I'm totally embarrassed and want to fix my mistake

amother

Sun, Nov 24 2019, 1:35 pm

I said something stupid. I was not thinking before I spoke and when I feel highly anxious which I was then and sat by a close family simcha. A lady I don't have anything against. She is "I would say a blonde" not the most blonde but yes you cud call it blonde. Was sitting near me we know each other not personally but our kids go to same school and we have seen each other. In the conversation, which I don't remember at all I said that" in secular world they call ."dumb blonde" and said I don't know why pp wud say that. Then I felt like bury myself for being sorry. But didn't apologize, I was completely under enormous stress and didn't think much till I came home. How can I apologize unless I call her.

sequoia

Sun, Nov 24 2019, 1:39 pm

Oh no

You’ll just embarrass her all over again.

Least said, soonest mended.

amother

Denim

Sun, Nov 24 2019, 1:42 pm

This was a little hard to understand. Did you use the phrase "dumb blonde" when talking to someone who is blonde? I bet she's forgotten it already, especially as it seems that English isn't your first language. Don't worry. Stuff happens.

zaq

Sun, Nov 24 2019, 2:41 pm

If you were telling her you don’t know why people say “dumb blonde,” you have no reason to apologize. True, you shouldn’t have brought up the topic, but you didn’t call anyone a dumb blonde. Best-case scenario, she doesn’t consider herself blonde and thinks your remark was bizarrely random. In any case, bringing up the topic again would only make things worse. Let sleeping dogs lie.

Librarian

Sun, Nov 24 2019, 2:42 pm

Leave it

amother

Tue, Nov 26 2019, 2:42 pm

thanks all for your support

Amalia

Tue, Nov 26 2019, 7:14 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

OP, I don’t know how or whether you could fix this mistake, but I relate to this problem. When I am nervous in social situations, I always mix up the greeting and say, “it was nice to meet you” to people whom I know for ages, and “it was nice to see you again” to people whom I never met before. And things like that.

I actually bought a book called “The Fine Art of Small Talk” and started reading it - decided it was well written and would be useful, but then got distracted and did not get very far. I want to come back to it and read it, though - maybe you can look into something like that.

Come to think of it, what are good strategies for getting control of such a pattern? (I mean saying random or awkward things when stressed in a social situation.) Maybe some people here will have some ideas or suggestions.

STR331

Tue, Nov 26 2019, 7:56 pm

im blonde and I don't get insulted when people call me blonde or sa dumb blonde.. I know its a term ppl use

pizza4

Tue, Nov 26 2019, 8:06 pm

It's a dumb term. Makes no sense to me. I wouldn't get offended, it means nothing about a person's intelligence.