Why is Shabbos Nachamu such a "thing"?

amother

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 8:53 am

The first time I heard of this is when I went to camp.

I understand its significance in Yiddishkeit, but why do we act like it's Pesach in terms of the extravagance? Why does everyone "must" go away?

Baffling to me.

Rutabaga

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 8:56 am

I think it depends where you live. No one I know goes away specifically for Shabbos Nachamu. If anything, people go away at the end of the summer between camp and school.

amother

Floralwhite

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 8:58 am

Not everybody thinks they must go away. There are some people who are looking to go away for a week during the summer and they choose this week.
What upsets me is that my daughter's day camp had off on the Friday of Shabbos Nachamu.

simba

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 8:58 am

It’s not a thing in Judaism. It’s a time when Jews should reflect on what we are missing and hopefully act in a way that will iyh bring us closer to the Geula. No need for extravagance.

ShishKabob

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 9:09 am

simba wrote:

It’s not a thing in Judaism. It’s a time when Jews should reflect on what we are missing and hopefully act in a way that will iyh bring us closer to the Geula. No need for extravagance.

I agree. We've been exploited and pulled in that direction thanks to the marketing people that make the world believe that this minhag dates back hundreds of years.
ftr, some people do have a minhag to go away in the three weeks as part of self imposed galus, nothing luxurious, nothing at all like the extravagant weekends that they make. But that's an entirely different thing.
Living in monsey, this hasn't been a thing either. If anything, people from the city are always reserving their Shabbos in Monsey for Shabbos Nachamu.
May Hashem send us Moshiach and may we experience the ultimate geulah in our days.

honeymoon

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 9:12 am

Well, if the nine days is such a "thing" with the gourmet menus and lavish dairy meals then I should hope that shabbos nachmu which really is a happy day would be celebrated. Our priorities are so skewed that we don't realize how ludicrous we appear when we 'celebrate' the nine days which culminates with a shabbos nachmu bash as the 'highlight'.

ShishKabob

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 9:15 am

honeymoon wrote:

Honestly, is this across the board? or is it that the ones that celebrate the nine days get so much publicity?
Reminds me, that if you don't mourn for the churban then....

amother

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 9:15 am

miami85 wrote:

I think in many yeshivos bein hazmanim starts around the 9 days, so Shabbos Nachamu is the first opportunity for many families to go on vacation.

I didn't think of that- thanks.

chipmunks

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 9:16 am

I think it's because you can't do a real vacation during the three weeks and it's the first opportunity. Especially for people whose kids have school until the three weeks.

thunderstorm

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 9:17 am

miami85 wrote:

I think in many yeshivos bein hazmanim starts around the 9 days, so Shabbos Nachamu is the first opportunity for many families to go on vacation.

Yes. I think that’s where the whole “vacationing” for Shabbos Nachamu started.

honeymoon

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 9:24 am

ShishKabob wrote:

Honestly, is this across the board? or is it that the ones that celebrate the nine days get so much publicity?
Reminds me, that if you don't mourn for the churban then....

It is probably the people who celebrate the nine days who get more publicity than the people who mourn the way we were intended to mourn. I don't post a picture of my salmon and mashed potatoes dinner on social media while we do get to see the gourmet five course meals which others' make. So I guess we hear more from them but at the same time it rubs off on those around them and reduces our sensitivity.

And your last line scares me. I heard once that it is not a punishment that we won't be zoche to celebrate the geula. It is a natural consequence. The lower down a person is, the more potential he has to appreciate anything good that comes his way. If we have everything we want and give into all our taivos then there will be less capacity to appreciate bounty. A scary, yet illuminating thought.

amother

Babyblue

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 9:39 am

I only know of Shabbos Nachamu being a big thing for Singles weekends and shidduchim.
It is after the 3 weeks and right before 15 b'Av.
Kind of like people getting engaged Lag B'Omer.

Didn't know anyone else did anything then.

proudmomma

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 10:01 am

There's a joke that's sadly funny.
Avraham is marrying off his 3rd daughter & choking from the financial pressure. He has a brainstorm! He'll break into his neighbor Yankel the gvir's house, take some $ & hopefully pay it back eventually. He even has the perfect timing- Shabbos Nachamu! The house will definitely be empty.
Shabbos arrives & before going home for the seudah, Avraham takes Yankel's hidden key & quietly lets himself in to the dark quiet house. When he walks into the dining room he's shocked to see Yankel & his family sitting & eating in the dark. Feebly, Yankel calls out " Take whatever you want, but please don't tell anyone we're home for Shabbos Nachamu!"

It's a joke, obviously a frum jew would never steal or be mechalel Shabbos!

yerushamama

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 10:19 am

This year 15 B'Av is Erev Shabbos Nachamu, so there will be a lot of people going to places in the north of Israel, so they can go to Amuka on Erev Shabbos.

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 10:26 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I don't know about "must." I've never done it and know very few who have, but I understand why some would want to. Many people whose families follow a school schedule have some vacation time in the summer. A good portion of the summer is taken up by the three weeks. So they take a vacation when they can. Why not?

SuperWify

Wed, Aug 07 2019, 10:38 am

honeymoon wrote:

This. This. This.

Why oh why are all dairy restaurants stuffed to the brim during the 9 days? A relative owns a dairy restaurant and she says the nine days is the best business of the year!

believeit

Thu, Aug 08 2019, 7:22 am

I only heard this concept on Ima... Not irl.I guess somewhere it is a thing but not in my community. In my community we just go on vacation after T'av because we don't go in the 9 days. That's all.

amother

Blue

Thu, Aug 08 2019, 7:45 am

SuperWify wrote:

This. This. This.

Why oh why are all dairy restaurants stuffed to the brim during the 9 days? A relative owns a dairy restaurant and she says the nine days is the best business of the year!

Meat people don't know how to cook dairy.