IM THE WORST HOUSEKEEPER

amother

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 5:59 pm

MAJOR MAJOR VENT.
I'm the worst housekeeper ever.
I feel so sad and I feel like a failure.
This keeps happening again and again.
I'm just so sad 😭

icebreaker

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:07 pm

I am too. Don’t stress yourself about it. I do what I can and my house is pretty presentable lol. Do what you can and don’t drive yourself crazy trying to be perfect.

thunderstorm

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:12 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

MAJOR MAJOR VENT.
I'm the worst housekeeper ever.
I feel so sad and I feel like a failure.
This keeps happening again and again.
I'm just so sad 😭

What makes you feel like such a failure? Is someone criticizing your housework? Or are you criticizing yourself? In what department do you struggle most with? Maybe we have ideas and tips to assist. I’m not exactly a great housekeeper myself but I can be if I put my mind to it. Getting ideas and tips are always helpful.

thunderstorm

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:17 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

My husband just let loose at me for my tornado of a house. That's why. And he's right.

Does he help you at all? Or does he expect you to be the perfect balabusta? It sounds like you are being hard on yourself and it’s being triggered by your husband’s comments.

amother

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:19 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

Definitely.
The other adult in the household.
Who is extremely capable and used to do the cleaning, but unfortunately due to his schedule literally doesn't have the spare minute in his schedule at this point in time.
He's tired of me saying I'm a failure.
Me? I come home from working f/t with a commute so drained I'm unable to lift a finger (my blood work is fine if that's what anyone would suggest) & everything is "excuses" because if he had my schedule, he WOULD be able to do it all. He's capable.im not.

amother

Amber

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:21 pm

Man op are you me... Same thing. Every few weeks we have a huge fight. I hate dealing with cleaning ladies so I don't get them.

tweety1

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:22 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

My husband just let loose at me for my tornado of a house. That's why. And he's right.

For heaven's sake, it's yt schedule. I make sure to clean the house 2x a day. In the morning and at night a little. The rest? Kids are home all day I'm not running after them all day. The past 4 weeks are so off schedule I find it nearly impossible to keep the house even decent regularly.
But maybe that's just me cuz I'm the worst housekeeper Idea

thunderstorm

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:23 pm

Wow. I don’t even know what to say. Is there a way both of you can designate 10 minutes a day either before work or after (whenever you have most energy), to put things in their place? 10 minutes won’t clean everything but it makes a huge difference overall.

amother

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:29 pm

tweety1 wrote:

It has nothing to do with yom tov Hiding

amother

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:30 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

For him, no. He really doesn't have the time.
But it's not that.
It's the piles of laundry that need to be folded it's my things all over the place.
It's stuff that get grimy.
No matter what I focus on there's always more.
I just can't get my act together.

tweety1

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:32 pm

amother [ Amber ] wrote:

Man op are you me... Same thing. Every few weeks we have a huge fight. I hate dealing with cleaning ladies so I don't get them.

I do bh have a cleaning lady. So technically my house isn't dirty but it's clutter. But now during barely any school days schedule, I'm very chilled or I try to be anyway. My kids are fed? They have clean laundry? For me that's the most important now.

amother

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:32 pm

[quote="amother [ Coffee ]"]If youre the worst housekeeper then I’m second to the worst. But I’m the most chilled mom ever! So there![/quote
Well this is totally my philosophy.
But the other adult..
And also, the house can't look like it looks now..it's bad

amother

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:34 pm

amother [ Amber ] wrote:

Man op are you me... Same thing. Every few weeks we have a huge fight. I hate dealing with cleaning ladies so I don't get them.

We (he) finally agreed on cleaning help.
But I don't know where to find anyone. (I'm in Brooklyn. I don't really know anyone.)

Mommyg8

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:34 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

My husband has more energy than me also. There is no way I would be able to keep a spotless house if I worked full time and had a commute. I think it's time to face reality and realize that you just can't do it. I suggest paid cleaning help.

amother

Burlywood

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:35 pm

Me too. And my husband has no time to help either and hes a clean freak.
I have a LOT of cleaning help--11 hours a week. It's a huge expense but we need it.
In between its messy...
No advice. It's hard. And boring and annoying.

amother

Coffee

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:36 pm

[quote="amother [ OP ]"]

amother [ Coffee ] wrote:

If youre the worst housekeeper then I’m second to the worst. But I’m the most chilled mom ever! So there![/quote
Well this is totally my philosophy.
But the other adult..
And also, the house can't look like it looks now..it's bad

I hear you friend...

thunderstorm

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:39 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

We (he) finally agreed on cleaning help.
But I don't know where to find anyone. (I'm in Brooklyn. I don't really know anyone.)

There should be cleaning lady agencies in Brooklyn. Maybe someone can give you the contact info

amother

Floralwhite

Thu, Oct 17 2019, 6:46 pm

Similar situation, except my DH works full time & me only part time so I have much less of an excuse. My DH does pitch in a lot but is resentful. We budget for a lot of cleaning help even though it doesn’t make sense with our income, we make it a high priority along with food & bills. We figure it’s cheaper then marriage counseling. Highly advise putting serious effort into finding someone. Speak to neighbors, friends anyone u know. Search Facebook or ask on whatsapp groups. It’s worth every penny!!