How do you feel about your name? Common vs unique

amother

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 6:57 am

If you have a common name, how do you feel about that? Was it hard to have other kids in your class or block with that name? Do you have a middle name or nickname to make it more unique? Did it not bother you at all? Do you have cousins with the same name?

If you had a less common name, how did you feel about that? What feedback did you get?

My name is super uncommon. I've only met 1 other person with my name (although I have heard of a couple others.) It was hard for me, especially since I'm from a BT background and later became more yeshivish. I liked being unique, but I wished it was a DROP more accepted of a name. I was embarrassed by mispronouncing, questions about the origins if my names, etc.

I'm thinking of baby names for my little girl now and hoping for something that is undeniably mainstream but still not overly common. Accepting suggestions!

amother

Coral

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 7:01 am

My English name is uncommon people aske me if that’s my last name when I tell them my name
People call me by my wrong name
My parents got the name out of a baby book
My kids have common names and one middle name that’s unusual yakira

Rappel

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 7:04 am

I like that I'm named after a "common" historical figure. I identify very deeply with her. It never bothered me that there were always 3 or 4 of us around wherever I went. There was a time that I changed the spelling to make sure that everyone pronounced it a certain way, but that was more "teenager in general society", not a rebellion against my name.

I do have a second name, and a third name, actually. I've never used them in my LIFE, and I find it very burdensome that I not only don't identify with these names, but that they're on every legal document that I own, every state test. So, advice: if you do name your daughter more than one name, please make sure it's not a mouthful.

amother

Mustard

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 7:08 am

I have a very uncommon name, though I grew up with one other person who had the same name. I hated it in America, nobody could pronounce it, no matter how hard they tried.

I moved to e"y and my name is perfect here. Unique enough that there aren't a million, common enough that nobody thinks twice or gives me weird looks... But everyone here thinks I'm a BT and I chose it!

amother

Orange

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 7:10 am

I'll go anon
My first name is Sara - there were tons of other Saras in school, camp, etc. It was sometimes annoying but I was always very popular and in most situations I was called Sara [[Lastname]] all the time to differentiate between all of us.
Never annoyed me. But I always knew I didn't want to name my kids regular, typical names.

My children have VERY unique names but nothing weird. We always get comments like "Wow, what a beautiful name" when we introduce our children to people.

amother

Mistyrose

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 8:20 am

I have 2 names. Name #1 is yuck. I would not name my child this name. Name #2 is gorgeous. My mother added the name in the Hope's of calling me Name #2. My father didnt let, so here I am going by Name #1. Yay.

I always hated my name, so in second grade I decided my name was Name #2. At attendance on the first day, the teacher calls "Name #1 LastName?" And I go "no it's Name #2", and no one stopped me lol. So I was Name #2 until parent teacher conferences when my parents were like "hi we are Name #1's parents" and the teacher is like "huh who dat?"

LOL

amother

Scarlet

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 8:44 am

I have many names, two are legal and hebrew and two are jewish and yiddish. A compromise from my parents. My father and no one else (besides his parents, but they died when I was young) calls me by my yiddish name. My mother called me by my second legal name and everyone else calls me by my first legal name. So, for the question, I actually like my second legal name the best, but I don’t want anyone calling me that because it was special for my mother. I don’t like my yiddish names, but only my father calls me that and like my kids say, half the time it doesn’t even sound like the actual name. Some of my nieces like to annoy me by calling me by that name, but they do it to get back at me with something with their names. Don’t worry, all in good fun! As far as the name that everyone knows me as, no, I don’t like it! It’s not common, but not uncommon either in jewish circles. Actually one of my nieces named her daughter that too. Whenever I tell a non jew or not frum person, they love it. Maybe I don’t like it because I’m tired of hearing it Very Happy

. I should also be tired of mommy LOL

amother

Sapphire

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 9:04 am

I love my name. The first time I met another Naomi was in elementary school. I was the only Naomi in my high school. I also really like my middle name, Leah, which seems like everybody on the planet’s middle name too. If it wasn’t my middle name I would have strongly considered naming a child Leah as a first name.

amother

Lime

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 9:11 am

My English name (which I went by when I lived in the US) is very uncommon, and my Hebrew name (which I go by in Israel) is very common.

I have no preference for common vs uncommon. The disadvantage with my English name is that people often pronounce it wrong which I don't like. The disadvantage of my Hebrew name is that even though it's super common, it's a bit "old-ladyish" and I am young.

So I am completely neutral about common vs uncommon.

Chayalle

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 9:20 am

My mother had a very uncommon (yiddish) name and was made fun of as a child. She named all of us common names (like Sara, Rivka, Rochel, Leah type names) so we'd blend in.

My name is pretty common, and I'm comfortable with it. I named my kids names that fit in as well, and they like their names. One of my DD's is less common than the others - not biblical - but it's pretty and common enough, and is a Hebrew translation of a yiddish name. She has told me several times that she likes her name and is glad I named her the Hebrew version, as it works well in our circles.

amother

Ecru

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 9:22 am

amother [ Sapphire ] wrote:

Naomi is my favorite name. So is Rachel even though it’s more common. Love Rachel leah.

I never minded having a common name. It’s classic and timeless. Only ever had one other girl with the same name in class or camp and we usually pronounced differently.

amother

Black

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 9:22 am

amother [ Sapphire ] wrote:

In the grade above me in school, there were seven girls named Leah. They took snapshots of their heads and put them in a page in the yearbook, entitled "seven leah cake".....

amother

Slategray

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 9:26 am

My name is Rebecca. I like it, but (maybe other Rebeccas and Rachels can attest to this) it seems to always get mixed up for Rachel, as if the two are interchangeable. I do like that no one can really say anything bad about my name. It isn't polarizing or controversial. On the flip side, no one can really say it's jaw-droppingly unique and amazing, but that's okay, too. I'm glad my parents went the safer route.

I'm going to want to give my children something less common than mine, but not anything where they're the only person that anyone has ever known with that name. A good middle balance!

amother

Firebrick

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 9:32 am

My name is not common and even less common in my specific circles since my parents shifted hashkafos a bit and I shifted a bit more. It also has no source and no one really knows what it means. I literally cringe every time I see a thread asking for unusual names I would never do that to my child. All my kids have relatively common names but surprisingly so far all of them are the only ones with their name in their class.

amother

Rose

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 10:12 am

Awww I'd love some more examples, but I'll probably make a thread when I find out the gender of my baby Smile

I have a pretty common biblical name but it's a pretty name and I like it, and it's also very universal I get asked if I'm Jewish, Spanish, Greek, etc. I had one girl in my pre school and elementary class sharing my name, I never saw it as an issue. In high school I had a girl with a shared name but she went by a very different nickname.
My daughter has a more unusual name as I wanted something universal that would still work in like a local Bais Yakov, and my husband and I both loved the idea. Older generation in my family, not so much (they didn't tell us anything directly, but we heard back after).
Now we're expecting our second and I can't think of any other names I'd love as much as my first. Husband kind of wants us to name after someone in either of our families because he's kind of a people pleaser but the boys option we have is a absolutely ugly name (and a double ugly name at that) and the girls names while not ugly, are not super appealing to me.
Anyway, waiting to find out gender in a few weeks, will deal with it then.

amother

Amethyst

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 10:15 am

I feel a sense of irony about my Hebrew and English names.

I was named after my great grandmother Hannah/Chana. When I was born this was considered to be a VERY old fashioned name so my legal English name is Helen.

At some point Hannah/Channa became widely popular and Helen became a name that is completely out of fashion and associated with little old ladies of a certain age.

So my parents could have just named me Hannah/Chana and I would have been on trend and been one of thousands of millennials with that name instead of being almost the only Helen and having people think I am a gray haired Bubbe. LOL

amother

Chartreuse

Mon, Apr 13 2020, 11:09 am

I have a fairly common name and no middle name. My name never bothered me, but the lack of a middle name always did! There was one other girl in my circle of friends who had the same first name but she had a middle name so she ended up being both of her names and I was ‘plain’ first name.

My children are named after family members. Each of them has one name that is unusual in our circles (but fairly common in other circles) and one that is common (the order determined by which way sounded better to us). We found (my DH had seen this with friends before we did it) that when a child knows who he is named for & is taught about the good qualities of that person, they can be proud of their name. Right now our kids are very makpid to use both of their names and they won’t answer (except at doctors’ offices 😉) if you only use one. We would/will be fine if they decide at any time to use only one of their names (that’s why we gave 2).

I know your question wasn’t about naming after someone, but I think my story still has what to offer:

1) if you feel a strong connection to a name, and can express that connection to your child, they can be proud of even an unusual name.

2) if you are giving an unusual name, consider giving a second (of first) name that is more common and calling the child both, with the clear understanding that you will be fine if they choose to only go by (either) one of the names.