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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
My simple son
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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 10:49 am
My ds1 5.5 is a smart kid he did well in preschool. After the summer he is entering first grade. His preschool teachers have complimented how well I taught him. But in truth it's not me. We are struggling financially. So I buy my kids less than some of the others in his class. But ds2, 4 yrs, wishes he could have what his friends all have. Ds1 doesnt seem to care The kids all just went on a trip in daycamp d.s 2 told me he would like a certain nosh that some kids brought along. Ds1 didn't seem to care. He didn't really notice. He also is amazed at really simple stuff that most of us hardly notice. Like the birds and squirrels outside how a car that passed by have really big wheels . Sometimes he could take thing very literal but I dont know if its because he still young? For example the citi bus that stops on our corner he asks how the driver knows to stop on our corner does he know that we sometimes like to go to the park? I didn't train him this way I feel it's not the human nature. is this just his personality? Or is this behavior concerning?
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amother
Wine


 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 10:53 am
Why are you calling him simple? He sounds like a curious, inquisitive boy. I'm not sure what's concerning you.
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amother
Oak


 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 10:54 am
Personality.
And could be he noticed but has picked up on your vibes and knows not to ask. That's the way I was from a young age.
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amother
Purple


 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 10:56 am
Can you clarify why you're concerned? He sounds like an adorable and curious little boy
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pesek zman




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 10:57 am
Why do you think his personality has an anything to do with how much money you have or how much you spend? This is an odd correlation to make
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Stars




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 10:59 am
He sounds like a normal kid to me. I'd be more concerned about the one who wants everything he sees.
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amother
Periwinkle


 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 11:01 am
I would see interest in birds and squirrels and unusually big car wheels as a positive thing. He has an eye for details and wants to know about things he sees - it could be the beginnings of scientific interests and until proven otherwise, I'd treat it as such. And I view it as much better than just wanting what everyone else has - if my children do that, I consider it herd mentality and blind conformism and I try to get them off that, out of principle.
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amother
Goldenrod


 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 11:01 am
pesek zman wrote:
Why do you think his personality has an anything to do with how much money you have or how much you spend? This is an odd correlation to make


She’s comparing him to ds2, who notices what others have. Ds1 doesn’t.
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amother
Oak


 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 11:02 am
Some kids who grow up with little money are sensitive and pick up on those vibes from when they are young. That's my story. Probably not a good thing, I'm always anxious and worry a lot about not having. Never ever asked my parents for anything wouldn't have dreamed of it, but certainly felt the lack of stuff.
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dankbar




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 11:05 am
If he is a happy child & doesnt need much doeant mean hes not a smart child
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groovy1224




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 11:06 am
So you want him to be LESS happy with what he has? MORE jealous of others? More difficult to impress?

Why are you looking for problems here?
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ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 11:08 am
He sounds like a mother's dream. Make sure to give him enough affection and attention even if he doesn't seek it out. He needs it just as much. Much nachas!
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Laiya




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 11:30 am
OP, agree with the others, he sounds bright and adorable. Your thread title is concerning. I hope that's not how you view him.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 12:42 pm
Ok here's my worries he is still young now. But as hes getting older I see his friends bragging to him about cool stuff they got or he may sometimes point out these real simple stuff to his friends and they will say big deal what's so interesting. I feel it sometimes makes him different. While he seems to play nice with others. He enjoys playing on his own sometimes even more.
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pesek zman




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 12:48 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Ok here's my worries he is still young now. But as hes getting older I see his friends bragging to him about cool stuff they got or he may sometimes point out these real simple stuff to his friends and they will say big deal what's so interesting. I feel it sometimes makes him different. While he seems to play nice with others. He enjoys playing on his own sometimes even more.


What’s wrong with being different? He’ll find his people, he’ll find friends.
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Zehava




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 12:48 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Ok here's my worries he is still young now. But as hes getting older I see his friends bragging to him about cool stuff they got or he may sometimes point out these real simple stuff to his friends and they will say big deal what's so interesting. I feel it sometimes makes him different. While he seems to play nice with others. He enjoys playing on his own sometimes even more.

He seems like a bright, sensitive, and introverted child. I’m guessing ds2 is more similar to you, so you consider that the norm. But people are different and enjoy different things. That’s what makes us all unique.
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OutATowner




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 1:00 pm
Op, I agree with what everyone here is saying. But I think I understand what you mean, only because I had a student like that. As he gets older the gap widens and he doesn't pick up on certain social cues and other kids don't know how to relate to him. Is that your concern?
Having said that, from what you wrote it does not sound like your son will have that issue. There are many other factors that would cause alarm. The fact that he doesn't notice or want what other kids have is healthy, if he didn't notice which two kids he played with all afternoon I would be concerned. It's a matter of extremes.
He sounds adorable and may you have much nachas!
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Rappel




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 3:00 pm
He sounds very intelligent, and sweet. You may have a young poet, scientist, or doctor on your hands. Congratulations!

I'm afraid that his peers may quash his desire to share the beautiful world around him somewhat, but there's no reason his mother should. Foster his curiosity. Bring him to museums, ferries - anything and everything. He'll thank you one day for helping him be him.
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behappy2




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 14 2019, 3:26 pm
He sounds really yummy! All kids are different. Love him for teaching you things you wouldn't have thought to learn on your own, for helping you appreciate the wonders of the world. Our children are our biggest teachers!
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amother
Pink


 

Post Mon, Jul 15 2019, 5:38 pm
I have one that when younger we used to see how much just went right over his head. As he is older now, he is very smart, very social, likes to dress well...and just has a very appreciative, caring and giving nature.
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