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Pulling my baby out of her babysitter
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 4:45 pm
I’ve had it. My babysitter originally had 6 babies and now she has 9(!!!!). It’s impossible to watch so many babies in a healthy responsible way. How do I tell her I’m pulling out? I also don’t want to pay because she took way more kids than she said in September. How do I do this without being mean/nasty? At the end of the day she was so wrong.....
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tichellady




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 4:48 pm
You don’t want to pay for what? The babysitting she already did?
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amother




Coral
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 4:53 pm
Just tell her you're not comfortable with such a large group, so you'll be pulling out. It's not mean or nasty unless you're mean or nasty about it.
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agreer




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 4:56 pm
I think you need to pay her for all the time that your child was there, regardless of how many babies.

However, if you signed up through the summer, and now you want to quit her, just do it. Tell her directly: Chani, I really liked you, but I can't leave my baby with so many others. Our last day is Friday and I'll pay you through then.
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amother




Seashell
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 4:56 pm
You have to pay her. There's no nice way not to do so.
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amother




Pumpkin
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 4:57 pm
Did she hire help?
My sister did that. She hired one full time lady plus cleaning help part time and can have upwards of 12 babies max at any given time. She also has an agreement with her neighbir sbould the need arrise that her neighbor will step in to help out (you know, 4 babies crying and only 3 sets of hands..... ) but its been a few years and you can count on one hand the times it has happened bh.
She didn't tell all mothers when she started out how many kids she'll be taking on but there is no contract. Most kids move on and graduate to playgroup by 15-18 months.
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amother




Peach
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 4:58 pm
Just tell her the reasoning as it is. "I'm not comfortable leaving my baby with such large group, I'll be switching him." But you have to pay for when your child was there.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:08 pm
Of course I’ll pay her for the time she was there!
I meant for all the future weeks till the summer....
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Amarante




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:15 pm
You don’t have to pay her for the time you aren’t using because she isn’t providing the level of services you were promised.
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amother




Peach
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:16 pm
No, you don't have to pay her till the summer. She broke the contract, so can you.
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amother




Taupe
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:22 pm
amother [ Pumpkin ] wrote:
Did she hire help?
My sister did that. She hired one full time lady plus cleaning help part time and can have upwards of 12 babies max at any given time. She also has an agreement with her neighbir sbould the need arrise that her neighbor will step in to help out (you know, 4 babies crying and only 3 sets of hands..... ) but its been a few years and you can count on one hand the times it has happened bh.
She didn't tell all mothers when she started out how many kids she'll be taking on but there is no contract. Most kids move on and graduate to playgroup by 15-18 months.


My babysitter told me she takes a Max of 5. When I starter it was more because 2 were transitioning out. Then she wanted to add a few more (up to 7) which I was really not comfortable with. She didn't end up doing it
She has 6 in total now but 2 don't come every day and one is a few months old. She also accepts drop ins. Full time she has 2 or 3.

Some mother's ask, & the babysitter Changes her mind. Even if there's no contract, of someone wants a small group and makes that clear, it's important to follow through.
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Elfrida




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:23 pm
Was there anything in writing about how many children she would take?

Morally I don't think you have to continue to pay if she broke her word.

If you signed a written contract which states that you will pay her so much a month for taking care of your child between whatever hours, and there was nothing written anywhere about how many children she would have, you could find yourself in an awkward legal position.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:31 pm
What’s the legal ratio in NYC?
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amother




Linen
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:34 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
What’s the legal ratio in NYC?

Is she legal?
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amother




Peach
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:36 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
What’s the legal ratio in NYC?


I can't imagine she's legal if she has many kids. Did you fill out any paperwork in the beginning of the year?
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:38 pm
no I don’t thinks she’s legal Sad
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Elfrida




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 5:39 pm
Don't know about NYC specifically, but generally the recommended ratio for children under 15 months is around 1:3 or 1:4.

That is probably only relevant if she is legally registered.

Incidentally, if you do pull your child out at the of the week/month, do you have alternative childcare arrangements in place?
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notshanarishona




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 6:04 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I’ve had it. My babysitter originally had 6 babies and now she has 9(!!!!). It’s impossible to watch so many babies in a healthy responsible way. How do I tell her I’m pulling out? I also don’t want to pay because she took way more kids than she said in September. How do I do this without being mean/nasty? At the end of the day she was so wrong.....


Did you discuss before hand how many kids she would take? If yes and she changed then you have every right to withdraw your child mid year . If it wasn't discussed it's not as easy to do it without getting messy
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watergirl




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 6:14 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
no I don’t thinks she’s legal Sad

Then the ratio is meaningless for you. But if she changed what she told you, pull out and don't feel bad.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Jan 13 2020, 6:30 pm
notshanarishona wrote:
Did you discuss before hand how many kids she would take? If yes and she changed then you have every right to withdraw your child mid year . If it wasn't discussed it's not as easy to do it without getting messy


When I signed my baby up she had 6 babies. I’m pretty sure I asked if that is her max and she said yes but I don’t have it in writing. Wish I had a text....
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