What would you consider a tragedy?

amother

Smokey

Sun, Jan 12 2020, 5:10 pm

Flip Flops wrote:

Alright, if you think that is a good idea than go ahead and give away all your children to keep the one with ds.

I’m not giving away any of my children. I don’t want to - Hashem gave them to me to care for. I just don’t understand why it’s so accepted to throw away a child with challenges over any other child. If they’re giving away all their children, well, that’s admitting you’re a terrible parent and someone else would do a better job. Giving away a particular child just means you don’t want that one. So let’s not pretend that these people are acting altruistically.

Flip Flops

Sun, Jan 12 2020, 5:53 pm

amother [ Smokey ] wrote:

Ok, I don't want this to come across harsh, but you seem to be pretty narrow minded in understanding some of the challenges that families in our communities face.
Of course nobody would say to give away a child with ds without good reason, but there are circumstances where rabbanim, therapists, mentors, etc. will tell parents to give their child with special needs to be raised by another family, be it for the good of the child or the good of the rest of the family. I was involved in one such case and you cannot imagine the pain of the parents (wonderful people!) who knew that giving up this special needs child was the best thing they can do for the health of the baby and the rest of their family.
I am so happy that you are wrapped up in your cocoon where you are not privy to the pain, suffering, heartache, and challenges that some people live with.
Please don't make it sound like parents who are forced to make such an awful decision do so out of selfishness.

amother

Burgundy

Sun, Jan 12 2020, 7:18 pm

Seven months ago my 81 year old mom swam 15 laps and knew all her great grandparents cousins and family name them she had lung cancer and was in a coma with feeding pegs in her stomachs and dialysis and breathing tubes she died that’s a tragedy now my dad is sick

amother

Amethyst

Mon, Jan 13 2020, 10:33 am

Flip Flops wrote:

If another chassidish family adopts the DS baby then they probably also have many kids. Why is it so much easier for them to care for the child ?

Flip Flops

Mon, Jan 13 2020, 11:42 am

amother [ Amethyst ] wrote:

If another chassidish family adopts the DS baby then they probably also have many kids. Why is it so much easier for them to care for the child ?

Are you serious?
Because the number of children in the family doesn't equate being able or unable to care for a child with special needs. There are other circumstances in peoples lives that can prevent them from being able to care for a special needs child.
Again, I am glad to see there are imas out there who can not even fathom what kind of challenges people go through where they wouldn't be able to properly provide care for a child with special needs.