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My son is never happy - constant whining/complaining/crying

 
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amother




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Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:11 pm
I have a 2nd grader who is pretty difficult - always has been at various times. He is argumentative, freaks out easily when he doesn’t get his way, always seems dissatisfied....it’s a constant battle. The days are exhausting with him because he is frequently complaining. I try to remain patient and validate his feelings and - most importantly- stay CALM. But I’m so exhausted at the end of a day with him. I love him to death and he can be such a sweetie - but I’m not sure how to deal with this behavior. I think I’m going to seek out a child therapist to help him with feelings of frustration and anxiety, but in the meantime....how can I help him, and help myself to remain patient and optimistic? I end up in such a mood from all the crying and arguing. 😣

Last edited by amother on Wed, Sep 04 2019, 3:29 pm; edited 1 time in total
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barelyawake




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 8:26 am
Anyone?
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FranticFrummie




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 8:32 am
https://www.bookdepository.com.....D_BwE

This is an excellent book, with practical advice and work sheets for both your and your son. It's used by Children's Hospital in parenting classes and group therapy dealing with anxious children. I did the course with DD, and it made a big difference.
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barelyawake




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 8:34 am
Thank you! I’ll check it out
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amother




Mint


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 11:45 am
I experienced something similar with my daughter. Speaking with a therapist really helped me gain the tools to remain calm and figure out what to do with all the complaining. It helped me learn how to ignore her behavior (in a healthy way) and help her work through a lot of anxiety related to transitions. She is still difficult to deal with, but not as often, and I have learned that it's ok for me to take a breather before going back to deal with her again. We call it a "Mommy time out."

Speaking to a therapist is a great start and there are also a lot of great books out there.


There's also a new Jewish kids book called "What Can We Say to Make it a Great Day" (I think) that can help your son recognize his complaints and how he can become more positive.
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barelyawake




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 1:42 pm
Thank you!!!

amother [ Mint ] wrote:
I experienced something similar with my daughter. Speaking with a therapist really helped me gain the tools to remain calm and figure out what to do with all the complaining. It helped me learn how to ignore her behavior (in a healthy way) and help her work through a lot of anxiety related to transitions. She is still difficult to deal with, but not as often, and I have learned that it's ok for me to take a breather before going back to deal with her again. We call it a "Mommy time out."

Speaking to a therapist is a great start and there are also a lot of great books out there.


There's also a new Jewish kids book called "What Can We Say to Make it a Great Day" (I think) that can help your son recognize his complaints and how he can become more positive.
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amother




Pumpkin


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 5:28 pm
amother [ Mint ] wrote:
I experienced something similar with my daughter. Speaking with a therapist really helped me gain the tools to remain calm and figure out what to do with all the complaining. It helped me learn how to ignore her behavior (in a healthy way) and help her work through a lot of anxiety related to transitions. She is still difficult to deal with, but not as often, and I have learned that it's ok for me to take a breather before going back to deal with her again. We call it a "Mommy time out."

Speaking to a therapist is a great start and there are also a lot of great books out there.


There's also a new Jewish kids book called "What Can We Say to Make it a Great Day" (I think) that can help your son recognize his complaints and how he can become more positive.

A therapist for you? Or parenting by a licence person or a therapist your for your daughter?
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amother




Orchid


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 5:43 pm
My son with ADD/ADHD used to act like this all the time. It was really difficult for everyone, including him.
I wonder if you should check if that's an issue with your son?
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amother




Ruby


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 5:57 pm
I think it very likely is an issue for him.

amother [ Orchid ] wrote:
My son with ADD/ADHD used to act like this all the time. It was really difficult for everyone, including him.
I wonder if you should check if that's an issue with your son?
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amother




Navy


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 7:51 pm
Our son was/is the same way. When he was in middle school I couldn’t take it anymore. We had a complete Neuropsych and he cane back with ADD. He takes ADD medicine now and a small dose of Zoloft. It helped a lot.
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amother




Ruby


Post  Wed, Sep 04 2019, 11:05 am
Note: he is only like this with me, never like this with his dad.
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amother




Honeydew


Post  Wed, Sep 04 2019, 3:24 pm
My adhd son is/was like this as well, now he's in fifth grade and has been on a small dose of zoloft for a year and the days are a lot calmer
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Mkay




 
 
 


Post  Wed, Sep 04 2019, 5:06 pm
Throw him a LOT of love and attention. Not saying that this is the core of his issues, which should be dealt with. But when you take your most difficult child and give him a lot of love on those most trying days, I find it cuts the difficulty in half.
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