S/o are teachers horrible?

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Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling

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amother

Wed, Dec 11 2019, 10:01 pm

Unfortunately this is at least the second thread in a short time with tons of unfortunate, horrible stories of powerful people attacking vulnerable kids. Yet when asked about the opposite, ppl in that position who did good for their kids, the answers are fewer and far btw. Is this because teachers are horrible? Or because human nature is more to forget the good? Or because it’s expected for them to be good so it’s not memorable or something else?

mom_13

Wed, Dec 11 2019, 10:53 pm

When teachers do damage, the repercussions tend to be tremendous. so yes, even if it happened a long time ago, or it was just a minor incident, to a child it feels like something huge. The child grows into an adult, but the impact doesn't shrink.

Ruchel

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 2:31 am

Jews are horrible.
No?

southernbubby

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 4:54 am

The good is expected. Every once in a while, you see RD articles about teachers who went above the call of duty but most kids would be happy just to not be traumatized.

amother

Bisque

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 5:23 am

I am a principal of a small, warm school. I know that such teachers exist, but I am having such a hard time with how many horrible stories are being told and the degree to how horrible they are.

I know that I am not in denial when I say that I don't think anything like that happens in my school. We are the type of administration that gets instant feedback from the parent body about every little thing. I and my fellow administrators and teachers have a very open door type of policy with the students who come to me about even very minor things that go on in the classroom and we resolve it together.

So, it's not that I am personally worried about my school, but I am finding these threads very triggering. I am acutely aware of just how vulnerable the students who are placed in our care are, and I worry about this constantly.

I really thought the world has come to a much better place by now and I am saddened to see that such incidents are still happening......

fish

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 5:45 am

Yes teachers are horrible, they are only in it for the money LOL

, seriously thou I teach and put my heart, soul and many unpaid hours into it. Hopefully most teachers are in this job b/c they love it (deff not for the $ money b/c we don't make much). Like anybody else, teachers are human and can make mistakes. As a whole thou I think we are just normal people trying are best and if there is a teacher that is not then they shouldn't be teaching.

amother

Orange

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 5:46 am

It is scientifically proven that people react more strongly to and are more likely to remember and be vocal about the negative. We have to WORK to focus on the positive.

icedcoffee

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 6:34 am

Is this a real question?

ectomorph

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 6:39 am

They're human

Are bosses horrible? Google bad boss and good boss stories ...

Are mothers horrible? Google abusive mothers...

People are human.

amother

Rose

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 7:06 am

Teachers are not horrible. They are regular human beings like you and me. They are simply overworked and expected to be superheros. And the exact same things that you do as a mother are considered unacceptable for a teacher. They are expected to do everything and also do it perfectly.
Would you say you are a horrible mother because you yelled at your kid's the other day?
If we held mothers to the same standard as teachers then there would be a whole lot of horrible mothers too.

Who decided that it's normal for one person to take care of a class of 30 kids ? Even 20? Would you be able to take care of 20 children as a mother ? It's simply inhumane.
Have you see classrooms these days? One teacher for an insane amount of children ? What's considered normal- a preschool class of 20 kids with one teacher one assistant - sounds reasonable right?
It's not!! When one kid is screaming because she fell down and the assistant is in the bathroom helping a child with an accident and then 2 more kids get into a fight then teacher gets overwhelmed and will probably lose it with those 2 children. If there had been a third teacher there then third teacher could have handled it.

I firmly believe we expect too much of teachers. We expect them to be able to handle a class of 25 kids manage discipline and also teach and also manage all the paperwork copies and details work involved in a class.
When you see a mother with 8 kids you say woah how does she manage. Imagine all classrooms could have 8-10 kids.

amother

Seashell

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 9:31 am

I think there are many wonderful teachers, but parents usually appreciate them fully when they have a problem child and it’s so obvious how wonderful the teacher is. Otherwise the thought is, happy that the year is going smoothly. It’s when teachers are bad that parents feel strongly enough to post. Human nature, same reason why people are more likely to leave bad reviews on a website than good.
That said, my son had a phenomenal Rebbe and I wrote an article about him in one of the Jewish magazines because I had such hakaras hatov.

amother

Babypink

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 10:36 am

My teachers were just regular teachers. None did anything exceptionally good. They were 19 years old, straight out of seminary and just trying their hardest to keep us all intact.
So there are no "good" stories to tell.

There are, however, bad stories. Like when I was severely bullied, and when I went crying to the teacher, she yelled at me (actually raised her voice) and said "well, you should hear what they're saying about YOU!" The girls went behind my back to lie to the teacher to tell her that I was saying this and doing that, and she actually believed them.
Or when I was misbehaving (I WAS EIGHT) and giggling with my friend in the back of the classroom, and my teacher embarrassed me and said out loud "if your gonna act like a baby, I'm gonna treat you like a baby", and sent me to the 1st grade class for a month. And when my parents called the principal, he said that the teacher is from a long line of yichus, so what she's doing is right. So noone did anything about it.

Unfortunately, there are more stories where a teacher went out of her way to do something bad, than where teachers go out of their way to do something good.

nylon

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 11:37 am

Over the years my kids have had many wonderful teachers.

But when you get that one terrible one, it can have a huge impact on a child.

ddmom

Thu, Dec 12 2019, 1:35 pm

I have a bad memory so I don't know if I never had any bad experience in school or if there weren't any. I'm horrified at some of the stories on the other thread.
I remember once being at a sheva brachos and a friend of mine was telling me that her and a bunch if parents were trying to have the rebbi fired. My son was in that rebbi's class the previous year with no incident. I was actually in the middle of telling her that I mostly had good experiences with the rebbeim. I was shocked!!
Teachers have bad days too.
It's a shidduch, it's hard to get along with all the kids in the class!
And let's face it, some kids are really hard to deal with! Even our own children drive us nuts sometimes!!
(I'm still traumatized about the rebbi that stepped on kid's toy on purpose to smash it, it seems so cruel, can't really find an excuse for that one!!)

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