Vent re making an upsherin
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Post  Mon, Feb 10 2020, 11:57 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We don't have a house and we have too much immediate family (literally our siblings and their kids) to fit into any house of a relative that we could possibly borrow. So then we're renting a shul at $350 minimum. And have to take the time slot/day of week where it's supper time.
Once it's in a shul, ppl will come and stay and eat. So now my guest list is up to 100 people who will actually eat (again JUST family that we have to invite. Haven't even invited classmates or our friends)
And then it has to be catered bc it's so much work to cook for that many ppl out of my tiny apt kitchen.
I would love to host a small, intimate and inexpensive party but I don't at all see how to make that work. I also really don't want to spend 1k on this.

Make a come & go buffet at home. No tables for people to sit around. There's enough room for people to stand. Don't feel pressured to do something you can't afford.
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Post  Tue, Feb 11 2020, 12:39 am
I know you mean well for your son to have all his cousins there, but just beware that kids that age can get overwhelmed with a crowd & it might just flop your whole event
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Post  Tue, Feb 11 2020, 8:14 am
Even in a shul you can do dessert only and keep down the costs.
For my first son I made it after supper time and let everyone know that it was dessert only. Made most of the cakes and cookies. Bought a little. Food cost was under $300
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Post  Tue, Feb 11 2020, 9:17 am
I’ve made four upsherins. The only women that came were the grandmothers . The uncles came , took a snip and made lechaim and had some cake. They took pekalach home for their kids. The grandparents are the only relatives that stayed throughout the event.
I have many nephews from both sides and I’ve never gone to an upsherin. This is one party that has gotten out of hand in some places in recent years. There is absolutely no reason why it can’t be done in your apartment for grandparents and uncles. Send the pekalach home or make a separate kid party a different day but it’s totally not necessary. There are kids celebrating at the cheder firen.
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