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After how many kids
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Sun, May 17 2020, 5:58 pm
Needed? Before my First.
I work f/t with a commute.

I still don’t have cleaning help, though.

I come home exhausted with no energy to lift a finger..
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Ema of 5




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 17 2020, 5:59 pm
amother [ Forestgreen ] wrote:
Totally depends

... On how involved and helpful is your husband

... Your strengths

... Your health

... How big your house is

... Your standards, your husbands standards

... Your work schedule

... Your upbringing

... Your income

... How many kids, how close in age

I'm sure I missed something

So the real question is - how do you feel OP? There is no right or wrong answer

You left out the age of the kids, and how active they are. My 4 year old is more active than any of her siblings were at her age. She is mischievous and destructive and super sensory seeking.
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little neshamala




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 17 2020, 6:07 pm
amother [ Forestgreen ] wrote:
Totally depends

... On how involved and helpful is your husband

... Your strengths

... Your health

... How big your house is

... Your standards, your husbands standards

... Your work schedule

... Your upbringing

... Your income

... How many kids, how close in age

I'm sure I missed something

So the real question is - how do you feel OP? There is no right or wrong answer


Yup yup yup this
OP I have never wanted cleaning help, even after the 3rd kid. Both my husband and I work full time. We dont want cleaning help primarly because we LOVE putting aside our "cleaning lady money" weekly and then using that money for fun stuff like a vacation, or ice skating, or extras for the kids, that otherwise wouldve been a bit tight to pay for...
We also dont want cleaning help because we strongly believe in the whole family pitching in regularly to keep the house clean. On a matter of principle, we like our kids dusting and sorting laundry etc.

BUUUUUUUUUUUTTT

BUT BUT BUT

it totally depends on your specific circumstance.
In my case, we only manage to do this because my husband is 100% into this and helps a LOT. Theres no possible way I could do it without him.
If he had a job with longer hours, or any other reason why he couldnt help as much as he does, I would have likely had a cleaning lady years ago, principles or no principles.

Its really very individual....
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amother
Aqua


 

Post Sun, May 17 2020, 6:11 pm
I always had. I’m not good at cleaning but not having a clean house makes me nervous. So I’ve always had .
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chillax




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 17 2020, 8:32 pm
I have always wanted and needed 🤷🏽‍♀️
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Ema of 5




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 17 2020, 8:57 pm
little neshamala wrote:
Yup yup yup this
OP I have never wanted cleaning help, even after the 3rd kid. Both my husband and I work full time. We dont want cleaning help primarly because we LOVE putting aside our "cleaning lady money" weekly and then using that money for fun stuff like a vacation, or ice skating, or extras for the kids, that otherwise wouldve been a bit tight to pay for...
We also dont want cleaning help because we strongly believe in the whole family pitching in regularly to keep the house clean. On a matter of principle, we like our kids dusting and sorting laundry etc.

BUUUUUUUUUUUTTT

BUT BUT BUT

it totally depends on your specific circumstance.
In my case, we only manage to do this because my husband is 100% into this and helps a LOT. Theres no possible way I could do it without him.
If he had a job with longer hours, or any other reason why he couldnt help as much as he does, I would have likely had a cleaning lady years ago, principles or no principles.

Its really very individual....

I have a cleaning lady 3x/week, and my kids sort and fold laundry, are responsible to each clean up one of the rooms downstairs (living room, dining room, kitchen, play room) every day. They have specific jobs for erev shabbos as well.
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amother
Burgundy


 

Post Sun, May 17 2020, 9:30 pm
I started having cleaning help after going back to work with my first baby. The hours gradually increased after each baby. my cleaning lady comes 2x a week. When she comes in the beginning of the week she also helps me fold and iron the laundry. I find that if my laundry is taken care of I can manage with kids and work better.
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amother
Orchid


 

Post Sun, May 17 2020, 9:30 pm
When I was Newly married, nada. After a year of full time school and part time work I couldn’t keep up, got cleaning help for 2 hours Thursdays.
After baby #1, I increased to 3 hours once a week. At that point dh was working full plus overtime.
When baby was a year I was Back in grad school with crazy hours, I needed a nanny, so I hired someone who was willing to do housekeeping as well. She worked 5 days a week, whenever I was in school.
After graduating I worked part time, got daily half day Nanny/housekeeper. As the family grew and dh got busier, travelled a lot for work, I just always hired full time. I stopped working a few years ago after baby #5 but still kept full time help since dh hardly around, and I guess I got used to it. I find I always need someone to be at home in case I need to run out on an urgent errand, any emergency, take a kid to the dr, even convenient for a simcha since The kids are used to her, don’t need to get someone else.
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BA




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 18 2020, 2:05 am
I finally got a cleaning lady when I was expecting my fourth. I had the opportunity to work more hours (from home bh) so I figured I should work a few more hours (rather than cleaning my house) and hire a cleaning lady twice a week for 2 hours at a time.
since then I have had cleaning help on and off pending my workload and ability to deal with the mess. after having my fifth kid kah I had tons of cleaning help but then went back to sporadic cleaning help and now I have none due to corona.
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amother
Orange


 

Post Mon, May 18 2020, 5:48 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
No one else has or wants cleaning help?


Sure I want cleaning help! I have 8 kids under 12 and MS but due to the MS I am no longer working and therefore affording cleaning help isn't an option so I do my best on my own. I had cleaning help once I started working full time - so I had 3 kids.
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lovingmommy3417




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 18 2020, 5:23 pm
I'm a mom of 2 who precovid worked full time and went to school part time. Still never really felt the need to have cleaning help. Every once in a while I'm overwhelmed and would like it but not usually.
Bh my husband is pretty neat and organized but doesnt do most of the real cleaning.
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