Dear teacher, smile at your students

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Forum -> Working Women -> Teachers' Room

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amother

Teal

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:53 pm

amother [ Gold ] wrote:

Is this beginning of year? I find teachers stricter first few weeks and once classroom decorum is established they ease up a lot.

This. I'm not in the don't smile till Xmas camp but I'm definitely strict in the beginning and I relax as the year goes on once routines sure in place. I work hard to build relationships with my public school students and smiling isn't the only way to do that. In September I'm definitely watching kids do even basic things so I can check any misbehavior before it escalates and I can model appropriate behavior. I wouldn't judge a teacher based on one thing like the recess line.

amother

Chocolate

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 12:56 pm

I feel like I should share this poem I saw for all teachers out there:

I woke myself up
Because we ain't got an alarm clock.
Dug in the dirty clothes basket,
Cause nobody washed my uniform.
Brushed my hair and teeth in the dark,
Cause the lights ain't on.
Even got my baby sister ready,
Cause my mama wasn't home.
Got us both to school on time,
To eat a good breakfast.
Then when I got to class the teacher punished me,
Cause I ain't got a pencil!!!!

Teachers, please have a heart when teaching! Remember, it's about much more than a pencil!!

Jewishfoodie

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 1:03 pm

ShishKabob wrote:

I did meet you and you were SOO shocked that someone smiled at you before you smiled at them! lol

That was YOU?! Awesome! Loved your outfit!

amother

cornflower

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 1:14 pm

After reading this I smiled at the lady standing in line paying for her shabbos shopping.
I live in London
What a dirty look I got in response
The next lady I smiled looked like she thought I was retarded LOL

Jewish foodie can u come educate the Londoners!

SixOfWands

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 1:29 pm

little neshamala wrote:

I have. I always smiled and acted friendly, while maintaining an obedient classroom. I had total control, but without resorting to drill sergeant intimidation.

As a student I always felt that the teachers who didnt smile much and stood at the door waiating for perfect attention before marching in, without a smile, and then issuing a crisp "shev na" or "open up to page 63 in your textbooks" while keeping their face totally impassive, keeping all the little kids under their reign.....I always always felt that these teachers were insecure and didnt know how to control a classroom otherwise. I remember being quite young and feeling scorn for one of my teachers for this reason precisely.

Of course they do. And schools with parallel classes should always try to ensure that kids are matched to teachers of the right personality.

I have one who will challenge the authority of any teacher, and who needs a strict disciplinarian. And I have another who would break down inconsolably and not be able to go back into the classroom if disciplined (thankfully, its only happened once).

amother

Periwinkle

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 1:46 pm

amother [ cornflower ] wrote:

Jewish foodie can u come educate the Londoners!

I'm also in England and I make a point to smile at people as I walk past them, some on occasion might give me an odd look, but for the most part they also smile and some might even say 'hello' Very Happy

Once I was standing in line at the bank and the woman behind me looked so familiar-I knew I had seen her face before. We finally worked out we passed each other on the way to work each day and I had smiled etc enough that it felt like we'd known each other more than that.

Bruria

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 3:51 pm

amother [ Chocolate ] wrote:

This. Some teachers punish for no reason, if the kid moves an inch out of line, if they don't sit up straight, it's like they are given zero understanding about basic psychology.

Jewishfoodie

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 4:02 pm

amother [ cornflower ] wrote:

Jewish foodie can u come educate the Londoners!

With pleasure! In Manhattan, if you make eye contact with anyone accidentally, like literally anyone, you give a smile. Not a huge, "I've got Ecstasy in my pocket and I'm looking for an alligator to share it with" psychotic smile, just a small, 'I acknowledge we share the planet' smile. That's IF you make eye contact.

Why are some people so down on living that they look for a meaning in a smile? A smile is just that. A friendly look.. Don't give up! Keep smiling! More often than not, people will smile back. The more intrepid ones will be bold enough to say, "do I know you?" and to them I say, "you do now..", And guess what? They smile back! No harm, no foul..

groisamomma

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 4:11 pm

amother [ Teal ] wrote:

Public schools run very differently than frum schools in this aspect. We don't have the same need to be "in control" of a classroom, and the code of conduct is applied by all teachers equally whether they are smile-y or not, whether they are new to teaching or veteran teachers. Not smiling isn't a thing. Glaring silently at a kid like the frum teachers do won't make our students squirm like our own frum kids do. They just won't know what you want from them. Every teacher stands at the door and says things like, "thank you for coming today," and "I'm glad you came to school" because that's what teachers do there. The environments are totally different; it's comparing apples to oranges.

amother

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 4:48 pm

little neshamala wrote:

This is precisely what I meant! I feared my teachers and did not look forward to going to school!

amother

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 4:50 pm

Bruria wrote:

This. Some teachers punish for no reason, if the kid moves an inch out of line, if they don't sit up straight, it's like they are given zero understanding about basic psychology.

I got punished as a student for not doing jumping jacks! My teacher threatened to call my mother and I said okay, my mom thought my teacher was crazy LOL

Bruria

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 5:14 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I got punished as a student for not doing jumping jacks! My teacher threatened to call my mother and I said okay, my mom thought my teacher was crazy LOL

Wow! Your mom is right, she was crazy! Very Happy

thunderstorm

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 5:39 pm

amother [ Chocolate ] wrote:

Wow. I relate to this poem so much. This was a typical day in my childhood.

teachkids

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 6:10 pm

While I'm waiting for my students to settle I stand still. Once they're sitting and prepared, I walk in, give a smile and start class. They know I'm waiting for them to be ready to start our fun for the day.

amother

Jade

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 6:38 pm

groisamomma wrote:

I work with new teachers and I find this fascinating! I don't know who invented this frum "style" of classroom management . It really doesn't exist elsewhere.

Try as I might, I don't know how to undo it. Because our kids are conditioned to these methods, they see warmer, casual interactions as a sign of weakness. And once that happens, it becomes impossible to teach and then no one benefits.... it is baked into the culture of our schools and I think it is a tremendous disadvantage.

The most I have been able to do for now, was get teachers to relax in the middle of the year and establish relationships with consistency and fairness..... sigh.....

amother

Brown

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 7:02 pm

I agree, and I think it's spilled over into our camps (both day camps and sleepaway) which is a shame. The head counselors are just plain mean to the counselors and impart the attitude that you can't yield an inch to the campers lest utter chaos emerge (sarcasm, obviously). But this brings to mind the thread about the counselor who wouldn't let an amother's daughter retrieve her water bottle one hot day for no good reason other than a rigid attitude of "rules at all cost" probably because she was scared of getting a tongue lashing from her supervisor.

amother

Aquamarine

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 7:03 pm

public school teachers thanking the children for coming? never heard of that, not me, my extended family, sibs, parents etc
being smiley? some were some weren't we knew it was luck of the draw
and once they had tenure good luck saying anything
even before, a very strong union, and the only game in town they were really not interested in anyones opinions or gripes - not them or the administration

amother

Brown

Thu, Sep 19 2019, 7:13 pm

I work in a public school and know of teachers who have been fired. Even tenured ones. It just takes longer if the teacher is tenured and involves a lot of paperwork. And requires an administrator who is willing to rock the boat.

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