Protect your family!!!!

gingertop

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:07 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

I also email my grocery order to the grocery but I use a special email address “eidelmeidel@hotmail so that the man taking my order doesn’t think I’m flirting or giving off vibes by emailing from my personal email address.

You're playing hard to get +hot vibes. Do better, thunderstorm. Someone's innocent husband is being nichshal because of you.

Jewishfoodie

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:09 pm

PSA: Theres a gym called (curves). I feel it is our duty to call them ( 1 800 allshapesnsizes) and ask them to change the name to "Lines" so that our sons never have to ask that highly dreaded question..

'Ima, ma zeh curves?!'

It keeps me up NIGHTS .

myself

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:10 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

I’d rather do some outdoor errands myself because I’m afraid others will cause my DH to be nichshal. So I started wearing a garbage bag to cover my curves when I take the garbage out to the can.

I also email my grocery order to the grocery but I use a special email address “eidelmeidel@hotmail so that the man taking my order doesn’t think I’m flirting or giving off vibes by emailing from my personal email address.

Just make sure no one throws you out with the garbage Wink

Jewishfoodie

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:17 pm

You women are playing with fire using extra v!rgin olive oil. I threw it out of my house and out of my neighbors' houses too.

We now use married-with-two-kids olive oil. It tastes like I'm going to gan eden. Because im soo special.

SixOfWands

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:18 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

You're using HOTmail? You might as well prance around in leopard print and pleather!

thunderstorm

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:19 pm

Jewishfoodie wrote:

Oh. We hold not to use olive oil at all...that’s the oil the Muslims use before blowing themselves up.

rachelmom1

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:25 pm

Well any form of emale is asur haven't you been involved in the movement. Not sure how they allowed the old fashioned male to be delivered. Or maybe old fashioned is more muttar....

SixOfWands wrote:

You're using HOTmail? You might as well prance around in leopard print and pleather!

rachelmom1

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:31 pm

Now that I'm alone in the bungalow, my boys are in camp and DH stays in the city.. back to cheery O's for breakfast. Can't have that stuff around the house with the boys home.

Jewishfoodie

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:35 pm

rachelmom1 wrote:

Well any form of emale is asur haven't you been involved in the movement. Not sure how they allowed the old fashioned male to be delivered. Or maybe old fashioned is more muttar....

There's a new service available in place of "gee-male" and "hotmale" especially for us. If you want more info, just contact me at jewishfoodie@coldwomen.com and ill help u get connected. There's an even better service (frigidwomen.com) but they say men hate it so its your choice

Sunny Days

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 7:43 pm

Jewishfoodie your sn screams of taaves achila, and then you come here all holey Moley saying about which foods you don’t eat? My foot. Sell that to your galach.
I’m shocked. We are way more frum than you. We’re even having a fast day on Sunday so we’re not nichshal with any kind of bugs or other kashrut issues.

Jewishfoodie

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 8:09 pm

gamzehyaavor wrote:

And you forgot to mention my hot dog image..Jews with dogs? Jews, who overeat with dogs?!

Im taking it upon myself not to eat all night tonight, (taanis layla, it's a thing. Cuz I said so.) Just so that I can fast on Sunday with a clear conscience.

After I finish eating at Doma, of course. That veal flatbread.. mmmmmm. ...and FRESH DONUTS! Seudas hamafsekes in preparation for tonight's fast of course...

Cookiegirl

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 8:16 pm

Ummm....donuts have a hole...just saying...I think those are officially off limits effective immediately

Jewishfoodie

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 8:19 pm

Cookiegirl wrote:

Ummm....donuts have a hole...just saying...I think those are officially off limits effective immediately

Duh..its what makes them a holy ..a holey food....thats what my priest said, anyway..

southernbubby

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 8:22 pm

Metukah wrote:

I've banned my father for visiting for that reason.

Can't have the neighbours suspecting.

It's only a problem if he enters through the chimney. BTW, you know those deer that I was complaining about? Tell him that they are good for pulling sleds and that he should come to Monsey and get them.

aricelli

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 8:23 pm

We think its very important to learn a bit of mussar every night over dinner. We decided that Rabbi Arush and Rabbi Ashear cannot hold a candle to the wisdom found right here- so we do a shtickel ima each night at dessert...

Fox

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 8:28 pm

I'd forgotten how funny everyone here is!

This is just a reminder that you should seriously consider adopting my chumra: recipes involving more than five ingredients are not truly kosher. Yes, that includes salt and vanilla. No exceptions!

aricelli

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 8:36 pm

And forget about those pagan indian haired wigs... its those heads they sit on top of that should be banned. Three Cleopatras stare at me all through the night... a banal vacant stare... stares straight through me. A foam bust is a idol and we complain of hair? For shame! I’m switching to seltzer bottles

aricelli

Wed, Jul 17 2019, 8:37 pm

Fox wrote:

And if you really want to be kosher those five ingredients are:
Barbeque sauce
Soy sauce
Duck sauce
Lotus cream
Spicy mayo