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Will ur son want to come to this bar mitzva?

 
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sat, Feb 15 2020, 11:27 pm
I guess I'm not with the times because I thought a weekday bar mitzvah seuda
is similar to a seuda where there is a speech and dancing with eating of course.

My son went to a few bar mitzvahs already and it seems they hired this person to
Entertain the boys and give out these light up toys...besides having a catered meal.

I already planned for my sons bar mitzvah to be on his birthday just a siyum, buffet meal, and dancing(music) with a very short speech or 2. Is anyone making bar mitzvahs like this anymore?
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amother




Coffee
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 1:49 am
Yes. The boys will have a nice time. Make your simcha your way. No need to copy or live up to anyone else.

You can get somecheap shtick for the dancing, and make a signing board if you like.
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DrMom




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 2:04 am
My son loves attending bar-mitzvahs for his friends and family members. Doesn't matter if it's plain or fancy.
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chanchy123




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 2:45 am
A bunch of the Bar mitzvahas my son ( who had his BM in December) attended were like this DS had a great time.
At his BM we had pizza, soup, and sufganiyot and brought a DJ who also played a keyboard. The kids had a great time. But DS (and I) has been to parties where the dancing music was played from a compter and family made their own playlists.
There was a pretty wide range among his friends in standards.
But standards vary by community.
In my world a party like yours is pretty standard. Kids come with little expectations.
My DS really cared about the dancing and he wanted to have an actual dj. So we did everything super simple (as I said, two pots of soup, pizza sufganiyot - no photographer, none of us but DS had new clothes, simple disposable dishes etc.) but splurged on a dj. Each family has their own budget.
We also had a nice Shabbat away with the family so we really kept the friends party simple.
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amother




Teal
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 5:03 am
Every bar mitzvah my boys went to were so different and unique.

Some were in a hall, some in a house or basement of a shul. Some had a famous singer, some had an entertainer, some had shtick ;Some had none and some had all. Some served a sit down deal, some buffet style. Some were fleshing, some dairy. One was a malava malka for the boys, pizza and bagels. Some sponsored a breakfast in school.

My son and his friends went to all.
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amother




Floralwhite
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 5:04 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I guess I'm not with the times because I thought a weekday bar mitzvah seuda
is similar to a seuda where there is a speech and dancing with eating of course.

My son went to a few bar mitzvahs already and it seems they hired this person to
Entertain the boys and give out these light up toys...besides having a catered meal.

I already planned for my sons bar mitzvah to be on his birthday just a siyum, buffet meal, and dancing(music) with a very short speech or 2. Is anyone making bar mitzvahs like this anymore?

I made a bar mitzva like this recently. My son's class said it was the best bar mitzva from the entire class (his was last).
My guess is because they didn't have to sit through long speeches and because we did buffet style they were able to fill their plates again and again instead of a waiter giving them the typical few chicken nuggets and fries with ketchup.
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amother




Lemon
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 5:39 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I guess I'm not with the times because I thought a weekday bar mitzvah seuda
is similar to a seuda where there is a speech and dancing with eating of course.

My son went to a few bar mitzvahs already and it seems they hired this person to
Entertain the boys and give out these light up toys...besides having a catered meal.

I already planned for my sons bar mitzvah to be on his birthday just a siyum, buffet meal, and dancing(music) with a very short speech or 2. Is anyone making bar mitzvahs like this anymore?


Mazel tov!
What a beautiful bar mitzvah you have planned
May you continue to have much yiddishe nachas from your bar mitzvah boy!
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amother




Cerulean
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 8:14 am
My sons are so excited to bar mitzvahs!
Company and good food!
Music and dancing!
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amother




Babyblue
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 8:36 am
If your ds feels a need to add something, order some cheap sunglasses and have someone hand them out partway through the dancing. You can also have a lively bochur relative or friend be there and know to jump in and help encourage and model for the boys as needed during the dancing. (We had a cousin and he brought a friend. As gratitude, we gave them small gift certificates to the local sefarim store.) The character of the simchah as you have it planned is not a problem at all.
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amother




Puce
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 8:37 am
We made a bar mitzvah with a klezmer band and nice food his class walked out of it I wish I had invited more family and friends instead
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amother




Apricot
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 8:42 am
Boys love dancing
If dad and others make the dancing very laybefik that’s all that’s needed
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Ema of 4




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 8:54 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I guess I'm not with the times because I thought a weekday bar mitzvah seuda
is similar to a seuda where there is a speech and dancing with eating of course.

My son went to a few bar mitzvahs already and it seems they hired this person to
Entertain the boys and give out these light up toys...besides having a catered meal.

I already planned for my sons bar mitzvah to be on his birthday just a siyum, buffet meal, and dancing(music) with a very short speech or 2. Is anyone making bar mitzvahs like this anymore?

Sounds perfect to me.....I don’t understand the need for all these lights and entertainers and....stuff....
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 10:52 am
amother [ Puce ] wrote:
We made a bar mitzvah with a klezmer band and nice food his class walked out of it I wish I had invited more family and friends instead


I'm sorry this happened to you. I'm mostly inviting his classmates bec it is his bar mitzvah after all and we need to keep it low cost so the number of ppl are limited.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 10:53 am
Thanks everyone for the replies. I will continue as planned.
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octopus




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 10:54 am
I made a bar mitzvah like this (no shtick) and it was beautiful!
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Hashem_Yaazor




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 10:58 am
My son loves going to bar mitzvos without knowing in advance the schedule and is always happy when he returns. He's going to join in the simcha with his friends or relatives and enjoys however it's manifested. Don't worry about doing anything fancy... My son's friends enjoyed our at home hot dog and fries siyum to celebrate his bar mitzvah.
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amother




Copper
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 11:00 am
What you described for your party is typical in my community. One family spent on lighting on extra fancy catering and the boys thought it was strange because no one does that.

However if where you live everybody does a DJ and everyone does lots of give aways then you may need to do something extra.
But again this is so community specific.
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