Humor | Imamother

amother

Mustard

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 1:39 pm

malki2 wrote:

Instead of trying to find toilet paper, we’re stocking up on Matza which will basically alleviate the need for toilet paper altogether.

And at this rate matzoh shmurah, is much cheaper.
Who woulda thunk?

ora_43

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 4:58 pm

(another from Facebook, this one posted by Ro'I Kehat.)

(background: Israel just banned gatherings of more than 10 people)

Two Jews come to a shul and find it's empty.

The first one says: What should we do?

The second says: What's the problem? Me and you, you and me, plus the two of us together - that's 6. You do the same calculation, and then we'll be 12. So the two of us need to go home, because we can't have more than 10 people in one place.

chocolatine

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 5:17 pm

Hadar, Gefen, Osem announced that due to the situation they will have to release the “געבאקען נאך פסח״ “ stock

Goldgold

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 5:22 pm

The real reason Israel bans a gathering of more than 10 is because they are afraid of a new government arising!

shanie5

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 6:02 pm

Snow white is down to 6 dwarves. Sneezy is in quarantine.

imasinger

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 6:03 pm

librarygirl wrote:

https://I.imgur.com/gQxQ8JW.jpg

One way to do it! What a story for the grandchildren. (For those who can't access, it's a news story about a wedding. Since gatherings above 10 are forbidden in EY, but 100 is the max for a grocery store, this couple got married in the vegetable aisle.

amother

Pumpkin

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 6:13 pm

ALERT!!!! The corana virus can be spread through money. If you have any money at home, put on some gloves, put all the money in a plastic bag and put it outside the front door tonight I'm collecting all the plastic bags for safety Think of your health

amother

Pumpkin

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 6:16 pm

MESSAGE FROM THE PIZZA SHOP!!!! For all those complaining about the change of the taste in the shawarma and falafel balls. I'ts due to the workers washing their hands we hope to resume the original taste shortly

the world's best mom

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 6:17 pm

Day 2 without sports. I found a woman sitting on my couch. Apparently, she's my wife. She seems nice.

amother

Salmon

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 6:29 pm

I’m not sure what will kill me first. Corona or being home with my family 2 weeks straight.

amother

Pumpkin

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 6:36 pm

How come the liquor stores don't have empty shelves? are people not realizing they will be quarantined with their spouses and kids!!!!

malki2

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 6:43 pm

Quarantine: When your husband learns the names of all of the kids.

amother

Orchid

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 6:57 pm

I just walked into the bathroom to find my toddler unrolling the toilet paper roll right into the toilet... What's wrong with her?? doesn't she know how valuable it is!?

jewwoman

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 7:07 pm

Wow I really needed that. Suddenly started panicking a bit. Here in the uk our government is not taking it seriously enough and I Just needed some humour. Keep them up please

Shabbosiscoming

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 7:10 pm

Your grandparents were called to war. You're being called to sit on your couch. You can do this.

amother

Coral

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 7:25 pm

Shabbosiscoming wrote:

Your grandparents were called to war. You're being called to sit on your couch. You can do this.

Not a good comparison. Many of them died.

Jewishfoodie

Sun, Mar 15 2020, 7:26 pm

amother [ Coral ] wrote:

Not a good comparison. Many of them died.