How many hours a week do you work? New York

amother

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:22 am

Discussing with my husband. He claims he knows no one in our age group,( 20s-30s still having kids etc.) that has a wife who works part time in New York.
If u live in New York, still have young children, how many hours do you work? Bonus if you write what your husband does/his hours. I work about 15-17 hours a week and I’m exhausted. But my husband claims I’m an anomaly. I don’t know how everyone does it!

egam

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:34 am

I always worked full time (40+ hours) plus commute. And I know many people who work full time with little kids. When you can’t afford to work part time, you find a way.

amother

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:34 am

amother [ Mint ] wrote:

27 hours. Dh works 41 hours.
But who cares what I do? This is about you.

Yes it’s about me, I’m just wondering if he has a point. He says ny is so expensive and most pple can only make it work with duel income.

amother

Mint

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:38 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Yes it’s about me, I’m just wondering if he has a point. He says ny is so expensive and most pple can only make it work with duel income.

That's true for us.

amother

Slategray

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:39 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Yes it’s about me, I’m just wondering if he has a point. He says ny is so expensive and most pple can only make it work with duel income.

Most people can only make it work by having a minimum family income of X. There are lots of men who are earning twice what your husband earns... and I can say that without a clue about your husband's earnings.

amother

Lime

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:39 am

I live in Brooklyn, my husband works very long hours that vary by season so anywhere around 50 hours a week and I work 24 hours a week. I can't imagine working full time before my kids are all in school, I can't leave a baby or toddler for 8 hours a day

baby12x

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:46 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Yes it’s about me, I’m just wondering if he has a point. He says ny is so expensive and most pple can only make it work with duel income.

The question is, can you make it? Are you barely making it or living paycheck to paycheck?
If yes, and he works full time then either you need to work more or move or get a higher paying job.

If you are living more than paycheck to paycheck then you shouldnt work if its hard for you just because other people do

amother

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:52 am

baby12x wrote:

We aren’t doing amazing. We can live like this affordablly bec we are in a tiny apt with cheap rent. but aren’t able to afford a house.. I just don’t know how to mentally and physically handle working so much. I have a baby (still nursing) and two other kids that are preschool age. How do u all handle carpools, drop offs, lunches, dinners, shabbos, laundry, dr appointments, not to mention attention to the kids? I’m basically out of the house the same hours as my kids even though I’m not working full time.

amother

Natural

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:55 am

DH works about 45 hours a week, and makes about $65K a year. I am currently working a little more than 18 hours a week, and making a little more than $12K a year. I am pregnant with our first, and have absolutely no clue how we will work it out once there is a baby. I am ready to move out of Brooklyn to Philly, where I have family and rent is cheaper!

amother

Slategray

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 12:00 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

So your husband wants you to go to work full time?

amother

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 12:07 pm

amother [ Slategray ] wrote:

So your husband wants you to go to work full time?

He understands my feelings but feels like this is our reality and I probably need to work more. I should add that he works very long hours, so isn’t really around all week.

amother

Mint

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 12:10 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

He understands my feelings but feels like this is our reality and I probably need to work more. I should add that he works very long hours, so isn’t really around all week.

Can the family manage with the hours you are putting in now? If so, then leave things the way they are and don't shake things up. Also make sure to wait until you can handle another little one.

amother

Slategray

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 12:15 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

He understands my feelings but feels like this is our reality and I probably need to work more. I should add that he works very long hours, so isn’t really around all week.

Does he have some good ideas of how all the errands, cleaning and childcare are going to be accomplished?

amother

Ecru

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 12:20 pm

Full time plus commute is about an hour and a quarter each way. No way could we afford for me to work part time even if my job lent itself to such an arrangement. I make decent money compared to an unskilled office worker or a BY kindergarten teacher but I’m not a doctor lawyer accountant type.

amother

Sun, Sep 01 2019, 12:21 pm

amother [ Slategray ] wrote:

Does he have some good ideas of how all the errands, cleaning and childcare are going to be accomplished?

Not really... he isn’t being mean about it, he’s just saying listen this is how it is in ny. Everyone works a lot. Pple make it work. I just don’t know how pple do it..