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Am I justified in being very disappointed?
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 11:58 am
I think Zaq had some good things to say as a template. I don't think I'd use the word frum on an Amazon review, maybe Orthodox or observant.
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ora_43




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 12:47 pm
Sort of?

On the one hand, like several people have said, the book obviously wasn't trying to be a frum book. It's not like the author was lying, or even being intentionally misleading.

OTOH, I sometimes write, and I would NOT put a frum-sounding name and bio on a not-frum story, for exactly this reason. And I'm not even talking about an adultery-positive story. Presenting yourself as frum creates certain expectations.
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urban gypsy




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 12:52 pm
ora_43 wrote:
Sort of?

On the one hand, like several people have said, the book obviously wasn't trying to be a frum book. It's not like the author was lying, or even being intentionally misleading.

OTOH, I sometimes write, and I would NOT put a frum-sounding name and bio on a not-frum story, for exactly this reason. And I'm not even talking about an adultery-positive story. Presenting yourself as frum creates certain expectations.


How is her name frum sounding? Her name is her name. She can't change the number of children she has either. Still waiting on where she misrepresented herself as frum.
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amother
Coffee


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 1:00 pm
urban gypsy wrote:
How is her name frum sounding? Her name is her name. She can't change the number of children she has either. Still waiting on where she misrepresented herself as frum.

Her blog is called Frum Gay Girl, but I doubt that is what the poster meant.
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urban gypsy




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 1:04 pm
amother [ Coffee ] wrote:
Her blog is called Frum Gay Girl, but I doubt that is what the poster meant.


Okay but that wasn't on the book.
And to OP if she saw her blog title that would be the opposite of representing herself as frum.
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amother
Pumpkin


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 1:32 pm
I’d also be very disappointed and books are expensive- that said thanks for paying it forward it’s angood reminder for me to check publishers and reviews and realize every frum looking author may not be and may in fact be “off the derech” and/or writing about something I would not choose to read despite the deceptive cover. Like an lgbt activist where I would not expect to find one. Um yeah.
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amother
Violet


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 2:37 pm
If after a quick google search I've found the right author/book, I would also be disappointed. It looks at first glance to be a Jewish book, written by someone who looks like a frum woman. It emphasizes her Jewishness and makes it sound like it is a frum book.
Just because it isn't a Jewish publishing house-how many people look at the publishing house before buying a book? I don't.
There are other 'Jewish' authors out there who make no question of the fact they are anti-frum and it's obvious their agenda, but to me this book didn't look like that.
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urban gypsy




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 2:44 pm
amother [ Violet ] wrote:
It emphasizes her Jewishness and makes it sound like it is a frum book.


You do realize that the VAST majority of Jewish authors aren't frum right?
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amother
Violet


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 2:53 pm
It's just that most non frum writers aren't usually hiding much-Constrast these 2 book descriptions- one seems on the surface could be a more frum novel, the other already suggests it's not that frum...

"a deeply affecting, morally insightful story and offers a rare look inside Brooklyn's Chasidic community.
In Williamsburg, Brooklyn, just a block or two up from the East River on Division Avenue, Surie Eckstein is soon to be a great-grandmother. Her ten children range in age from thirteen to thirty-nine. Her in-laws, postwar immigrants from Romania, live on the first floor of their house. Her daughter Tzila Ruchel lives on the second. She and Yidel, a scribe in such demand that he makes only a few Torah scrolls a year, live on the third. Wed when Surie was sixteen, they have a happy marriage and a full life, and, at the ages of fifty-seven and sixty-two, they are looking forward to some quiet time together.
Into this life of counted blessings comes a surprise. Surie is pregnant. Pregnant at fifty-seven. It is a shock. And at her age, at this stage, it is an aberration, a shift in the proper order of things, and a public display of private life. She feels exposed, ashamed. She is unable to share the news, even with her husband. And so for the first time in her life, she has a secret—a secret that slowly separates her from the community."

..................................................................

"Beautiful, fragile Dina Reich, a young woman in Jerusalem's ultra-Orthodox haredi enclave, stands accused of the community's most unforgivable sin: adultery. Raised with her sisters to be an obedient daughter and a dutiful wife, Dina secretly yearned for the knowledge, romance, and excitement that she knew her circumscribed life would never satisfy. When her first romance is tragically thwarted, she willingly enters into an arranged marriage with a loving but painfully quiet man. Dina's deeply repressed passions become impossible to ignore, finding a dangerous outlet in a sudden and intense obsession with a married man, with terrible consequences. Exiled to New York City, Dina meets Joan, a modern secular woman who challenges all she knows of the world and herself. "
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amother
Chocolate


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:05 pm
Neither sound like frum novels.
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amother
Crimson


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:09 pm
urban gypsy wrote:
You are correct, but my point still stands as I wrote it.
That might be a bad example but I have encountered non Jewish people named Goldie.


Terrible example as indeed Goldie is a MOT but I do agree with your point. 🙂

I am a frum woman but if I wrote books, they would very unlikely be about something kosher! They might even have racy bits in them. I guess I’d better invent a pen name before OP reads my not-yet-conceptualized or written books. Hiding
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Mama Bear




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:34 pm
There are frum writers who write for secular audiences. Rochelle Krich, Faye Kellerman, etc.
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amother
OP


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:35 pm
Quote:
They might even have racy bits in them.
See, as long as the description would note that, those of use who prefer to read clean books would know to stay away.

Some of the ebay sellers don't even bother posting summaries. So I have started googling titles and I know to avoid those that say "steamy" and those that mention passion, adultery etc.

I guess I was not so careful here.

The story of the 57 year old pregnant woman sounds fascination (and like fantasy) but I am now wary of the author. And I would assume that the author's picture will be different on this volume.
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amother
Chocolate


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:35 pm
amother [ Violet ] wrote:
If after a quick google search I've found the right author/book, I would also be disappointed. It looks at first glance to be a Jewish book, written by someone who looks like a frum woman. It emphasizes her Jewishness and makes it sound like it is a frum book.
Just because it isn't a Jewish publishing house-how many people look at the publishing house before buying a book? I don't.
There are other 'Jewish' authors out there who make no question of the fact they are anti-frum and it's obvious their agenda, but to me this book didn't look like that.


Maybe the author didn't have an 'agenda'?

If you are looking to only read 'kosher' fiction - best practice would be to look at the publishing house.
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Mama Bear




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:38 pm
hahaha! williamsburg, pregnant at 57, and ashamed? That's funny. I dont think that would happen. ever.
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urban gypsy




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:39 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Quote:
They might even have racy bits in them.
See, as long as the description would note that, those of use who prefer to read clean books would know to stay away. Some of the ebay sellers don't even bother posting summaries. So I have started googling titles and I know to avoid those that say "steamy" and those that mention passion, adultery etc.


OP honest question, how do you search for books to read?
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amother
Chocolate


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:47 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Quote:
They might even have racy bits in them.
See, as long as the description would note that, those of use who prefer to read clean books would know to stay away.

Some of the ebay sellers don't even bother posting summaries. So I have started googling titles and I know to avoid those that say "steamy" and those that mention passion, adultery etc.

I guess I was not so careful here.

The story of the 57 year old pregnant woman sounds fascination (and like fantasy) but I am now wary of the author. And I would assume that the author's picture will be different on this volume.


The publisher is trying to sell books, not warn people not to buy them.
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amother
OP


 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:54 pm
Quote:
OP honest question, how do you search for books to read?

I've gotten some recommendations here. Jo Dereske for example. Really enjoyed here (though there is the occasional profanity, it's not pervasive & I just cross them out : )

I have been collecting the works of several old time authors - Mary Roberts Rhinehart, Agatha Christie, Rex Stout, Mary Stewart. I also buy books for teens from back in the olden days, those are mostly clean.

I buy some 'cozy mysteries' and see if I like the author.

(I don't remember being as upset with Rochelle Krisch or Faye Kellerman. Though not so excited that I would strive to collect their complete works.)
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urban gypsy




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 3:57 pm
So how did you stumble across this one?
I guess in the future just be careful to read the summary and comments on Amazon, and be aware that most Jewish writers, even those writing about frum people, are not frum, so assume the book will be "inappropriate" unless you know for sure otherwise
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jul 24 2019, 4:14 pm
Mama Bear wrote:
There are frum writers who write for secular audiences. Rochelle Krich, Faye Kellerman, etc.


And Ruchama King Feuerman.
And how out there they get varies too.
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