Academic Girls Elementary in Lakewood

amother

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 12:55 pm

Chayalle wrote:

Bnos Esther Malka might be more your type then.

I was under the impression that Bnos Esther Malka was five towns / Flatbush balabatish type though? We still identify as yeshivish, just not right wing to the extent of no library books whatsoever etc

Chayalle

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 12:58 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Hmm....I know people there who fit that description and some who don't. I think every school has something of a mix. But I would say my relatives who sent to BEM are not strictly yeshivish.

In terms of library books....I'm sure there are families in both Bnos Bais Yaakov and BEM have their children reading library books. Some may not advertise it....

debsey

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 3:44 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I was considering it but then heard that they are extreme in terms of exact skirt and hair length even for the younger graces and not allowing any non Jewish books whatsoever . Would you know if that is true?

My nieces go there (to Bnos Yaakov). My sis in law tells me that reputation is way overblown. Her kids definitely read English books and tznius is taught in a very positive and uplifting manner.

I can tell you that I've had to have professional interactions with the school and they impress me a lot. Don't believe everything you hear on social media. My nieces love their school, so much that they talk about it in such a positive way. (And they are VERY bright and don't seem understimulated.)

sra

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 5:07 pm

BEM is not strictly yeshivish. very nice, friendly crowd. definitely academic. My friend told me (don't know if it is true) that they only hire teachers with four or more years experience

amother

Beige

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 6:32 pm

Every school has a bit of a mix. You can't go looking for a school with a checklist:
do they allow parents to have smartphones?
how long must skirts be?
can they read non Jewish books?
do fathers have to wear a white shirt?
Find a school that fits you in most ways. In every school you will find that everyone has slightly different standards.

amother

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 6:39 pm

amother [ Beige ] wrote:

I don’t have a checklist . Just looking for something in the middle of the road. 🤷🏻‍♀️

For example, I care very much about tznius but would prefer if my daughter would not be in fear of getting in trouble if hair or skirt is an inch too long , etc

amother

Cerise

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 7:28 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I’m sure you’ve heard this but FRUM is an acronym for Fanatically Religious (anyone more than you), U (you in the center), Modern (anyone less than you)
There is no perfect middle of the road for everyone...
I’d imagine most girls want to conform to their school rules, and don’t end up getting in trouble for an extra inch. The school may request that they get a haircut or lengthen their skirts but that doesn’t stop them from being middle of the road/normal

sra

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 7:59 pm

Correct Amother Cerise.
OP, if you care very much abt tznius why do you want that your daughter shldnt fear getting caught if her hair/skirt is too long/short?

amother

Dodgerblue

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 8:03 pm

sra wrote:

Correct Amother Cerise.
OP, if you care very much abt tznius why do you want that your daughter shldnt fear getting caught if her hair/skirt is too long/short?

School rules are almost always way beyond the actual halacha when it comes to tznius. And there are schools that are known to create a very tense, rigid atmosphere about tznius, while other schools don't harp on it as much (and the students honestly aren't more tznius in one than the other).

debsey

Mon, Jul 15 2019, 9:24 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I don't get that impression of Bnos Yaakov at all. Just the opposite, in fact. My impression is that tznius is taught in a happy, positive fashion and there's a sense of love and respect between the girls and the hanhala. And my nieces don't come across as extremely overly tznius, nebby girls. They are happy and full of pep.