Things Would Be Calmer If I Had A Better Memory

amother

Thu, Feb 20 2020, 9:24 am

Some examples

Most nights at bedtime kids try and buy extra time by complaining they are hungry/thirsty when dinner was over an hour beforehand. On the nights that I remember to ask them before the get up from the table " are you sure you are no longer hungry/thirsty? We are not eating again before bed..." this doesnt happen

I cleaned my attic for pesach. I told myself everytime the kids want to go up there im going to remind them its clean and that no snacks and drinks can be up there. Its 4 days later and I already forgot to remind them

I pack my kids bags with "fresh" lunches as soon as we are dressed in the morn. A good 45 mins before we have to leave. Yet when we are leaving someone always remembers that they needed something. Why cant I just remember to ask "are you sure you have everything you need for school?!" " I don't want to hear u forgot something when the bus is in front of the house"

Am I the only one suffering from amnesia?!?

persephonefalls

Mon, Feb 24 2020, 2:21 pm

How old are your kids? If they're school-aged, you can put some of this responsibility on them. It will take some getting used to, but you can make it a house rule: we do not eat after dinner. Then it's on them to remember to make sure to fill up at the dinner table.

My 7yo asks for a drink every. single. night. after we put him to bed. It drives me crazy, because he always asks for it, couldn't he remember to bring it up himself before he goes to bed? So eventually I told him if he wants a drink, he can be in charge of getting it himself. The first few times he pouted and begged me to go get it for him, because he was tired, but I said no, and he had to go get it himself. And now if he wants a drink before bed, he makes sure to get it himself!

Can you make a sign on the attic that says CLEANED FOR PESACH: NO FOOD UP HERE? that way, it's once again not on you to be constantly reminding them!

I have a similar memory problem! and I try to get ahead of it by making things happen when it's not crunch time. We leave literally nothing for the morning in my house--my kids have to have their backpacks prepped and choose their clothes for the next day before they go to bed. That way, they're responsible for remembering their own stuff--if they forgot it two seconds before the bus comes, next time they'll make sure to remember it earlier.

Basically, you have a lot going on and a lot to handle, so don't beat yourself up about forgetting to be the reminder police. Instead, if this keeps happening, come up with a better system so you don't have to remind them.

amother

Periwinkle

Mon, Feb 24 2020, 4:02 pm

My cell phone has about 50 reminders set- not an exaggeration. Aside from actual appointments, it reminds me to remind kids to take meds, to make lunches, etc. It also reminds me to out up the blech and hot water ling enough before Shabbos that I don't remember when I go to light candles. Very useful. Anything that doesn't have a set time, I out on a list in my notepad app and check multiple times a day. Anything I have to remind someone about whenever they do something, I don't expect to actually happen.

PinkFridge

Mon, Feb 24 2020, 4:03 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I feel your pain.
Re the attic: Can you put up a big sign? Yellow tap or something? On the attic door, stairway, wherever?
What kind of things are the kids forgetting? Did this come up in homework? If they're old enough to be responsible, maybe you can give them a pack of post its and encourage them to write themselves notes.

Hatzlacha!

amother

Floralwhite

Mon, Feb 24 2020, 4:05 pm

The above posts are amazing.
Like the poster above me, my phone is key to my organization. I wouldn’t give it up for anything. Everything is in my notepad, calendar, reminders, alarms, and other apps. I just don’t have the organizational skills to live the life I’m living without depending on it heavily. BH it works.