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DH sabotaging my diet

 
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amother




OP


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 11:20 am
Am I the only one this has happened to?
I've never been fat (before my last pregnancy I was 5'5'' and about 123lbs) but I've had some postpartum belly pudge since giving birth 8 months ago. I started a diet and exercise regimen since they were about 6 months old and lately have been getting really positive comments from other women. I also laughingly told my DH that on my way back from the mikveh when I was waiting at the bus stop to go home, a guy did a u-turn on the road, got out of his car and asked if I was single (awkward, but let's face it, a huge compliment for a mom of 4 kids!) DH, who himself is big into healthy eating and has been encouraging me to eat better for ages, has started bringing all kinds of junk into the house. Pizzas (he NEVER would buy pizza before), big chocolate cakes on shabbat etc. I reminded him I'm trying to eat better and he snapped "you're fine". I think he's trying to sabotage me.
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amother




Crimson


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 11:22 am
Hugs, OP.

Do you think that maybe your DH got upset when you mentioned that another man was attracted to you?
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FranticFrummie




 
 
 


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 11:25 am
Ask him why he's doing that. It sounds to me like he's being a bit insecure.

In the meantime, remind yourself that he can have all the junk he wants, but you want better for your own health. Just because he brings it home, doesn't mean you have to eat it with him.
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amother




Sapphire


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 11:27 am
Is he eating this food?
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amother




Navy


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 11:29 am
If he's the kind of person who would intentionally sabotage your diet then Hug . I'm sorry, and you deserve more respect than that. If it's not intentional, let him know that you would appreciate if he could help you in your healthy eating quest by not bringing home temptations.
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urban gypsy




 
 
 


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 12:02 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I also laughingly told my DH that on my way back from the mikveh when I was waiting at the bus stop to go home, a guy did a u-turn on the road, got out of his car and asked if I was single


WHY WHY WHY would you tell your DH that?
Are you sure you aren't trying to make him jealous?
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amother




Oak


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 12:13 pm
amother [ Crimson ] wrote:
Hugs, OP.

Do you think that maybe your DH got upset when you mentioned that another man was attracted to you?


That was my thought as well. His reaction might be subconscious but you are giving him the message that you're trying to lose weight to make yourself attractive to other men.
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amother




OP


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 12:56 pm
I wasn't trying to make him jealous, but it was such a bizarre occurance that I blurted it out when I got home. He's been insecure regardless and constantly wants me to wear baggy clothes (even belting loose tops is a no no)
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amother




Vermilion


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 1:02 pm
I don't even get what's flattering about that encounter. I would consider it creepy.

His only interest was in your body. He knows nothing about you that would make him stop other than wanting to hook up. How is that flattering?
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amother




Bronze


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 1:12 pm
If you’re the same poster who recently posted about significant issues in your marriage this is really the least of your problems.
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amother




Teal


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 1:19 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I wasn't trying to make him jealous, but it was such a bizarre occurance that I blurted it out when I got home. He's been insecure regardless and constantly wants me to wear baggy clothes (even belting loose tops is a no no)

I hope this doesn't come at more nasty than intended, but if your husband is the type to be so insecure that he insist you always wear baggy clothes, and forbid you from wearing even belt, then he is probably the last person on Earth you should have told that a man was attracted to you. Next time tell it to your friend, not your husband who already has issues in this area.
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amother




Rose


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 1:26 pm
Have you asked him?
Just ask.
Not in an attacking way: "Hey, why are you sabotaging me!?!"
But in a calm way, "I feel really good and proud of myself that I've been able to get this weight off, but I get the feeling that maybe for some reason it bothers you? Can we talk about it?"
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amother




OP


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 1:31 pm
amother [ Rose ] wrote:
Have you asked him?
Just ask.
Not in an attacking way: "Hey, why are you sabotaging me!?!"
But in a calm way, "I feel really good and proud of myself that I've been able to get this weight off, but I get the feeling that maybe for some reason it bothers you? Can we talk about it?"



I think this is the best advice really. I'm going to ask him in a slightly joking way and see how he responds. Could be that it's not calculated but rather he's lost interest in keeping me on the straight and narrow
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amother




Honeydew


Post  Tue, Aug 13 2019, 1:33 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
He's been insecure regardless and constantly wants me to wear baggy clothes (even belting loose tops is a no no)


This sounds much more concerning than the fact that he's sabotaging your diet.
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