"Best things come in small packages" said to a tall person

amother

Olive

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 1:13 pm

amother [ Ruby ] wrote:

Ok, my doctor is in CHOP so that's not near you. I'm sure your doctor is good, glad you scheduled it!

Just to add to the previous post - my sons projected height was 5'7 but because the doctor said it's not an exact science and he might be wrong (he could have ended up 5'5 instead) he recommended the growth hormone shots. He was delayed growth and they found that he had borderline low growth hormone so we were able to get it approved by insurance. He's 5'6 right now and still taking the shots!

Interesting! 2 years ago dr predicted 5'7, then last year 5'6, then his growth seemed to just stop at 5'4 and now dr says, maybe, maybe he'll hit 5'5 or maybe he'll stay at 5'4 but it's too late bec he finished puberty and they don't treat someone who's 5'4 Sad

So thank you and PUce for this encouragement!

Was your ds finished with puberty when you started? What made you go to the endo if they were predicting 5'7?

amother

Pink

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 1:15 pm

nchr wrote:

No. It just seems, in my experience, that a person who admits to being short and still claims that even if given the option to safely increase height would still stay short is lying through her teeth or clueless. I don't have any prejudice toward shorter individuals. I was stating statistics, although many of them are a result of the fact that the higher your socio economic class, the more likely you are to be taller due to access to vaccines, proper nutrition, rest, schooling, etc. However, there are more benefits to being tall than to being short and I truly believe anyone who complacently says she wishes to stay short is lying. Embracing your own body and loving yourself does not mean that if given the option you wouldn't change it. No one is perfect, and just because you have something doesn't mean it cannot be considered a negative attribute.

I think your “experience” is being colored by your blinkered attitude. I am not lying through my teeth or clueless thank you very much. I find your posts here and poll on the other thread completely pointless. They seem to exist just for you to put down shorter women who must be “clueless” if they are happy with their height. To me that is a very negative attitude, far worse than being a shorter person. Who is wise? Someone who is happy with their lot. A short person happy being short is wise. Unless Pirkei Avot is also “clueless” to you. Can't Believe It

amother

Ruby

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 1:26 pm

amother [ Olive ] wrote:

So thank you and PUce for this encouragement!

Was your ds finished with puberty when you started? What made you go to the endo if they were predicting 5'7?

How old is he? I'm not sure how it works with puberty as a different amother said it might be based on other things. I'm sorry you had this experience, hope things still work out!

A few of my kids were delayed growth so I took them to the endo (think 1 percentile height on the growth charts). One of my kids was projected 5'5, we asked him if he wants to do the shots and he said no "good things come in small packages!". (He has stopped growing and is around 5'5). My other son was delayed but his projected height was 5'9 so the doctor did not recommend the shots. My son was annoyed at the time, but he did start growing (at nineteen!!) And he is indeed now 5'9.

With this son it was not as clear cut what his height would be - the doctor said that each visit gave him a different number- similar to you I guess- and we asked my son if he wants to do it and he said yes.

We gave our sons the decision as it requires daily injections and they have to really be ok with that.

amother

Honeydew

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 1:30 pm

Growth hormone shots are only for people who are growth hormone deficient. My DD was always ultra petite but her hormone levels (checked when she was 10) were perfect. Bone density scans showed her to be about 3 years behind, and the endocrinologyst we took her to in Columbia predicted that she would continue growing even in her late teens and end up at around 5'1.

And she was right! DD even had a growth spurt at age 19! At almost 21, I thinks she's done growing and she is 5'1, which is petite but tall enough for a girl that I wouldn't want to intervene. (She is fine with her height but hates when people think she is cute. I doubt she'd want to be 5'9 though...but she wouldn't have minded another inch or two....)

Interestingly, my next daughter was petite all thru elementary school (not as much as first DD though) and in high school she suddenly shot up. She is now 5'5 and B"AH so tall and graceful. I'd guess at 18 she is done growing.

mommy3b2c

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 1:40 pm

nchr wrote:

She's clearly jealous or her daughter is/was. There is no woman on this planet (probably not in the modern world) who wouldn't prefer to be 5'9 over 5'4 or even 5'5.

Lol. I guess I don’t exist. I am 5’4” and I wish I was 5’3”. I feel bad for women who are taller then 5’7”. (Of course I don’t say that to their face. I’m sure plenty women that height are happy with it. But I would never want to be.)

amother

Black

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 1:47 pm

I posted this on the other thread that is now locked.

amother [ cornflower ] wrote:

I find it interesting that you're so passionate about this. Are you tall, average, or short?

I'm that ideal 5'9" LOL and have been since I was 11 years old. As a tween and teen I HATED being tall (because who wants to be so noticeably different at that age?) but I grew (pun intended) to be just fine with it. It definitely is nice to be tall but it's also really hard to find clothes. I can't say I'd mind being 5'6" but honestly I never really thought about it - this is who I am and that's just the way it is.

My kids are tall but if they'd be short, I wouldn't do anything about it unless they're abnormally short (or, on the flipside, abnormally tall). What's wrong with average?

If I had to choose between being 5' or 6', I'd honestly have a hard time choosing. I have nieces who are 6' and it isn't easy to be that tall in the frum world - and I have friends who are under 5' and that's not easy either.

I'd say most people are probably average height (after all, that's what "average" means) so they don't particularly feel strongly one way or the other.

I would still like to know how tall nchr is and why she is so passionate about this! Is she short/average and has always wished she's taller (so therefore EVERYONE short must feel the same way) or is she tall and deep-down self-conscious about it (so EVERYONE must be jealous of her)?

I'm genuinely curious.

And mommy3b2c, don't feel bad for me, now I'm happy being tall Wink

it has plenty of advantages.

amother

Puce

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 1:48 pm

amother [ Honeydew ] wrote:

So growth hormone shots could only help her gain 1 - 3 inches if not deficient, versus a person who is deficient and can probably gain many more inches.

mommy3b2c

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 1:50 pm

amother [ Black ] wrote:

I posted this on the other thread that is now locked.

I would still like to know how tall nchr is and why she is so passionate about this! Is she short/average and has always wished she's taller (so therefore EVERYONE short must feel the same way) or is she tall and deep-down self-conscious about it (so EVERYONE must be jealous of her)?

I'm genuinely curious.

And mommy3b2c, don't feel bad for me, now I'm happy being tall Wink

it has plenty of advantages.

Feeling bad is the wrong words I guess. I’m just happy that’s not me. I hope everyone feels comfortable with their height. And I’m glad I’m happy with mine.

nchr

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 1:51 pm

amother [ Black ] wrote:

it has plenty of advantages.

PM me because this thread and the other went in a crazy direction.

amother

Chartreuse

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 2:01 pm

amother [ Burgundy ] wrote:

Yup, in the Jewish world, being 5'8" or 5'9" you will definitely be one of the two tallest in your BY graduating class. But it is a normal height as far as average women of the world go...between 5' 5" and 5' 9" is average, shorter is more petite than average and taller is taller than average. But if you are over 5' 7" in the frum world there will be comments...

Hopefully this thread will open eyes that even though universally height is prized, that doesn't mean tall people are open to shaming. As someone else said, when commenting on someone else's looks, either a compliment, or nothing at all.

The average American woman is 5'4.

Rubber Ducky

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 2:04 pm

The other thread was locked — not by me, but I can lock this one! Can we have a civil discussion without short people being called liars or clueless if they're happy with their height?

— Rubber Ducky as Mod.
Very happily 5'2" on a tall day and have never wanted to be taller.

amother

Burgundy

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 2:12 pm

I would actually appreciate if you would lock it. I am a tall woman, and reading everyone write that they would NEVER want to be my height, or over 5' 7" is making me feel like an ugly freak. I know it's a very sensitive spot, but I feel like a teenager again, being shamed for being different than the feminine norm. I am actually crying, which I am a little embarrassed to admit. So please just let's stop the discussion, thank you.

amother

Lime

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 2:18 pm

amother [ Puce ] wrote:

I'm 5'5 and if I could have surgery to make me taller. I would. DH is 6'1 and so I doubt our children will be short, but I've discussed it with our doctors and we will probably give them HGH because even if there is no hormonal imbalance, it can give you an extra 1 to 3 inches so of course I'd rather my son be 6'3 than a natural 6'0 or 5'8 instead of 5'5. Everyone in my family is tall and no one has ever complained, but short people complain all the time or say they are making peace with the situation. I even feel conscious at 5'5.

OMG

Why are you so insecure?

Compared to my height at 4'11 you are tall-half a foot taller.

amother

Pink

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 2:30 pm

amother [ Burgundy ] wrote:

I am so sorry you have been hurt by this thread. I really wish nchr hadn’t started this conversation which is not helpful for OP and hurtful to others. I agree that we should stop this discussion and hope this thread is locked.

Hugs burgundy.

amother

Pumpkin

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 2:32 pm

amother [ Burgundy ] wrote:

I don't think anyone should be feeling bad about their height whether tall or short.
Both have their advantages and disadvantages. And beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
I'm almost 5'7" as well.

amother

Chartreuse

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 2:34 pm

nchr wrote:

I'm on the lower end on average height, and all of my friends who were 5'6 and taller felt self conscious about their height. Being tall for a frum woman makes her stand out and tower over her friends, and makes shidduchim harder, not everyone wants that.

ETA: I don't want to make tall women feel bad, they are beautiful. I am just responding to nchr who can't imagine a short woman being happy with herself.

amother

Pink

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 2:40 pm

amother [ Pumpkin ] wrote:

I don't think anyone should be feeling bad about their height whether tall or short.
Both have their advantages and disadvantages. And beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
I'm almost 5'7" as well.

What a dismissive and insensitive post. Imamother Burgundy said she was feeling hurt. She feels hurt whether or not you think she “should” feel that way. Please show some compassion. This is exactly why I agree with her that this thread needs to be locked.

mommy3b2c

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 2:41 pm

amother [ Burgundy ] wrote:

So don’t read it then. You need to work on yourself to be happy with your own body. Just like I don’t want to be 5’7” there are tons of women who don’t want to be 5’4”. There’s no reason to feel like a freak. There’s nothing freakish about that height for a women. But nchr insisting that no women in their right mind would prefer to be 5’4” or 5’9” just begged a response.