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Forum
-> Coronavirus Health Questions
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amother
Linen
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 Sun, May 03 2020, 6:26 pm
| amother [ Pink ] wrote: | | I work in one of "those" NYC hospitals. I asked the very same questions at the timw. How it was ethical to accept patients without adequate staff. The answer I was given was that EDs have a legal obligation to accept anyone who shows up. The ship was only accepting pts with vwry strict criteria and the many critically ill pts did not meet thise criteria. It was devastating to us providers to observe the level of care that was available at that time. We didnt go into medicine to rush from roomm to room dealing with way too many pts than humanly possible. Such is the situatiom during an emergency pandemic and I do understand the need for patients and families to try and assign blame, but it is misguided. |
I think we need a colorful banners running through all these threads, because I see our wonderful nurses cant read through every post so they miss what has veen posted every single time. We are not blaming the floor nurses. The mismanagement is not their fault. Its the fault of those who should be on top of the nurses, making sure they can do their jobs, trying to alleviate their workload by maybe thinking out of the box (like hello letting someone safe check on them or something) The reason 'some' nurses feel safe to act like the jerk they are is because there is no cheshbon, no management, no one to answer to, its each person with his conscience. Like a society with no judgment, this can't work. Unfortunately there are several selfish people for every selfless one.
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Reality
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Sun, May 03 2020, 6:26 pm
| amother [ Pink ] wrote: | | I work in one of "those" NYC hospitals. I asked the very same questions at the timw. How it was ethical to accept patients without adequate staff. The answer I was given was that EDs have a legal obligation to accept anyone who shows up. The ship was only accepting pts with vwry strict criteria and the many critically ill pts did not meet thise criteria. It was devastating to us providers to observe the level of care that was available at that time. We didnt go into medicine to rush from roomm to room dealing with way too many pts than humanly possible. Such is the situatiom during an emergency pandemic and I do understand the need for patients and families to try and assign blame, but it is misguided. |
Thank you amother! I really appreciate you putting in the time to answer my question!
I wish you continued good health and the strength to continue your hard work!!
I will say that I disagree with the hospital protocal to keep on accepting patients that they can't treat properly. That is wrong.
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amother
Lawngreen
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Sun, May 03 2020, 6:33 pm
| crust wrote: | Did you read about the nursing home that had more than 90 deaths?
Do you think these seniors even entered the hospital?
The nursing home gave all different excuses for these deaths to cover up their incompetence of protecting their residents.
I'll post a link to the article if I find it |
No need to post a link, I'm an RN in a nursing home myself. The nursing home was overwhelmed for a similar reason - not enough resources and staff on hand to manage the number of sick patients. When it hit the nursing home, so many of the staff became ill as well. We ended up having to work with a skeleton staff, with so many of the residents needing extra attention at the very same time. It was a recipe for a disaster.
So many of these seniors are DNRs, so those would have never been sent to the hospitals regardless. But yet they still need extra care to be treated and be made comfortable, and in so many cases be there for them when they pass since families were not allowed in.
Do you have any idea how nurses who on the average care for 15 patients, suddenly had to bear loads of 30-40 patients each, with many needing critical care? Are you aware of how many of the staff had to pull double and triple shifts, because there was no one available to relieve them. Are you aware of how many other staff members jumped into action to try to lend a hand? Therapy workers came up to the floors and took the jobs of aides to change positions and clean them up. Kitchen workers went around trying to feed as many patients as they can. Administrative workers working overtime, trying to arrange and rearrange all units to keep an isolation unit intact. It was continuous chaos with everyone scrambling to do what they can, in an attempt to save as many lives as possible. All those ongoing, while having to keep your emotions in check when watching so many vulnerable just literally die in front of your eyes, all alone and helpless.
And then the people sitting idly and safely in their own homes, watching from the sidelines, have the audacity to sling out negative comments left and right. Incompetence - neglect.. Do you have any idea what went on on the inside behind the scenes, before you casually throw comments around?
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amother
Linen
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Sun, May 03 2020, 6:43 pm
| amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote: |
And then the people sitting idly and safely in their own homes, watching from the sidelines, have the audacity to sling out negative comments left and right. Incompetence - neglect.. Do you have any idea what went on on the inside behind the scenes, before you casually throw comments around? |
Should we rename the thread or just c/p this and paste on every thread after every post..?
We are blaming the management! Tell me what they have done to make this situation a bit more bearable! From the moment they heard there's this crazy virus coming to town 2 months ago... have they made some changes/improvements, besides for hiding in a hole , saying no one can come inside, no one can sue, etc. They are the shameful rats we are enraged at. The nurses are killing themselves, and yet theres not much to show for it, because everythings been mismanaged from the get go? The hospitals weren't the greatest even before the virus, but now it seems they took a turn for the worse, and that's taking the whole fiasco into the equation. There are some in the system who are rats, perhaps greedy or lazy, and the patients as well as the faculty are all suffering because of them.
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crust
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Sun, May 03 2020, 6:45 pm
| amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote: | No need to post a link, I'm an RN in a nursing home myself. The nursing home was overwhelmed for a similar reason - not enough resources and staff on hand to manage the number of sick patients. When it hit the nursing home, so many of the staff became ill as well. We ended up having to work with a skeleton staff, with so many of the residents needing extra attention at the very same time. It was a recipe for a disaster.
So many of these seniors are DNRs, so those would have never been sent to the hospitals regardless. But yet they still need extra care to be treated and be made comfortable, and in so many cases be there for them when they pass since families were not allowed in.
Do you have any idea how nurses who on the average care for 15 patients, suddenly had to bear loads of 30-40 patients each, with many needing critical care? Are you aware of how many of the staff had to pull double and triple shifts, because there was no one available to relieve them. Are you aware of how many other staff members jumped into action to try to lend a hand? Therapy workers came up to the floors and took the jobs of aides to change positions and clean them up. Kitchen workers went around trying to feed as many patients as they can. Administrative workers working overtime, trying to arrange and rearrange all units to keep an isolation unit intact. It was continuous chaos with everyone scrambling to do what they can, in an attempt to save as many lives as possible. All those ongoing, while having to keep your emotions in check when watching so many vulnerable just literally die in front of your eyes, all alone and helpless.
And then the people sitting idly and safely in their own homes, watching from the sidelines, have the audacity to sling out negative comments left and right. Incompetence - neglect.. Do you have any idea what went on on the inside behind the scenes, before you casually throw comments around? |
Casual? Throwing around? Audacity? Sling out? Negative comments?
What?
I was responding to the post which said that because people weren't quarantined it caused an overwhelm in hospitals.
I was trying to point out that many sick people never reached the hospital.
And, the point that I really wanted to make was that, in hospitals that were not overwhelmed, patients were neglected too.
I know this first hand.
I am not really intrested in posting publically what I know. If you're interested you can pm me.
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amother
Linen
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Sun, May 03 2020, 6:50 pm
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And the elected clowns in politics aren't so helpful either. Between their changing the rules every few days from go to the theater to dont wear a mask to wear a mask or I arrest you... what have they done to save even 1 life? When people were trying to set up a makeshift hospital to alleviate the situation they came with all these knuckleheaded reason to abort it. Of course, because they haven't done all the testing and stuff that the idiots who shall remain nameless have passed several decades ago and were now free to do as they wish... oy is this what it feels like to have your hands tied while your loved ones are deported? Dont you dare call us idle when we'd all run to the hospitals in the blink of an eye and do ANYTHING to try to help this out of hand situation 😒
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amother
Lawngreen
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:03 pm
| crust wrote: | Casual? Throwing around? Audacity? Sling out? Negative comments?
What?
I was responding to the post which said that because people weren't quarantined it caused an overwhelm in hospitals.
I was trying to point out that many sick people never reached the hospital.
And, the point that I really wanted to make was that, in hospitals that were not overwhelmed, patients were neglected too.
I know this first hand.
I am not really intrested in posting publically what I know. If you're interested you can pm me. |
One point doesn't negate the other. The hospitals were overwhelmed because people weren't quarantined (either not listening to the rules, or quarantining too late). And a nursing home is another medical facility. All medical facilities were overwhelmed because of similar reasons. The nursing homes weren't quarantined in time, since there was no directive to do so. By the time they shut down, it was too late for many of them.
The nursing homes didn't send their sick (DNR patients) for treatment, because the hospitals were too overwhelmed to receive them. That's one of the reasons why many of the sick didn't make it to the hospitals.
And unless you were a patient yourself, you cannot know it first-hand. I'm not denying there weren't cases of neglect in the hospitals, but there's a line between what constitutes neglect and what is just pitiful treatment. With all this outcry, we have a lots of people who received pitiful treatment jumping on the bandwagon of neglect and embellishing parts of their stories to fit the bill. Also, there is also two different perspectives to every story. For example, one patient refused to eat no matter how much we encouraged him to do so. He had no appetite, was a bit delirious, and screamed bloody murder when we tried to feed him. When he turned a corner and started feeling better, he accused us of not feeding him. He had no recollection of his behavior and he had a significant drop in his weight to prove his claim.
For the true cases of neglect, albeit avoidable neglect, those should definitely be investigated. But these outcries of accusations from those unaffected who are just jumping onto the bandwagon to chime in with others, only reduces the voice of those affected.
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amother
Pink
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:08 pm
| amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote: | One point doesn't negate the other. The hospitals were overwhelmed because people weren't quarantined (either not listening to the rules, or quarantining too late). And a nursing home is another medical facility. All medical facilities were overwhelmed because of similar reasons. The nursing homes weren't quarantined in time, since there was no directive to do so. By the time they shut down, it was too late for many of them.
The nursing homes didn't send their sick (DNR patients) for treatment, because the hospitals were too overwhelmed to receive them. That's one of the reasons why many of the sick didn't make it to the hospitals.
And unless you were a patient yourself, you cannot know it first-hand. I'm not denying there weren't cases of neglect in the hospitals, but there's a line between what constitutes neglect and what is just pitiful treatment. With all this outcry, we have a lots of people who received pitiful treatment jumping on the bandwagon of neglect and embellishing parts of their stories to fit the bill. Also, there is also two different perspectives to every story. For example, one patient refused to eat no matter how much we encouraged him to do so. He had no appetite, was a bit delirious, and screamed bloody murder when we tried to feed him. When he turned a corner and started feeling better, he accused us of not feeding him. He had no recollection of his behavior and he had a significant drop in his weight to prove his claim.
For the true cases of neglect, albeit avoidable neglect, those should definitely be investigated. But these outcries of accusations from those unaffected who are just jumping onto the bandwagon to chime in with others, only reduces the voice of those affected. |
How do I double triple like this
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amother
Lawngreen
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:10 pm
| amother [ Linen ] wrote: | Should we rename the thread or just c/p this and paste on every thread after every post..?
We are blaming the management! Tell me what they have done to make this situation a bit more bearable! From the moment they heard there's this crazy virus coming to town 2 months ago... have they made some changes/improvements, besides for hiding in a hole , saying no one can come inside, no one can sue, etc. They are the shameful rats we are enraged at. The nurses are killing themselves, and yet theres not much to show for it, because everythings been mismanaged from the get go? The hospitals weren't the greatest even before the virus, but now it seems they took a turn for the worse, and that's taking the whole fiasco into the equation. There are some in the system who are rats, perhaps greedy or lazy, and the patients as well as the faculty are all suffering because of them. |
Why blame the management? They were dealing with a totally unknown situation, never before encountered, with no clear directive how to proceed. Guidances, instructions and directives were all over the place, and they struggled along with everyone else to figure out what was what needed to be done.
I understand the need to find blame in this awful situation. It makes one feel better, if we can find a culprit to point a finger at. But bottom line, the entire world was woefully unprepared for this situation. Everyone was guessing what the best course of action was, and even till today, we still don't know what was the best course of action. I fervently believe, that almost everyone tried to do their best, based on what situation presented itself on that particular day. It's just that the results didn't match the efforts put in.
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crust
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:11 pm
| amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote: | One point doesn't negate the other. The hospitals were overwhelmed because people weren't quarantined (either not listening to the rules, or quarantining too late). And a nursing home is another medical facility. All medical facilities were overwhelmed because of similar reasons. The nursing homes weren't quarantined in time, since there was no directive to do so. By the time they shut down, it was too late for many of them.
The nursing homes didn't send their sick (DNR patients) for treatment, because the hospitals were too overwhelmed to receive them. That's one of the reasons why many of the sick didn't make it to the hospitals.
And unless you were a patient yourself, you cannot know it first-hand. I'm not denying there weren't cases of neglect in the hospitals, but there's a line between what constitutes neglect and what is just pitiful treatment. With all this outcry, we have a lots of people who received pitiful treatment jumping on the bandwagon of neglect and embellishing parts of their stories to fit the bill. Also, there is also two different perspectives to every story. For example, one patient refused to eat no matter how much we encouraged him to do so. He had no appetite, was a bit delirious, and screamed bloody murder when we tried to feed him. When he turned a corner and started feeling better, he accused us of not feeding him. He had no recollection of his behavior and he had a significant drop in his weight to prove his claim.
For the true cases of neglect, albeit avoidable neglect, those should definitely be investigated. But these outcries of accusations from those unaffected who are just jumping onto the bandwagon to chime in with others, only reduces the voice of those affected. |
So, unless I was the patient myself...
What if said patient isn't here to tell the tale?
I posted with my SN so I'm not going to elaborate.
Please know that I do appreciate the healthcare workers. I am not blaming anyone.
The bolded words are painful. It is the reason I rejoined this thread.
Thankfully, I dont have to prove myself to anonymous posters on imamother.
Thankfully, we know that every person was destined an amount of years and after that, no nurse no hospital no quality care, nothing will help.
I dont like it but It was meant to be.
Thanks for everything you are doing. I appreciate your hard work. I can't even imagine what a day out there looks like.
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amother
Lawngreen
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:22 pm
| crust wrote: | So, unless I was the patient myself...
What if said patient isn't here to tell the tale?
I posted with my SN so I'm not going to elaborate.
Please know that I do appreciate the healthcare workers. I am not blaming anyone.
The bolded words are painful. It is the reason I rejoined this thread.
Thankfully, I dont have to prove myself to anonymous posters on imamother.
Thankfully, we know that every person was destined an amount of years and after that, no nurse no hospital no quality care, nothing will help.
I dont like it but It was meant to be.
Thanks for everything you are doing. I appreciate your hard work. I can't even imagine what a day out there looks like. |
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. And I don't want to belabor the point. But 'knowing' it first-hand means you experienced yourself. Hearing it from a first hand source is a step down from that. And like I said above, sometimes (and I stress sometimes, because other times it is true) a perspective from sick patient is skewed because of the state he was during his illness.
Regardless, that's just inconsequential at the moment. If we want the voices of those truly affected to be heard, the whole bandwagon movement needs to be curtailed. If you'll have questionable stories being tagged along, it will destroy the credibility of the rest.
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pause
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:23 pm
| crust wrote: | So, unless I was the patient myself...
What if said patient isn't here to tell the tale?
I posted with my SN so I'm not going to elaborate.
Please know that I do appreciate the healthcare workers. I am not blaming anyone.
The bolded words are painful. It is the reason I rejoined this thread.
Thankfully, I dont have to prove myself to anonymous posters on imamother.
Thankfully, we know that every person was destined an amount of years and after that, no nurse no hospital no quality care, nothing will help.
I dont like it but It was meant to be.
Thanks for everything you are doing. I appreciate your hard work. I can't even imagine what a day out there looks like. |
I warned you, didn't I? 
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amother
Pink
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:25 pm
| amother [ Linen ] wrote: | | I think we need a colorful banners running through all these threads, because I see our wonderful nurses cant read through every post so they miss what has veen posted every single time. We are not blaming the floor nurses. The mismanagement is not their fault. Its the fault of those who should be on top of the nurses, making sure they can do their jobs, trying to alleviate their workload by maybe thinking out of the box (like hello letting someone safe check on them or something) The reason 'some' nurses feel safe to act like the jerk they are is because there is no cheshbon, no management, no one to answer to, its each person with his conscience. Like a society with no judgment, this can't work. Unfortunately there are several selfish people for every selfless one. |
No banners needed nor is there a reason to seek someone to blame. Can you accept that this pandemic surprused everyone with its rapidity and virulence and ease of transmission? The situation was the same in every facility ir at least the many that I personally heard from rns and nps working there. Go all the way up and blame Trump or the WHO or China if it makes you feel better. But practicing acceptance and working to flatten the curve might make more sense. Unless you know of a better way to help curb transmission
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pause
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:25 pm
| pause wrote: | | No, of course it doesn't count. You have no proof because you weren't there. [/sarcasm] |
Not so sarcastic, it seems.
It's really really upsetting to those of us who have lost loved ones and can't "prove" it because they're dead.
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amother
Pink
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:27 pm
| pause wrote: | Not so sarcastic, it seems.
It's really really upsetting to those of us who have lost loved ones and can't "prove" it because they're dead. |
Why do you have this burning need to assign blame instead of acceptance of this terrible pandemic?
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pause
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:35 pm
I did some research to find "proof."
Here are the numbers of per capita deaths of all countries:https://www.businessinsider.co.....020-4
With Spain topping the list of 38 deaths per 100,000 people.
A quick google search tells me that in 2019 there were 19.45 million people living in NYS.
Another quick search tells me that 18909 people died from coronavirus in NYS.
Do the math yourself. When I do it, it comes out approximately 95 deaths per 100,000.
Totally and utterly inexcusable.
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cbsp
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:40 pm
Is this first hand enough?
It was posted on LinkedIn one week ago by the author's colleague:
https://www.linkedin.com/posts.....-TNZM
(the formatting got lost in the copy /paste)
Mom survived COVID-19 but died of hopelessness, all alone.
This is an open letter to Governor Cuomo, President Trump, the medical community, or anyone else
who cares:
My siblings and I are now sitting shiva for mom. Mom survived COVID-19 but died of hopelessness, all
alone. We are not bitter about it and we’re not here to point fingers at anyone. We believe that mom’s
passing was the will of God and we fully accept it. We would like to publicize this letter simply to let the
world know what’s going on in hospitals in the hopes that it brings about change, fast, so that more
needless deaths can be avoided.
Mom was 62 and had underlying medical issues. She fought like a tiger and survived many medical
battles. She was full of life and full of hope. She was there for others and was a source of hope to many.
Despite being quarantined for several weeks, mom woke up with a fever on Friday, March 27, and was
advised by her doctor to report immediately to the nearest emergency room. Despite mom being very
forlorn due to the chaos around her in the hospital, we were still able to communicate with her via her
cellphone. She was very weak, but we stayed in touch. By Monday, March 30, her breathing regressed
and she needed to be intubated and placed on a ventilator. She stayed on the ventilator for 18 long
days, and finally on April 16 we received the great news that she was removed from the ventilator.
Mom continued her progress and after a few days she was able to communicate with us verbally. Not
more than a word or two, but we heard her voice, and more importantly she heard ours. We had sent
the hospital a device to be clipped on her bed which would allow us to see mom the whole time and talk
to her.
The plan was a good one. We would continue being with mom virtually through the device and keep on
injecting her with care and hope, while we would stay in touch with the nurses (and bring them
chocolate) on a daily basis.
But the plan didn’t work out.
The device was on the hospital’s Guest WiFi which kept on refreshing and kicking off devices, and we
were advised that we cannot connect to the hospital’s more stable internal WiFi. We had lost contact
with mom. Then mom stepped off the ICU and now only had a nurse in her room once every hour or
two! We were then advised that mom is no longer communicating verbally but she still communicates
with her eyes. Mom was regressing.
On Wednesday, April 22, I spoke with the hospital social worker and said quite frankly that if this keeps
up mom will not make it. While based on the charts, mom was “progressing”, I knew that given her
underlying medical issues her secret to survival was the joy of her family (3 children, 18 grandchildren,
and 1 great grandchild). Without being in touch with her family, hopelessness would set in which would
aggravate her underlying medical issues.
I pleaded with the social worker to give mom the therapies she
needs in order for the NG tube to be removed so that we could transfer her to a high care nursing
facility or even home with a nursing aide. I pleaded with the nurses to reconnect the device so that we
could have some kind of human connection with mom. I sent a text to the hospital liaison
saying “Compassion please. My mother is laying like rag and a nurse goes in only every hour and a
half.”
Later that night I started hitting the redial button to the nurses’ station. I had sent in a MiFi card (again,
with chocolate) and begged them to reconnect the device so that I can talk to mom. It took many
attempts. At one point one nurse said, “please call back later, it’s a zoo here.” At another point the
nurse said that they are still doing their rounds giving out medication. This was at 1 am and they came
on shift at 7 pm.
Finally, at 1:15 am the nurse called me saying that she connected the device.
I saw mom but for one second and then mom’s device tilted away, and I just saw the bed. Before I could
ask the nurse to adjust it, the nurse was gone. I was happy to be able to talk to mom. “Mommy, I hope
you can hear me,” I said, “we’re here for you and we’re trying the best we can to care for you. We’re in
touch with the nurses and we’re working on a plan to get you to a place where we can take better care
of you.” Then I sang mom a lullaby, and only then went to sleep.
An hour later, I saw the hospital number on my caller ID again. This time the doctor on the other side of
the phone informed me that mom had just passed away.
In the days after mom was removed from the ventilator we were in touch with doctors, nurses,
hospitalists, social workers, chaplains and liaisons. We were pleading with them that survival could not
be expected just by pumping meds. The medical literature if full of hard evidence that hopefulness and
emotional wellbeing plays as large a role as medical interventions.
Many cared, others offered to do
something, some made some efforts, but the overall situation remained the same. My family was
shocked with the news considering mom’s recent progress, but I was not shocked.
I’m not blaming I’m just beseeching policy makers to please bring about change, fast. I ask that family
members who had tested positive for COVID-19 and are 14 days post symptoms should be allowed to
stay with their loved one. I likewise ask that hospitals that can’t provide humane care should close their
doors to new patients who can be sent to less busy hospitals (or to the Javits hospital or to the military
hospital ship). It just makes sense.
True, COVID-19 caught us by surprise, but right now we no longer have any excuses to continue with
medieval practices. If inmates on death row are given rights, so should my mom and others like her.
Sincerely,
Mordechai Neuman
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
mneumanlcsw@gmail.com
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amother
Pink
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Sun, May 03 2020, 7:48 pm
True, COVID-19 caught us by surprise, but right now we no longer have any excuses to continue with
medieval practices. If inmates on death row are given rights, so should my mom and others like her.
I dont believe that prohi itimg visitors was medieval. It was evidence based practice for infection control in community medicine. Ho we ever the early crisis days are over and something must have been learned by now.There must be a way to allow every patient to have someone with them just like in peds and labor delivery.
I believe community efforts should focus on that.
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amother
Lawngreen
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Sun, May 03 2020, 8:10 pm
| cbsp wrote: | Is this first hand enough?
It was posted on LinkedIn one week ago by the author's colleague:
https://www.linkedin.com/posts.....-TNZM
(the formatting got lost in the copy /paste)
Mom survived COVID-19 but died of hopelessness, all alone.
This is an open letter to Governor Cuomo, President Trump, the medical community, or anyone else
who cares:
My siblings and I are now sitting shiva for mom. Mom survived COVID-19 but died of hopelessness, all
alone. We are not bitter about it and we’re not here to point fingers at anyone. We believe that mom’s
passing was the will of God and we fully accept it. We would like to publicize this letter simply to let the
world know what’s going on in hospitals in the hopes that it brings about change, fast, so that more
needless deaths can be avoided.
Mom was 62 and had underlying medical issues. She fought like a tiger and survived many medical
battles. She was full of life and full of hope. She was there for others and was a source of hope to many.
Despite being quarantined for several weeks, mom woke up with a fever on Friday, March 27, and was
advised by her doctor to report immediately to the nearest emergency room. Despite mom being very
forlorn due to the chaos around her in the hospital, we were still able to communicate with her via her
cellphone. She was very weak, but we stayed in touch. By Monday, March 30, her breathing regressed
and she needed to be intubated and placed on a ventilator. She stayed on the ventilator for 18 long
days, and finally on April 16 we received the great news that she was removed from the ventilator.
Mom continued her progress and after a few days she was able to communicate with us verbally. Not
more than a word or two, but we heard her voice, and more importantly she heard ours. We had sent
the hospital a device to be clipped on her bed which would allow us to see mom the whole time and talk
to her.
The plan was a good one. We would continue being with mom virtually through the device and keep on
injecting her with care and hope, while we would stay in touch with the nurses (and bring them
chocolate) on a daily basis.
But the plan didn’t work out.
The device was on the hospital’s Guest WiFi which kept on refreshing and kicking off devices, and we
were advised that we cannot connect to the hospital’s more stable internal WiFi. We had lost contact
with mom. Then mom stepped off the ICU and now only had a nurse in her room once every hour or
two! We were then advised that mom is no longer communicating verbally but she still communicates
with her eyes. Mom was regressing.
On Wednesday, April 22, I spoke with the hospital social worker and said quite frankly that if this keeps
up mom will not make it. While based on the charts, mom was “progressing”, I knew that given her
underlying medical issues her secret to survival was the joy of her family (3 children, 18 grandchildren,
and 1 great grandchild). Without being in touch with her family, hopelessness would set in which would
aggravate her underlying medical issues.
I pleaded with the social worker to give mom the therapies she
needs in order for the NG tube to be removed so that we could transfer her to a high care nursing
facility or even home with a nursing aide. I pleaded with the nurses to reconnect the device so that we
could have some kind of human connection with mom. I sent a text to the hospital liaison
saying “Compassion please. My mother is laying like rag and a nurse goes in only every hour and a
half.”
Later that night I started hitting the redial button to the nurses’ station. I had sent in a MiFi card (again,
with chocolate) and begged them to reconnect the device so that I can talk to mom. It took many
attempts. At one point one nurse said, “please call back later, it’s a zoo here.” At another point the
nurse said that they are still doing their rounds giving out medication. This was at 1 am and they came
on shift at 7 pm.
Finally, at 1:15 am the nurse called me saying that she connected the device.
I saw mom but for one second and then mom’s device tilted away, and I just saw the bed. Before I could
ask the nurse to adjust it, the nurse was gone. I was happy to be able to talk to mom. “Mommy, I hope
you can hear me,” I said, “we’re here for you and we’re trying the best we can to care for you. We’re in
touch with the nurses and we’re working on a plan to get you to a place where we can take better care
of you.” Then I sang mom a lullaby, and only then went to sleep.
An hour later, I saw the hospital number on my caller ID again. This time the doctor on the other side of
the phone informed me that mom had just passed away.
In the days after mom was removed from the ventilator we were in touch with doctors, nurses,
hospitalists, social workers, chaplains and liaisons. We were pleading with them that survival could not
be expected just by pumping meds. The medical literature if full of hard evidence that hopefulness and
emotional wellbeing plays as large a role as medical interventions.
Many cared, others offered to do
something, some made some efforts, but the overall situation remained the same. My family was
shocked with the news considering mom’s recent progress, but I was not shocked.
I’m not blaming I’m just beseeching policy makers to please bring about change, fast. I ask that family
members who had tested positive for COVID-19 and are 14 days post symptoms should be allowed to
stay with their loved one. I likewise ask that hospitals that can’t provide humane care should close their
doors to new patients who can be sent to less busy hospitals (or to the Javits hospital or to the military
hospital ship). It just makes sense.
True, COVID-19 caught us by surprise, but right now we no longer have any excuses to continue with
medieval practices. If inmates on death row are given rights, so should my mom and others like her.
Sincerely,
Mordechai Neuman
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
mneumanlcsw@gmail.com |
This is so sad, and unfortunately not an isolated situation. And I don't want to seem cruel, but this seems to be a prime example of an overwhelming situation and not willful or deliberate neglect in any way. This pandemic overtook all capabilities within a span of a few days, and everyone was left struggling to keep up with a losing battle.
Though now that the critical situation has lessened a bit, I am with you all the way that change needs to happen - and it needs to happen fast.
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amother
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Sun, May 03 2020, 8:47 pm
| amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote: | I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. And I don't want to belabor the point. But 'knowing' it first-hand means you experienced yourself. Hearing it from a first hand source is a step down from that. And like I said above, sometimes (and I stress sometimes, because other times it is true) a perspective from sick patient is skewed because of the state he was during his illness.
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Then the burden of proof must lie with the hospitals.
There are no witnesses.
No liability.
Gag orders.
PR departments.
No oversight.
And now you say we cannot even rely on first hand testimony.
According to you, there is no way to prove whether or not hospitals are causing patients to die of neglect. It's impossible.
In that case, we must lend credence to every single report until there is objective oversight that is not accountable to the hospitals.
There is simply no other way to know, by your own admission.
When lives are at stake, we cannot ignore. We cannot blindly trust. We MUST act. We cannot stand idly by on the blood of our fellow Jews.
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