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Forum -> Coronavirus Health Questions
Neighbor is angry at me



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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 3:49 pm
I live in a building of 20 family, 10 have young children. My next door neighbor has a children who are similar age to my children and they are good friends.
I'm trying to keep my kids away from everyone as the virus is spreading alot where I live. We mainly stay inside but twice a day a allow them out since we live in a small apartment and it's very hard.
One of the times is just in our hallway - we have a big hallway and I have the kids race and ect... For around 5-10 minutes when no one is there (they know know no touching anything and wash their hands after.... Not perfect I know but they really need to move around alittle), the other time we go out they take scooters and go to an empty lot 2 blocks away and they scooter for 1/2 hour.
Anyways sometimes when my neighbors kids hear my kids go out they come out too. It's fine (the hallway belongs to all off us) but I quickly take my kids inside.
My neighbor is upset about this, says we are in the same building anyways so chances are we both catch it. Plus the other neighbors play together. In addition Dh can bring it home anyways (he's the manager of a grocery - he doesn't want to go to work, but is needed if people want food.... So just does his best to stay safe) .she seems to be taking it personally that I make my kids leave every time her kids come out and is making me feel bad. I feel bad making her upset Does she have a point at all?
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iyar




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 4:02 pm
She has no point at all.
Unfortunately a lot of people thought this was a hoax, a flu, a lot of nonsense. Some people still are not taking this seriously.
You can't educate your neighbor. You can do what you're supposed to do, which is what you're doing. Hope you and your family stay safe and well.
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Busy as a bee




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 4:03 pm
Oh my goodness I could have written your post except the person whos upset at me is my sister in law who told me that if I dont want her kids to come play (cuz we're both full time working through this) and I still come for pesach to my in laws I'm a hypocrite.

You just need to do what you feel comfortable with and what makes you feel safe. This is a crazy world we live in and honestly ask any expert/medical professional and she is in the wrong.

Stay strong and hatzlacha!
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 4:11 pm
You are doing perfect. Kol hakavod to you.
The only thing you can do is empathize.
Call her and say how hard it is for you and your kids and that you wish they could play together. Tell her that your kids ask for hers and it breaks your heart to have to tell them no, but you need to, for the safety of everyone and in compliance with the Rav/township....
Let her know that others may feel that you are being overly cautious, but you have to your histadlut to be safe and contribute to the safety of the kahal, and especially being DH works at a grocery, it is even more incumbent on you to not spread something if CVS it is in your house.
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yersp




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 4:36 pm
I would do the same if I lived in an apt building like you.
Yes, maybe your kids might catch it, but at least you know you did yours and you did the best you could under the circumstances unlike that neighbor of yours (or the sil of the other poster).
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rachel6543




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 4:55 pm
Nope, you’re doing the right thing. Keep your distance. Stay safe & healthy!
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amother
Scarlet


 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 5:19 pm
Busy as a bee wrote:
Oh my goodness I could have written your post except the person whos upset at me is my sister in law who told me that if I dont want her kids to come play (cuz we're both full time working through this) and I still come for pesach to my in laws I'm a hypocrite.

You just need to do what you feel comfortable with and what makes you feel safe. This is a crazy world we live in and honestly ask any expert/medical professional and she is in the wrong.

Stay strong and hatzlacha!


You are right to not allow them to play.
Your in-laws may decide to self isolate, it might be a good idea to start thinking along the lines of not visiting them. As hard as that sounds, it might be the right thing to do. Sad
I don't think I want my parents to come to us for Pesach, even if we are all still self isolated.
This really is a crazy time, but we need to try to allow ourselves to be flexible about so many things that have always been a given.
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 5:22 pm
So sorry. You are right. She will probably realise she is wrong soon enough if it makes you feel better.
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amother
Black


 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 6:13 pm
I don't think you are right. Mental and emotional health also counts. I can't forsee being able to keep kids cooped up so many days in a small apartment like that. Right now I am allowing my kids to play with neighbors. I only have a few neighbors. It is what it is. Not planning on visiting any elderly ppl or immunocompromised ppl in the foreseeable future.
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amother
Violet


 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 6:16 pm
amother [ Black ] wrote:
I don't think you are right. Mental and emotional health also counts. I can't forsee being able to keep kids cooped up so many days in a small apartment like that. Right now I am allowing my kids to play with neighbors. I only have a few neighbors. It is what it is. Not planning on visiting any elderly ppl or immunocompromised ppl in the foreseeable future.


But you can’t make that decision for your neighbor’s children. She has every right to keep them away if she wants.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 6:19 pm
OP, I agree with you. Your neighbor doesn't realize it right now, but you are doing this for the safety of HER family, just as much as you are doing it for your own.

Kol hakavod, it is hard having energetic kids cooped up in a small space. It sounds like you are working extra hard to make the best of things.

It's midnight here, and if it wasn't raining outside I'd take my dog out for a walk. It's too bad you can't take the kids to the park in the middle of the night, when they'll have it all to themselves.
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amother
Black


 

Post Tue, Mar 17 2020, 6:20 pm
amother [ Violet ] wrote:
But you can’t make that decision for your neighbor’s children. She has every right to keep them away if she wants.


Of course. The neighbor should respect her wishes.
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