Home

My daughter was dropped off alone
  Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9  Next  Last >>
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Parenting our children -> Preschoolers

View latest: 24h 48h 72h


Dandelion1




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 9:27 pm
This is NOT about op. If she is chronically late at the busstop, then the camp should reserve the right to refuse to let the child ride the bus.

But leave a baby alone on the street?? That will "teach" the mother to be on time?

I can't believe I actually read that. Or that the bus did that.
Back to top

mommy3b2c




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 9:31 pm
Dandelion1 wrote:
This is NOT about op. If she is chronically late at the busstop, then the camp should reserve the right to refuse to let the child ride the bus.

But leave a baby alone on the street?? That will "teach" the mother to be on time?

I can't believe I actually read that. Or that the bus did that.


This.

I can’t believe how many people are missing the point. A baby was left alone in the street!!!!

The bus driver should be fired and charged with negligence and endangerment of a child.
Back to top

amother




Cyan


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 9:33 pm
chatz wrote:
I love how people are turning this into blaming the op.

Dropping off a 3 year old with no adult present is just plain wrong, absolutely negligent, and most probably illegal.

The driver should have brought back the child to camp.


I agree wholeheartedly! He was early. His issue. She’s not obligated to stand in this heat more than 5 minutes before the time. Most drivers will stop and honk for 5 seconds if ur not there before the time. HOWEVER, Even if she were not there it’s the drivers obligation to return her to daycamp. Otherwise he’s criminally liable if anything happens to the child. My children’s school sends papers home asking parents to sign permission allowing children off the bus if parent isn’t there. And when my daughter was too young to get off herself I didn’t sign. AND if I ran late I knew she’s safe on the bus and I made sure to pick her up. But leaving a young 3 year old alone on the street is reckless and you should definitely make a fuss


Last edited by amother on Fri, Jul 12 2019, 8:32 am; edited 1 time in total
Back to top

amother




Chocolate


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 9:39 pm
The bus driver was 100% wrong. Even if someone is chronically late he had no right to put a small child in danger. She could have ran into the street, she could have walked off, someone could have taken her. The driver is lucky nothing happened because he would be in serious trouble if anything did. I would call the director and make a very big deal about this.

At the same time I would make sure to be home 10 minutes earlier, but that doesn't take away from the fact that what the driver did was terrible and inexcusable .
Back to top

amother




Puce


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:20 pm
OP, was the women that was with your child there when your child was dropped off? Maybe the driver thought she was waiting for your daughter?
Back to top

SixOfWands




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:41 pm
Sweet as Pie wrote:
I agree wholeheartedly! He was early. His issue. She’s not obligated to stand in this heat more than 2 minutes before the time. Most drivers will stop and honk for 5 seconds if ur not there before the time. HOWEVER, Even if she were not there it’s the drivers obligation to return her to daycamp. Otherwise he’s criminally liable if anything happens to the child. My children’s school sends papers home asking parents to sign permission allowing children off the bus if parent isn’t there. And when my daughter was too young to get off herself I didn’t sign. AND if I ran late I knew she’s safe on the bus and I made sure to pick her up. But leaving a young 3 year old alone on the street is reckless and you should definitely make a fuss


No question, the bus driver should not have let a 3 year old off the bus without an adult there. It was irresponsible.

But you’re wrong about only needing to be there 2 minutes early. The kids get on the bus faster then usual, a kid or 2 before your stop aren’t there, you make a couple of lights, or traffic is light, a bus can easily be 10 minutes or more early.
Back to top

amother




Puce


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 10:56 pm
The schools in my community have a no honking or waiting policy. So it's important to be outside a good few minutes early.
Back to top

yerushamama




 
 
 


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:02 pm
OP, this is terrible! Speaking to the driver and bus counselor is a good idea, but please speak calmly, since you don't have any way of knowing exactly what happened. It may not have been the regular driver or bus counselor, they may have thought that someone who seemed to be rushing towards the bus was you, etc. None of this excuses what happened, but it should change how exactly you put in your complaint. Is there any way to get a five minute warning in real time of their arrival?
Back to top

amother




Cyan


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:02 pm
SixOfWands wrote:
No question, the bus driver should not have let a 3 year old off the bus without an adult there. It was irresponsible.

But you’re wrong about only needing to be there 2 minutes early. The kids get on the bus faster then usual, a kid or 2 before your stop aren’t there, you make a couple of lights, or traffic is light, a bus can easily be 10 minutes or more early.


Ur probably right
My youngest is 8 so I don’t wait anymore and didn’t realize .....and I’m first stop after the school so it’s never earlier than it is.


Last edited by amother on Fri, Jul 12 2019, 8:33 am; edited 1 time in total
Back to top

amother




Oak


Post  Thu, Jul 11 2019, 11:14 pm
I am a mother and DH is on the other side of this situation, a bus driver.

Here are the policies:
Bus driver should make sure kid is awaited by an adult or gets into the house (some mothers wait inside the house at the door). If either of these don't happen, kid gets taken back onto bus and back to school/daycamp. [Note: Not all busses have bus teachers. In such a situation, driver must stop the bus, turn it off, get off, leaving a whole busload of other kids unsupervised, to get the kid back onto the bus.] If it's the last route of the day and school or daycamp is already closed, kid stays with driver until contact with a parent. Driver will usually make sure kid is fed/went to bathroom/etc.

Mother or other responsible adult should be home for child from 2 minutes after time of dismissal. Routes change all the time for many different reasons. A bus nor its driver does not provide babysitting service, merely transportation service. Should a child be needed to be taken back to school or cared for by the driver more than once, the parent will be informed that the child will not be picked up the next morning.

DH once dealt with a mother who was not home for her kids too many times. When her kid wasn't picked up in the morning, she brought the kid herself to school, but then again, wasn't home at dropoff time. It was a huge time and money-consuming ordeal. Not letting the kid get onto the bus at school at dismissal time didn't help either because the mother didn't rush to school to pick up her kid. And the school was left babysitting way past time of latest dismissal.

I'm sure OP isn't this neglectful. But it's important to be mindful of what it entails from the driver's end when you are not home.
Back to top

amother




Coral


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 1:46 am
[quote="amother [ Oak ]" Mother or other responsible adult should be home for child from 2 minutes after time of dismissal. Routes change all the time for many different reasons. A bus nor its driver does not provide babysitting service, merely transportation service. Should a child be needed to be taken back to school or cared for by the driver more than once, the parent will be informed that the child will not be picked up the next morning.
[/quote]

Factor in distance from school (without traffic), for a more realistic time - someone who lives a half hour drive from the school shouldn't need to be waiting at home as early as someone who lives around the corner.
Back to top

ectomorph




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 1:49 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
This is the first time I was late. But usually the bus driver or teacher calls.

You said this child was sent back to camp twice already this summer. It is early July. You need a better system in place.
Back to top

ectomorph




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 1:53 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
They are usually very responsible. Last year she was taken back to day camp twice over the summer.

I called to complain and the secretary (a high school graduate) was being all proper, "that's so unsafe that shouldn't have happened..." IT DID HAPPEN! THAT'S WHY I'M SO FREAKED OUT!
oh, last year.

The driver was wrong. But clearly this happens, and that means you need to change your schedule. Or get a babysitter.

I used to be a bus monitor for a chassidish day camp. It's extremely stressful when a mother is not there and we have to take a kid back. And the kid ends up miserable. She's hot and tired and wants her mommy.
Back to top

ectomorph




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 1:55 am
I just want to say in defense of the driver. It could be he thought he saw u in the window. Or he thought you were a lady passing on the sidewalk . he is also tired and thirsty at the end of a long day with a million kids screaming in the back.
Back to top

amother




OP


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 2:44 am
amother [ Puce ] wrote:
OP, was the women that was with your child there when your child was dropped off? Maybe the driver thought she was waiting for your daughter?


No, she saw her crying and waited with her for a few minutes. My daughter is good natured and doesn't start crying easily. So she must've been waiting for a bit before that
Back to top

amother




OP


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 2:50 am
ectomorph wrote:
oh, last year.

The driver was wrong. But clearly this happens, and that means you need to change your schedule. Or get a babysitter.

I used to be a bus monitor for a chassidish day camp. It's extremely stressful when a mother is not there and we have to take a kid back. And the kid ends up miserable. She's hot and tired and wants her mommy.


I see everyone is up in arms about last year. She went back to day camp because the bus teacher called to let me know they were early, I said I won't make it so they took her back.

Today I arrived at my house at the earliest time the bus had come this season, and she had been there for a while already. I am not blaming the day camp, or the bus driver or teacher... I am simply freaking out over all the could'ves.
Back to top

Rappel




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 2:55 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I see everyone is up in arms about last year. She went back to day camp because the bus teacher called to let me know they were early, I said I won't make it so they took her back.

Today I arrived at my house at the earliest time the bus had come this season, and she had been there for a while already. I am not blaming the day camp, or the bus driver or teacher... I am simply freaking out over all the could'ves.


Thank you for clarifying.

What will you do?
Back to top

amother




Powderblue


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 3:13 am
amother [ Oak ] wrote:
I am a mother and DH is on the other side of this situation, a bus driver.
Should a child be needed to be taken back to school or cared for by the driver more than once, the parent will be informed that the child will not be picked up the next morning.

DH once dealt with a mother who was not home for her kids too many times. When her kid wasn't picked up in the morning, she brought the kid herself to school, but then again, wasn't home at dropoff time. It was a huge time and money-consuming ordeal. Not letting the kid get onto the bus at school at dismissal time didn't help either because the mother didn't rush to school to pick up her kid. And the school was left babysitting way past time of latest dismissal.


They should just do what we do in Israel in the nurseries/ganim - the parents get charged money for every single minute they are late.

There should be a charge for every minute and an additional charge for taking a child back to the school building. Whoever is forced to watch the child receives the money.
Back to top

Beyla




 
 
 


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 3:15 am
NurseK wrote:
OMG!! THREE YEARS OLD?????? I am so traumatized just by reading this, I cannot imagine what you or ur DD were feeling!! My almost 3 year old would maybe run down the block and cross streets Gd Forbid trying to find me. I cant even let me mind go there!
Ugh. BH BH she is ok!!!!!!!


Exactly this. My 3 years old is a baby. Bh your daughter is safe 💜
Back to top

amother




Papaya


Post  Fri, Jul 12 2019, 7:17 am
I finally decided to chime in after seeing this post 3 pages long and most replies were to atrack the mother. I'm responding as a daughter of a bus driver who is driving his "einiklech" by now. He has seen everything under the sun. There could be many possible reasons why the girl was dropped off without her mother there and the DRIVER and the BUS MONITOR (if there even was one) are 100% guilty no matter what.
Now lets dissect this:
If the bus came early and honked and mom was a no show, the BUS MONITOR should've walked the girl to the house and waited with her a minute or so until the door opened and she went inside. If no answer, they go back to daycamp and the mom picks her up from the office

If the bus came late and the mom was a no show, same as above and back to the daycamp office and mom picks her child up

If the bus came on time and mom is not outside but is home, the bus monitor walks the girl to the house.
She's a bus monitor FOR A REASON. She is there to help the driver keep order on the bus and deliver the kids home. Why are there no bus teachers on a big kid route?? Because these kids go down the bus by themselves unlike 3 yr olds who need help getting off this big monster of a bus.

If the mother is a nice person and overwhelmed, she can arrange with the driver or monitor to be called when bus is one or two stops before her stop to give her a chance to actually open the door and/or wait outside.

If the driver is a nasty person and wants to teach this mother a lesson (which is wrong on his end, he needs to complain to transportation director, not take mattters in his own hands) he should drive past the house, stop for a second, honk once and drive the kid BACK TO DAYCAMP SO THE MOM IS FORCED TO PICK UP HER KID which again is wrong and the guy is in the wrong line of work.

If (as one silly poster wrote) the driver is hot and has no patience and wants the route to end already, well, he should retire. He's in the wrong line of work. These are precious babies we're talking about, not boxes that need to be delivered and can be dropped off anywhere.

So to summarize: the BUS DRIVER and MONITOR are to blame 10000000%
If there are any complaints on the mom's end, she needs to direct those to the school and they need to talk to the driver.

Please stop blaming the OP, its quite obvious you posters sound so self righteous and this would nevveeeerrrrr happen to you and until you don't experience something as frightening as OP had, you shouldn't say anything.

OP: you need to call transportation department and speak to the director or even director of daycamp. Someone in a high position to give this DRIVER and BUS MONITOR a good talking to.
Back to top
  Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9  Next  Last >> Recent Topics

Page 3 of 9 View latest: 24h 48h 72h


Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Parenting our children -> Preschoolers

Related Topics Replies Last Post
A PSA from my teenage daughter and me - sheitels
by amother
133 Yesterday at 9:58 pm View last post
Spin off until what age for father give his daughter bath
by amother
15 Sun, Sep 15 2019, 5:52 pm View last post
Scared to sleep alone
by amother
1 Thu, Sep 12 2019, 2:16 pm View last post
My 4.5 year old daughter has no school !
by amother
43 Sun, Sep 08 2019, 3:38 pm View last post
My daughter weighs 65 lbs and has to carry 28 lbs
by amother
16 Thu, Sep 05 2019, 10:06 pm View last post

Jump to: