Is your baby going to be undressed on Yom Tov?

little neshamala

Thu, May 28 2020, 2:41 pm

Zehava wrote:

This thread very much reminds me of the geirim/BT thread. Everyone with their pc responses that don’t reflect Frum urban reality at all.

I dont agree. Im a born and bred in-town Monsey NY-er. I dress my babies in carters and childrens place, and I purposely dont dress them in Jewish stores shabbos clothes, not because I cant afford it, but because I dont like them looking like gay jesters from the 1700s.
(If you like the styles, go ahead and enjoy. I dont, and thats why I dont buy them. Nothing to do with money or anything else)

Last edited by little neshamala on Thu, May 28 2020, 2:43 pm; edited 1 time in total

Blessing1

Thu, May 28 2020, 2:43 pm

avrahamama wrote:

How about I won't call you shallow if you don't call me nerdy.

(I'm sorry I didn't mean to sound snarky. But it wasn't very kindly put. I don't think people who dress their kids I'm trendy clothes are shallow. But I also don't think babies dressed in just a onesie are nerdy. I mean of all things to be judgemental about ... This would be last on my list)

Sorry, I didn't call you or anyone nerdy. I was bringing out that cute and in style doesn't equal expensive.
However someone mentioned upthread that people that dress their kids nice and in style are shallow.

avrahamama

Thu, May 28 2020, 2:44 pm

Blessing1 wrote:

I'm saying in style and cute aren't synonymous. And there's no such thing as a baby dressed nerdy.

amother

Pumpkin

Thu, May 28 2020, 2:45 pm

little neshamala wrote:

I dont agree. Im a born and bred in-town Monsey NY-er. I dress my babies in carters and childrens place, and I purposely dont dress them in Jewish stores shabbos, not because I cant afford it, but because I dont like them looking like gay jesters from the 1700s.
(If you like the styles, go ahead and enjoy. I dont, and thats why I dont buy them. Nothing to do with money or anything else)

I love this so much! I’m now BH expecting a boy after having a girl and I show my husband ads in mishpacha of the things I’d never in a million years put on my son. I just don’t like the style (leggings, shirtless rompers, bonnets on boys, shirts that look like pajamas, colors that look feminine to me like teal or peach) The styles don’t become more attractive to me because ‘everyone’ Is wearing it or because it’s ‘European’

Blessing1

Thu, May 28 2020, 2:46 pm

little neshamala wrote:

While this can be said for Monsey, this can't be said for other chassidish communities. OP is going to a chassidish community for Yom Tov and is wondering if her baby will be sticking out wearing a Onesie. The answer is yes. You don't see babies wearing onesies in that community on yom tov.
Every community has different norms and standards. There are plenty of communities where you won't feel out of place when your kids are dressed in onesies. But in most Brooklyn communities, you'll be the odd one out.

Last edited by Blessing1 on Thu, May 28 2020, 3:08 pm; edited 1 time in total

Stars

Thu, May 28 2020, 2:47 pm

Blessing1 wrote:

No one said anything about people commenting.
A Onesie isn't clothing and you don't typically see babies out in onesies, especially in frum neighborhoods on shabbos and yom tov.
We're allowed to dress our babies nicely just for ourselves or to fit into the community. Nothing wrong with that. Sometimes on these sort of threads I get the vibe that people go out of their way to dress their kids nerdy and cheaply looking and it's a contest who's kids are dressed the cheapest, and whoever likes to dress their kids nice and in style is "shallow".
There's nothing wrong with having different taste and wanting to dress your kids in style.
And nowdays, you can find on Aliexpress identical clothing to what the Jewish stores have for practically pennies. Cheap doesn't have to mean nebby and nerdy.

Excuse me. No one said cheap means nebby and nerdy. I don't spend a lot of kids clothes and my kids are always dressed classy, adorably, and tastefully.

Zehava

Thu, May 28 2020, 2:47 pm

amother [ Cobalt ] wrote:

That’s probably because we are not all part of the frum urban community. There is some diversity here. But now I’m curious what is the real frum urban viewpoint?

The reality is, that the place where op will be spending YT in is a fashion show especially on Shavuos.
I mean on a colder YT where your baby is in a jacket or snowsuit that’s one thing. But Shavuos is the time when you’ll be marching down the avenue and passing by hundreds of babies and kids in perfectly matching, perfectly starched, perfectly stylish clothes with the perfect accessories.

Zehava

Thu, May 28 2020, 2:49 pm

amother [ Chartreuse ] wrote:

Why? Because your friends happen to look down at you for buying carter's? I'm haooy to say I don't have a single friend like that. Life is stressful enough, why go look for more of it?

Ftr I live in Williamsburg.

Thankfully no lol
I do hate when people distort reality though

Blessing1

Thu, May 28 2020, 2:53 pm

Stars wrote:

Excuse me. No one said cheap means nebby and nerdy. I don't spend a lot of kids clothes and my kids are always dressed classy, adorably, and tastefully.

This is exactly what I wrote. That nice and in style doesn't mean expensive.
Some posters think that if your baby isn't wearing a Carter's onseie, their clothing is fancy and expensive and you're shallow for dressing your kids nice.
There's a whole line between a Onesie and expensive clothing from Jewish stores. It's not either or.

Blessing1

Thu, May 28 2020, 3:03 pm

Zehava wrote:

Thankfully no lol
I do hate when people distort reality though

Exactly. We're allowed and we definitely should answer OP honestly. While a Onsie is the norm in some communities, there are communities where it's not common. There's nothing wrong with either community, it's just different standards and different norms.

amother

Ecru

Thu, May 28 2020, 3:12 pm

If you’re going to be in Williamsburg, he will stick out with just a Carter’s onesie. That’s the sad reality. I doubt anyone will say anything to you, but if you’re feeling insecure now, it will only get worst over yom tov unless you’re going to be around people who don’t give a flying hoot about dressing their kids up to the nines.

avrahamama

Thu, May 28 2020, 3:15 pm

amother [ Ecru ] wrote:

Or any insecurities won't get worse. Because now you're prepared not to take it personally. But bzh people will have manners and middot tovot and be prepared to accept each other and the Torah.

giselle

Thu, May 28 2020, 3:22 pm

Blessing1 wrote:

I don’t think people who dress their kids nicely are shallow, but I do think it’s shallow to be overly into fashion. I know, because I’m like that and I think it’s very shallow of me. I also have a deeper side to me, but sorry it’s definitely shallow to be as into clothing as people are commenting here. Like I said, guilty as charged, but don’t pretend it’s anything else.

Blessing1

Thu, May 28 2020, 3:25 pm

avrahamama wrote:

Or any insecurities won't get worse. Because now you're prepared not to take it personally. But bzh people will have manners and middot tovot and be prepared to accept each other and the Torah.

No one will comment on the way her baby is dressed. Strangers generally don't comment to other strangers about their babies dress. She might get stares, but everyone gets stared at. So definitely don't take it personally.

Zehava

Thu, May 28 2020, 3:31 pm

amother [ Ecru ] wrote:

And I hate to say this but since you already are different in a closed, racist community you will
Be enforcing stereotypes

avrahamama

Thu, May 28 2020, 3:34 pm

Zehava wrote:

And I hate to say this but since you already are different in a closed, racist community you will
Be enforcing stereotypes

You shouldn't have said it. You don't even know her. You don't know what she will be reinforcing.

Zehava

Thu, May 28 2020, 3:37 pm

avrahamama wrote:

You shouldn't have said it. You don't even know her. You don't know what she will be reinforcing.

She did put her life story on imamother multiple times

avrahamama

Thu, May 28 2020, 3:39 pm

Zehava wrote:

She did put her life story on imamother multiple times

Deleting.

I hate sounding sharp.

OP this chag we are all mekabel the Torah and KHBH. I hope it's a beautiful one. Enjoy your baby. Take his onesie off and marvel at the majesty of him. Smell his baby smell. Feel his silky baby skin. Have nachat. And please we should all give HKBH nachar.

Last edited by avrahamama on Thu, May 28 2020, 3:43 pm; edited 1 time in total