Cerulean


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 12:28 pm
Rappel wrote:
I'm tired today. I'm sure tomorrow will be better. But meanwhile, I just want to get this off my chest:

Could my son, just for once, maybe, in a blue moon, listen to an instruction without first stopping to question/challenge/propose an alternate option???

He's 3, and he's sweet, and a little mischievous. He's energetic, stubborn, caring, and can be extremely hyper/off kilter at times. He's overall reasonable, once something has been explained extensively. He has excellent 3 year-old hearing: that is to say, that once he focuses on a task, he completely tunes you out.

I am so proud and happy that he is inquisitive, interactive, and that he's not afraid of us.

But on days like today, I wish he had a little respect, and just LISTENED for once! Just ask the question WHILE you're already doing what I asked you to do!

Gaaaahhhhh!


He’s 3. I think ur not being realistic. Or fair.
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yerushamama




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 12:46 pm
amother [ Cerulean ] wrote:
He’s 3. I think ur not being realistic. Or fair.


No, she is being a normal, frustrated mother of a normal 3 year old - hoping that someone has ideas on how to make things easier!

Rappel, they do outgrow it - eventually (hopefully by the time they get married... Very Happy ). Don't feel guilty about enjoying sending him to mishpachton - at his age they really do need time with other kids. Just take a deep breath and get used to saying various versions of "because I said so". Like my mother always says when my kids act out "I just HATE when they act age appropriate!"
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Rappel




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 1:12 pm
yerushamama wrote:
No, she is being a normal, frustrated mother of a normal 3 year old - hoping that someone has ideas on how to make things easier!

Rappel, they do outgrow it - eventually (hopefully by the time they get married... Very Happy ). Don't feel guilty about enjoying sending him to mishpachton - at his age they really do need time with other kids. Just take a deep breath and get used to saying various versions of "because I said so". Like my mother always says when my kids act out "I just HATE when they act age appropriate!"


LOL

Thank you for your sympathy, and your mother's comedy. You hit the nail on the head!
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Laiya




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 1:50 pm
Rappel wrote:
Pearl - that will be a comfort someday. But I feel guilty now at how relieved I am when I can put him in mishpachton, and not have to be firing on all pistons, constantly!

Cinnamon - how many years for it take to stick? I would kill for some sanity, but we are definitely at the stage of "Oh, you have a rule? Let me test it!" Every. Single. Time. I can be completely consistent for 99 times, and he'll still try his luck on the 100th.

Hot pink - that's adorable! I remember the first time my son said "No, I'mma, I'm going to change YOUR diaper," it caught me by surprise , until I considered that that was a 2 year old's version of a joke - turning reality upside down, on its head. So then we would just laugh together.


Violet - I am DEFINITELY going to Google her! I need some new tools to keep up with the mad hatter days.


He sounds like a threenager Very Happy

I"h one day his confidence, energy and creativity will serve him well.
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