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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Infants
I hate the newborn stage :(
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amother
OP


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 4:54 pm
amother [ Lilac ] wrote:
I felt the same way and I had postpartum anxiety.


I would love to hear more. I most likely am suffering from ppa. What helped you deal with it?
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amother
Navy


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 5:15 pm
Thanks OP for bringing up this topic. Sounds just like me.
I can't wait for the first three months to pass and found it so hard when people said "make the most of every minute" and "it passes so fast".
And now, I've got 5 adorable kids k.e.h. my youngest is a toddler.
While I can't say the first three months got easier with subsequent children, but it got easier in that at least I knew that IT WILL PASS and I should just hang on until then.
Growing up, I was never good at looking after newborns so that might be why.
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 5:28 pm
Does anyone not feel this way? I loved my newborn but didn’t enjoy the stage. Life is much better when we are all able to sleep
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meiravit




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 7:27 pm
OP, Mazel Tov!

So glad you have a night nurse! I hope you get to sleep at night, at least.

Two weeks postpartum is very recent. I hope you are taking good care of yourself. Are you eating nutritious food? Drinking enough? Taking a multi-vitamin, or whatever your ob recommends?
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 8:07 pm
I don't hate it but I don't enjoy it very much either. It's boring, exhausting, not very rewarding, no time to eat or shower, etc. I look forward to them growing up. Unlike a lot of moms, I don't cry when my babies reach the next stage. The more independent the better.
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amother
Lilac


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 8:17 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I would love to hear more. I most likely am suffering from ppa. What helped you deal with it?


Firstly, that’s great that you got a night nurse. I was too anxious to let a stranger watch my baby but getting sleep will probably help you a lot. I had trouble relaxing because I was worried about the baby breathing and was always checking. I just kind of rode it out and didn’t seek any kind of help for the anxiety and things got a little better over time. But getting help is the smart thing to do.
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amother
Teal


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 8:20 pm
One thing that really helped me was having my baby scheduled. She ate every 3 hours, at 2, 5, 8 &11.
I needed it that way for her feedings to be monitored and to monitor her weight gain, but it really helped knowing every time after a feeding that I now have two and a half hours to myself.
Definitely taught me to schedule my next.
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amother
Lilac


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 8:23 pm
amother [ Teal ] wrote:
One thing that really helped me was having my baby scheduled. She ate every 3 hours, at 2, 5, 8 &11.
I needed it that way for her feedings to be monitored and to monitor her weight gain, but it really helped knowing every time after a feeding that I now have two and a half hours to myself.
Definitely taught me to schedule my next.


That’s harder to do with a breastfed baby.
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Kiwi13




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 8:30 pm
My best chizuk is: They're only newborns for a few weeks. I had horrible anxiety with newborn cries, I literally FELT it in my body and I would hear "phantom cries" in the night and in the shower and whenever and wherever I was even alone. I felt insane from just that part alone. The only things I like about the newborn stage are the fact that the baby is no longer inside of me, the snuggles, the cosleeping, the "new baby smell," and... that just about concludes the list. They are scary little things at that young age and I live in fear of breaking them somehow. It creeps me out that their heads are so soft and I panic whenever anyone or anything touches them or breathes on them or if they look too hot or cold or cranky, etc.

And then come weeks 5 and 6 and 7... and they get bigger and stronger and more interactive and you get into a new normal with them in your life, and the non-newborn stage lasts for the whole rest of forever. You have just another couple weeks to go, OP. I know it's hard, believe me I've been there. The early days are a time warp of sleeplessness and stress, but they do go faster than you fear. You can do this!

I hope this is at least somewhat helpful. Mazal tov on your new baby!
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boysrock




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 9:14 pm
Me too!!!! Lol I can’t wait until things are “normal” again!
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amother
Scarlet


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 9:38 pm
If paci falls out and wakes her then maybe try out different types of pacifiers.
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amother
OP


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 10:18 pm
Kiwi13 wrote:
My best chizuk is: They're only newborns for a few weeks. I had horrible anxiety with newborn cries, I literally FELT it in my body and I would hear "phantom cries" in the night and in the shower and whenever and wherever I was even alone. I felt insane from just that part alone. The only things I like about the newborn stage are the fact that the baby is no longer inside of me, the snuggles, the cosleeping, the "new baby smell," and... that just about concludes the list. They are scary little things at that young age and I live in fear of breaking them somehow. It creeps me out that their heads are so soft and I panic whenever anyone or anything touches them or breathes on them or if they look too hot or cold or cranky, etc.

And then come weeks 5 and 6 and 7... and they get bigger and stronger and more interactive and you get into a new normal with them in your life, and the non-newborn stage lasts for the whole rest of forever. You have just another couple weeks to go, OP. I know it's hard, believe me I've been there. The early days are a time warp of sleeplessness and stress, but they do go faster than you fear. You can do this!

I hope this is at least somewhat helpful. Mazal tov on your new baby!


Thank you! It makes me feel better that I’m not the only one who feels that way
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amother
Green


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 10:25 pm
OP, I could've written this post myself. I feel the exact same way after birth. Every whimper coming from the carriage makes me over whelmed and nervous. I'm always on edge and have a very hard time relaxing. This is even while I'm on anti-anxiety meds. I always need to start a tiny dose in my third trimester, and I take it until baby is 6-8 weeks. I'm that regular normal lady out there, who people think are super geshikt and always managing. ....the newborn stage is really hard for some, and there's no denying it.
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amother
Aquamarine


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 10:32 pm
send me your newborn! Ill send her back to you when she's 3 mos old!! I would love to take care of a newborn without having to go through a pregnancy
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amother
Green


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 10:34 pm
amother [ Aquamarine ] wrote:
send me your newborn! Ill send her back to you when she's 3 mos old!! I would love to take care of a newborn without having to go through a pregnancy


I walk around saying the opposite. I have no issue carrying the baby, but I want the baby taken care of for the first three months.
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amother
Black


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 10:56 pm
I always wondered at this "sleep when the baby sleeps"...and clean when baby cleans? Fold laundry when baby does? Like how r we supposed to sleep if there's so much to do...lol.
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amother
Azure


 

Post Thu, Jun 11 2020, 11:39 pm
I find the baby's temperament is directly related to how well they are eating. Is she eating enough each feeding? Is she latching on well (when nursing or middle feeding) without getting too much air?
Investing in a good lactation consultant can do wonders!
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amother
Orchid


 

Post Fri, Jun 12 2020, 12:05 am
I have teenagers and I so miss the newborn stage!! Are you SD? If not, maybe you can have a teen come and hold your baby so you can rest. My kids get hired to do that.
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amother
Oak


 

Post Fri, Jun 12 2020, 12:29 am
I've always hated the newborn stage and never once missed it yet. All I can say is, it's blessedly short and it'll be over and done with soon!
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Pandabeer




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jun 12 2020, 1:12 pm
I never liked newborns when I was younger, even though most of them were good eat sleep etc. I couldn't wait till they got 3 months and older

But, now then I'm an older mom I really and truly appreciated my last newborns, fully appreciating the miracle that was gifted to my, an automatically, even though they cry almost mon stop, I try to hold on the their innocents and enjoy every minute of them. Bh
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