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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
Breaking bad news
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tf




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 26 2019, 8:25 am
What does stbx stand for?
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amother
Slategray


 

Post Fri, Jul 26 2019, 8:43 am
tf wrote:
What does stbx stand for?


Soon to be ex (husband)
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Fri, Jul 26 2019, 9:17 am
BIL got divorsed recently ( married for number of years/ has kids ) . Both me and DH spoke together with older (post -HS) kids and I spoke individually to younger kids, on a week day.
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amother
Black


 

Post Fri, Jul 26 2019, 10:04 am
I wouldn't tell them until it becomes immediately relevant to them. The relevance to them is that they won't be seeing stbx at the next family function... so tell them several hours before that.
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amother
OP


 

Post Fri, Jul 26 2019, 11:30 am
It's going to be relevant as soon as they're no longer living together. We see them several times a week. Sometimes one or the other of them will take the kids off the bus. The stbx is moving back their hometown (across the country) by the end of the summer.
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amother
Black


 

Post Fri, Jul 26 2019, 11:42 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
It's going to be relevant as soon as they're no longer living together. We see them several times a week. Sometimes one or the other of them will take the kids off the bus. The stbx is moving back their hometown (across the country) by the end of the summer.


Nice close family!

Okay. I would still frame it as - 'sad news, we won't be seeing X because X moved out of the house and moved because X&Y won't be married anymore. As opposed to 'sad news - X&Y are getting divorced.

Sucks Sad
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amother
Mint


 

Post Fri, Jul 26 2019, 11:55 am
amother [ Slategray ] wrote:
Soon to be ex (husband)


Thought it meant shitbox Hiding
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Notsobusy




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jul 26 2019, 12:01 pm
amother [ Black ] wrote:
I wouldn't tell them until it becomes immediately relevant to them. The relevance to them is that they won't be seeing stbx at the next family function... so tell them several hours before that.


I disagree. First of all, they are probably aware that something is going on, they see their mother is tense an upset, there might be a lot of private phone calls or private conversations, they may already be nervous about what's going on. The sooner you let them know the sooner they can deal with it. Also, you want to give them time to process the information and ask questions about it, it's not fair to throw it at them a few hours before a family function.
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