My son is feeling hurt

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Post  Sat, Sep 28 2019, 4:02 pm
There's a boy in my son's class who's 'out to get' my son. There has been some tension between them for a while, but it seems that the other boy may be jealous and he's constantly looking for ways to put down my son. I think we need to speak to the teacher- but is there ever a time that we should speak to the boy's parents directly?
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Post  Wed, Oct 02 2019, 3:23 pm
This is a tough question. My experience with my DD is that I was told repeatedly by friends (and on imamother) to go through the school only. We have done that for years and sometimes it works, sometimes not.
I want to add though that for my daughter's particular situation (junior high) I think what finally has gotten things a lot better is that I did casually speak to two parents on separate occasions this year and all I really said was that DD was having a hard time socially, was lonely, etc. I did not point fingers or place blame and or even suggest that the moms speak to their daughters. But I think those moms must have said the right thing to their DDs b/c baruch Hashem there has been an improvement in my DD's experience at school. These moms were friends of mine, BTW.
I don't know if this would apply in your particular situation though given the gender, age, and particular bullying situation your DS is in. And the girls moms I spoke to were not the main problematic instigators in the class, they were more the bystanders type.
In the past, I have also been on the receiving end where a mom-friend contacted me about my son not behaving nicely to her son at school and I was ok with that. Again, she's a friend and I was able to successfully direct my son's behaviors.
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