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Invitation to Bar Mitzvah - 8:30 P.M.

 
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Sweet Pea




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 5:35 pm
My DH and I received a Bar Mitzvah invitation. The start time on the invite says 8:30 P.M. I know that the Bar Mitzvah can't just be starting at 8:30 P.M. What do you think it means?
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 5:38 pm
Sweet Pea wrote:
My DH and I received a Bar Mitzvah invitation. The start time on the invite says 8:30 P.M. I know that the Bar Mitzvah can't just be starting at 8:30 P.M. What do you think it means?
why do you think it cant be starting that late? My daughterwas invited to a bat mitzvah a few weeks ago that started at 8. Yes it was late, ut not everyone starts their parties at 6 or 7.
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amother




Blonde
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 5:39 pm
It's probably just a dessert reception. .
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thunderstorm




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 5:42 pm
Sweet Pea wrote:
My DH and I received a Bar Mitzvah invitation. The start time on the invite says 8:30 P.M. I know that the Bar Mitzvah can't just be starting at 8:30 P.M. What do you think it means?

Lots of people are doing a dessert invite lately. Maybe that’s what it is. They invite immediate family only for the Seuda and everyone else for the dessert (which they usually provide a nice display of desserts).
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Sweet Pea




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 5:42 pm
The Bar Mitzvah happened already. My husband was a bit skeptical. He showed up at the appointed time and saw the party had already been going on for a while (many people were already there, dirty dishes on the table). If it was just a dessert invitation wouldn't that have been mentioned on the invitation?
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thunderstorm




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 5:49 pm
Sweet Pea wrote:
The Bar Mitzvah happened already. My husband was a bit skeptical. He showed up at the appointed time and saw the party had already been going on for a while (many people were already there, dirty dishes on the table). If it was just a dessert invitation wouldn't that have been mentioned on the invitation?
Not always. I’ve seen invitations where it specifically says that it’s for dessert but I’ve received invitations with the time and no mention that it was dessert only and it was. Some people put out regular food as well at that time , buffet style for the people that are only invited for dessert.
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asmileaday




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 6:16 pm
Sweet Pea wrote:
The Bar Mitzvah happened already. My husband was a bit skeptical. He showed up at the appointed time and saw the party had already been going on for a while (many people were already there, dirty dishes on the table). If it was just a dessert invitation wouldn't that have been mentioned on the invitation?


Most Bar Mitzvaha I've attended, at 8:30 they're just about starting. Bar Mitzvahs start late around here. But usually the invitation says 7:30 and no one shows up before an hour.
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amother




Taupe
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 7:54 pm
My in-law family starts all bar mitzvahs, vorts and sheva brachos at 8:30pm. We hate it. We end up eating dinner at home and leaving the kids with a sitter. They used to announce 7:30pm and we had to learn the hard way not to show up until 9pm otherwise we would sit around waiting for everybody to arrive. Now at least they're honest and say 8:30pm and we still know not to arrive before 9pm if we want a full crowd. We sometimes leave before the main course is served because we need to get to work the next day. This seems to be more popular in chassidish circles.
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amother




Wheat
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 8:16 pm
Where I live (NY/NJ) bar mitzvahs don't start before 9-9:15 but the invitation will say 8:00
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essie14




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 11:01 pm
In my circles that would be a dessert invitation but usually the invitation would say that.
Most bar/bat mitzvahs we go to start at 6:30-7:30.
DH has chassidish family and they would totally serve a meal at 8:30 or 9 pm.
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amother




Natural
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 11:05 pm
In my community, Bar Mitzvah's don't start before 8:30/9. Same for sheva brachos and tenoyim.
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sarlal




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 11:18 pm
people do what works for them and their families. I made a bday party for my daughter on a sat night in the winter and people gave me such grief about it! I work on sundays and so sat night is what works for my family and me. this invitation for an 8:30 start is what works for the family. maybe it's dessert? go and enjoy Smile mazel tov
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DrMom




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Feb 16 2020, 11:33 pm
Sweet Pea wrote:
The Bar Mitzvah happened already. My husband was a bit skeptical. He showed up at the appointed time and saw the party had already been going on for a while (many people were already there, dirty dishes on the table). If it was just a dessert invitation wouldn't that have been mentioned on the invitation?

I would think so. Otherwise, invitees may show up expecting dinner.
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amother




Orchid
 

Post  Mon, Feb 17 2020, 5:26 am
Sweet Pea wrote:
My DH and I received a Bar Mitzvah invitation. The start time on the invite says 8:30 P.M. I know that the Bar Mitzvah can't just be starting at 8:30 P.M. What do you think it means?


In Lakewood it may.
DHs entire family learns in kollel and we started the bar mitzvah when yeshiva ends so his family (father included )would come. We actually called it for slightly earlier so it would actually started on time. (DHs father doesn’t come for picture before)
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