Are snarky posters snarky IRL?

raich

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 7:51 pm

I have been wondering this for a while. I find (and I know others agree) that there is a lot of negativity posted here, and I have been noticing that often a very mild/pleasant/positive/helpful/supportive post is going along just fine, until a member says something snarky, nasty, judgmental, etc...and then the whole thing blows up.

I have been wondering... Do these people speak and act the same way in their real lives? Or does this anonymity allow for us to say things that we would never say IRL? And if so, what would cause an ordinarily polite person to suddenly start saying stuff she'd never usually say?

What do you think? I'd love to hear all your thoughts (snarky or otherwise lol.) (Hopefully otherwise... Very Happy

)

lilies

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 7:59 pm

I'm sure there are a minority of snarky people that are just snarky all-around. I believe most posts may come across snarkier than people mean it to.
I know my posts are missing my natural expression of friendliness and warmth Smile

chanatron1000

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 7:59 pm

I've heard it said that people are more mean online, but I actually think it goes both ways. People are sometimes much warmer and friendlier online than they would be IRL. I think both are because people feel less inhibited. I don't think it's from anonymity, because this is true on non-anonymous sites as well.

pizzapie

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:01 pm

I doubt it. Most people are more subtle when speaking face to face. I would doubt that many of the snarky posters are half as nasty when messaging people they know because there are repercussions for nasty remarks irl. The illusion of anonymity that the internet provides strips away social barriers otherwise know as manners.

malki2

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:02 pm

Depends on my mood. But I’m much snarkier in text and online than I am IRL. Sometimes I read the posts and just can’t resist firing off a good snark.

amother

Gold

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:04 pm

Perhaps posters especially since anon care less how others perceive them. Lots of things we do is subconsciously done for people who see us... otoh could be like me lots of posters just come on here cause they're tired and burnt out and sad and..

acemom

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:08 pm

My SIL is definitely not on Imamother, but the snarky comments I see here are similar to the type of comments we get from her in real life.

I just hope not ALL rude posters are exactly like their online persona.

Be nice!

amother

cornflower

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:08 pm

raich wrote:

)

I think if all it takes for everyone to blow up is one person saying something snarky then everyone else was already ready to blow up

CiCi

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:09 pm

If someone asks people for opinions of what they feel about an issue and then someone answers with something that many people disagree with. Is that minority opinion considered snarky?

In my opinion being snarky means that when someone who doesn't agree with someone else's opinion thinks they can start making personal insults or they misconstrue their comments or simply start with arguments that have nothing to do with what the person posted, only the snarky person is extrapolating something that the commenter never said.

Last edited by CiCi on Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:12 pm; edited 2 times in total

amother

Amethyst

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:12 pm

I just wanna say that I learnt how to be snarky on here. I find myself on group chats where everyone is kind and pleasant and sometimes I use the expressions I picked up here
Smile

Petra

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:12 pm

Many times, if I see a post that lends itself to a ridiculous, sarcastic retort I think it but I don't actually type it since it is socially unacceptable. So, I just don't reply.

I'm horribly sarcastic in my head, but try not to be out loud, IRL. It's a fault of mine (my sarcasm) and I'm working on it but I don't know how not to think those thoughts.

amother

Periwinkle

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:15 pm

1-I think the tone of voice is missing so that explains some nasty posters that really don't mean to be.
2-some subjects(like Sd during corona?)are triggers for some others.
3- much more than usual now because ppl are less tolerant from trying to be so nice the whole day with their own family.
4- there are sime nasty ppl in real life,unfortunately, some on imamother too!!!
Just my humble opinion!

lilies

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:15 pm

malki2 wrote:

Depends on my mood. But I’m much snarkier in text and online than I am IRL. Sometimes I read the posts and just can’t resist firing off a good snark.

Yes, you do have a particular flavor of snark to your posts. More of an upbeat snark.

Cherry Blossom

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:23 pm

lilies wrote:

Well I always imagined you as this super friendly outgoing person.

amother

Pink

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:30 pm

When I post under my SN I think 3 times before. I don't want people knowing "me" as this nasty person. Whereas when posting amother, I just type whatever comes to mind. Mostly, it won't be mean or attacking because I like to think of myself as a nice person but sometimes usually when a poster has an opinion where I think her behaviour hurts other people and she still thinks its right, I just rant...

Hillery

Wed, Apr 29 2020, 8:49 pm

amother [ Pink ] wrote:

You'll probably find that's what a sizable percentage of amother posts are about. If there is one single thing that would make imamother a nicer place, it would be to ban amother unless personal info is being posted or for another valid reason.