Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Judaism
Torah and happiness
1  2  Next



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother
OP


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:13 am
I am super frum and happy to be however I deal with difficult emotions often and have found relief in places outside the Torah (secular self help books). Furthermore I find I often get overwhelmed by the countless mitzvos. Torah is supposed to be the purpose of life, the source of joy so where am I going wrong?
Back to top

Ora in town




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:34 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I am super frum and happy to be however I deal with difficult emotions often and have found relief in places outside the Torah (secular self help books). Furthermore I find I often get overwhelmed by the countless mitzvos. Torah is supposed to be the purpose of life, the source of joy so where am I going wrong?

In assuming that it's wrong to read secular self help books...
Back to top

amother
Amber


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:38 am
Ora in town wrote:
In assuming that it's wrong to read secular self help books...


:👍
Back to top

amother
Mistyrose


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:39 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I am super frum and happy to be however I deal with difficult emotions often and have found relief in places outside the Torah (secular self help books). Furthermore I find I often get overwhelmed by the countless mitzvos. Torah is supposed to be the purpose of life, the source of joy so where am I going wrong?


You are not doing anything wrong. There is knowledge among the nations some secular help books are a huge help. Who didn't got any advice from Imasinger to buy one she advised?!
Also, the books from Rav Twerski are really helpful.
But that does not help you, yet I also don't know always what will help me with my struggles or emotions, I'm know reading Orchos Yosher of R' Chaim Kanievsky, does it help? Well, not always it gives me tools.

The torah says Darchee noam, that the paths of Torah are paths of pleasantness, and I always hold to that. I was brought up with a Calvinistic view of religion, that religion is oppressive. You HAVE TO follow this otherwise you getting burnt in HELL Twisted Evil Well I've learned in becoming BT and in my marriage that this is not the yiddishe way. I have a hard time with hacharkot, I know that Hashem wants me to follow this because that is what I find good for me, and however if I break it (not relations but like sitting on the same couch or so) I will make myself mad by punishing myself and hating myself, and then I hold a grudge to a mitzvah I find important to do so which make me more difficult to hold that mitzvah. And that is not helpful. Because I've learned that hashem is not punishing me with a whip or when I touch my DH arm during time of hacharkot Hashem will give me Covid-19 or whatever. He is just asking me to make responsible choices with mitzvot. I mean in the Shelosh-'Esreh Middot HaRakhamim there is no ''I'm going to punish you''. That helped me.
Back to top

amother
Amber


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:41 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I am super frum and happy to be however I deal with difficult emotions often and have found relief in places outside the Torah (secular self help books). Furthermore I find I often get overwhelmed by the countless mitzvos. Torah is supposed to be the purpose of life, the source of joy so where am I going wrong?


Don't be "super frum" just be frum
Don't do too much!
Be normal.
Read books . even secular..
Listen to music..
Enjoy your life !
You're too strict with yourself...
Back to top

shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:56 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I am super frum and happy to be however I deal with difficult emotions often and have found relief in places outside the Torah (secular self help books). Furthermore I find I often get overwhelmed by the countless mitzvos. Torah is supposed to be the purpose of life, the source of joy so where am I going wrong?
There is nothing wrong with reading self help books that come from people that are not jewish. If it helps you? Why not? You arent reading christian books or something like that, right?
You might not be doing anything wrong. You may just need to talk to someone about all of this. Would that be an option? And I dont necessarily mean a therapist, although that might work too.
A caring friend, a sibling, a teacher that knows you well?
Back to top

amother
Orchid


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 7:40 am
The fact that Torah is complete doesn't mean that it's expressed in a way that is useful to us. No one thinks twice before using the medical and scientific expertise of non-Jews. What's true for the body is true for the mind. Psychology and great works of literature allow us to understand our humanity. We need these things to access our souls and be better ovdei Hashem.
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 10:45 am
shabbatiscoming wrote:
There is nothing wrong with reading self help books that come from people that are not jewish. If it helps you? Why not? You arent reading christian books or something like that, right?
You might not be doing anything wrong. You may just need to talk to someone about all of this. Would that be an option? And I dont necessarily mean a therapist, although that might work too.
A caring friend, a sibling, a teacher that knows you well?


Budhist/yogic with Christian references that I try to ignore....mindfullness as a way of connecting to the soul. On shavuos I was reading about Torah being the only way to elevate the soul etc...guilt started kicking in.
Back to top

shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 10:49 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Budhist/yogic with Christian references that I try to ignore....mindfullness as a way of connecting to the soul. On shavuos I was reading about Torah being the only way to elevate the soul etc...guilt started kicking in.
Mindfulness is so powerful.
Im not the right one to tell you if Torah is the only way to elevate the soul, but I truly think hashem created many different avenues to elevate our soul or to speak to our soul.
Dont let the guilt kick in. There is no reason for it. You arent studying christianity. Its ok to read things about other religions. Smile
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 10:56 am
shabbatiscoming wrote:
Mindfulness is so powerful.
Im not the right one to tell you if Torah is the only way to elevate the soul, but I truly think hashem created many different avenues to elevate our soul or to speak to our soul.
Dont let the guilt kick in. There is no reason for it. You arent studying christianity. Its ok to read things about other religions. Smile


Actually finding that I'm davening and saying Brachos with more aliveness and kavanah but I feel guilty like a disloyalty...
Back to top

BH Yom Yom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 11:08 am
amother [ Orchid ] wrote:
The fact that Torah is complete doesn't mean that it's expressed in a way that is useful to us. No one thinks twice before using the medical and scientific expertise of non-Jews. What's true for the body is true for the mind. Psychology and great works of literature allow us to understand our humanity. We need these things to access our souls and be better ovdei Hashem.


I cannot like this post enough!! Very well said, you expressed something I’ve been feeling for a while but didn’t have the words to describe.
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 11:49 am
amother [ Orchid ] wrote:
The fact that Torah is complete doesn't mean that it's expressed in a way that is useful to us. No one thinks twice before using the medical and scientific expertise of non-Jews. What's true for the body is true for the mind. Psychology and great works of literature allow us to understand our humanity. We need these things to access our souls and be better ovdei Hashem.


I didn't see this.

One thing only is it causes you to connect to your soul, it's spiritual not just mental and physical.
Back to top

PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 1:47 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Budhist/yogic with Christian references that I try to ignore....mindfullness as a way of connecting to the soul. On shavuos I was reading about Torah being the only way to elevate the soul etc...guilt started kicking in.


You might want to get hold of Letters to A Buddhist Jew by Dr. Tatz and David Gottleib (not a rabbi).
Buddhism as presented now can seem quite appealing, but you might want to hear Sara Yoheved Rigler talk about it. Judaism is a religion of connection. Buddhism is not.
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 5:37 pm
PinkFridge wrote:
You might want to get hold of Letters to A Buddhist Jew by Dr. Tatz and David Gottleib (not a rabbi).
Buddhism as presented now can seem quite appealing, but you might want to hear Sara Yoheved Rigler talk about it. Judaism is a religion of connection. Buddhism is not.


The book seems to be more about Judaism than Budhism. Where can I access these topics by Sora Yocheved Rigler
Back to top

BH Yom Yom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 5:46 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
The book seems to be more about Judaism than Budhism. Where can I access these topics by Sora Yocheved Rigler


She has a book called God Winked, which is part of memoir, part mussar sefer, and part stories, very well written; touches on some of her experience in an ashram and the differences in spiritual approach and quality between Judaism and Buddhism.
Back to top

ssspectacular




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:15 pm
Mindfulness is accepted in mainstream psychology and medicine. I don't think you have to worry about it at all.
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:27 pm
ssspectacular wrote:
Mindfulness is accepted in mainstream psychology and medicine. I don't think you have to worry about it at all.


I know but stop for a second and think how much joy and connection you have to your neshama from mindfullness..I feel guilty. It should come from keeping the Torah and Mitzvos.
Back to top

ssspectacular




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:34 pm
I often repeat this: The Torah presumes health, both physical and mental. If you need mindfulness for your mental health, it is a prerequisite for your Avodah! I never feel guilty but sometimes feel sad that I need this type of help.
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:45 pm
ssspectacular wrote:
I often repeat this: The Torah presumes health, both physical and mental. If you need mindfulness for your mental health, it is a prerequisite for your Avodah! I never feel guilty but sometimes feel sad that I need this type of help.


Even helping you connect to your neshama/essence.
Back to top

amother
OP


 

Post Sun, May 31 2020, 6:47 pm
ssspectacular wrote:
I often repeat this: The Torah presumes health, both physical and mental. If you need mindfulness for your mental health, it is a prerequisite for your Avodah! I never feel guilty but sometimes feel sad that I need this type of help.


Also what is the source for this?
Back to top
Page 1 of 2 1  2  Next Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Judaism

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Therapy/purim Torah
by effess
4 Fri, Mar 22 2024, 12:17 am View last post
Education level? - talmud torah d monsey cheder
by amother
0 Sun, Mar 10 2024, 1:12 pm View last post
Reminder: increase your happiness again
by amother
1 Sun, Mar 10 2024, 3:58 am View last post
Difference between talmud torah monsey & beer yeshaya
by amother
6 Sat, Mar 09 2024, 11:24 pm View last post
The new torah anytime website 0 Sat, Feb 03 2024, 7:55 pm View last post