Another spinoff of keeping up with trends :)

yo'ma

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 8:02 am

When you were younger, did you care about that? That’s the poll*. And did your parents give in?

What about now, not specifically trends, but keeping up with the Cohens?

*Sorry if the third option offends anyone, but that’s how I see it.

singleagain

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 8:13 am

For a few years when I was younger. I davka went against the trends. The trends were long skirts, I wore shorter. When it was suddenly short skirts I switched to long.

That's the only one I remember, and only bc my mom told me.

amother

Maroon

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 8:16 am

I'm guessing by younger you meant at any period of time when I was younger. Until age 10 I didn't give a sh*t, lol, but then I started to care a little bit. I still care a little bit, but not a lot. I don't have to have whatever just came out this SEASON but I don't want to be a decade or two behind (clothing wise).

Ora in town

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 8:29 am

I was in a school with a lot of rich kids. And we were not.
My father told me that only stupid people buy brands... and I believed him. I never felt deprived because some kids wore expensive brands and I didn't. It just didn't intereset me. Genuinely... The topic never came up.

There are people who see immediatly how much you paid for the outfit you are wearing... I'm not like this...

So this is why I can't understand children who feel deprived because other children wear certain brands...
And I can't understand parents who give in to this pressure...

I'm fine with teens buying what they want, according to their taste... and if their taste is too expensive, they have a motivation to earn money to get what they want...

And I don't have much comprehension for people who look you up from head to toe and then back from toe to head (you see the price calculator working in their head), and according to the pricetag of your outfit decide to talk to you or not...

amother

Amber

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 8:33 am

Ora in town wrote:

I was in a school with a lot of rich kids. And we were not.
My father told me that only stupid people buy brands... and I believed him. I never felt deprived

I hope you've updated your beliefs on that.

silverlining3

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 9:00 am

I'd say till probably highschool I didn't care. After that I did alittle, but my mom always said, I'll allow it next year, when it's abit more in lol and brands, I really never understood to it.
These days I maybe understand more to it but not much. I buy whatever I like and looks good/cute on. I say, my kids are still young, not demanding specific clothing, I'm the mom, I buy what I like. I'll have enough when they grow up and develop their own taste and style.

Ora in town

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 9:02 am

amother [ Amber ] wrote:

I hope you've updated your beliefs on that.

I updated my beliefs in the sense that sometimes there are brands who offer good value for money. So I do not condemn people for wearing or using brand products.

However, I still have no respect whatsoever for anyone who judges other people according to the brands they use or wear... I am mostly indifferent to brands...

And I also try to teach my children that they should try to look at the substance, not primarily at the appearance...

There are some things I understand, e.g. that you need a certain communication equipment (read: whatsapp or the like) to be in the loop with your friends... But I would never pay an I-phone if a cheaper smartphone can do the trick... If the children still want it, they have to pay for the difference...

Last edited by Ora in town on Tue, Jun 16 2020, 2:08 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Burlywood

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 9:08 am

I doubt anyone will admit to having been obsessed with having the right clothes.

My take is that teenagers are developing their identity, and part of that means dressing to conform. So some kids get caught up in trends, though the healthy ones grow out of that need in early adulthood.

What's bizarre and kind of worrisome on this site is
- mothers asking about trends for babies. Seriously, all babies are beautiful. Your child is not a fashion accessory.
- mothers asking for teens. If your teenager cares she'll let you know what she wants, and you can negotiate accordingly. But if she's happy, let her be.

It's like there's a fear of not looking right. That's scary.

There's no reason to dress outlandishly, but if you need a uniform, ask yourself why.

bigsis144

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 9:56 am

I remember a particular Gap crewneck sweater with three buttons on the shoulder. It came in a zillion colors, and was practically the “uniform” at my Bais Yaakov on Rosh Chodesh when we were allowed to wear non-uniform clothes.

I remember going to the outlet mall and buying three of them, in pink, aqua and beige. I took them to seminary as well.

They were more expensive than other things I wore, but it was a normal enough item with enough rewearability that my mother agreed to indulge me.

Otherwise, I refused to wear anything with brand names on it - not backpacks or sweatshirts or patent leather “Bloomies bags” from Bloomingdales that the cool girls had... I was aware of trends, but took some amount of pride in not following them. (A) for not being a mindless follower and (B) for being a good daughter and “poor kid” and understanding that rich kids sometimes got stuff that I couldn’t and that was that.

amother

Natural

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 10:02 am

Totally trend obsessed when younger! Always with the right clothes, right shoes, handbag..
Nowadays I couldn't care less about trends or brands LOL

I just use whatever I think looks good!

amother

Gray

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 10:04 am

I cared a lot, but I only notice trends a bit too late after everyone has it and I already had something else, so the next year I'd want what everyone had only to find out that now it's something else.

Additionally my mother was very against spending money of any kind on anything that is not an absolute necessity. Trendy stuff were the ultimate evil because not only are they not necessary but they won't even be useful for long enough to justify their investment. The fact that she was so against it made me pretty desperate but also forced me to "not care" because I anyway couldn't have it.

So if you'd have seen me, you'd say I was my own person and did whatever I wanted, but inside I was really craving to be more like the other girls who knew just where to shop (sometimes it was Bergament, not necessarily brand names) and just what to buy before eeeeeveryone had it.

Lets_Eat_Pie

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 10:20 am

It's funny, I remember myself as marching to the beat of my own drummer and not caring about trends, but my mom remembers me pleading for slap bracelets (anyone remember those?) and branded clothing. There was a period of time where seemingly everyone was wearing sweatshirts that said GAP across the front - apparently I was very salty that I didn't have one!

amother

Amber

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 10:30 am

Ora in town wrote:

I updated my beliefs in the sense that sometimes there are brands who offer good value for money. So I do not condemn people for wearing or using brand products.

However, I still have no respect whatsoever for anyone who judges other people according to the brands they use or wear... I am mostly indifferent to brands...

And this is something a try to transmit to my children...

There are some things I understand, e.g. that you need a certain communication equipment (read: whatsapp or the like) to be in the loop with your friends... But I would never pay an I-phone if a cheaper smartphone can do the trick... If the children still want it, they have to pay for the difference...

What I was referring to was that "only stupid people buy brands...".

Of course teaching your children not to have respect for people who you perceive to be judgmental... is teaching your children to be judgmental.

LovesHashem

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 10:44 am

I don’t care about looking trendy. I feel like I have to have a lot of trends because I fall in love with them. The colors of the new season or a fresh new idea. I don’t buy something because it’s trendy. I buy cuz I love it.

As a child and teen I was pretty oblivious to trends.

amother

Apricot

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 10:47 am

I wished I had a knack for being trendy but we shopped in thrift stores and spent very little on clothing so while I was always clean and neat as a kid, I was never stylish. As a teenager when I was able to go shopping myself I started to develop a sense of style and seminary / Shana rishona I was dressed pretty updated. Once I had kids I couldn't keep it together anymore even though I'd often cringe looking at myself in the mirror. Now I'm starting to get back into it a little, I love feeling pretty and put together, it makes me feel good about myself. I don't blindly follow trends though, I choose the trends that I like and look good on me.

RuralIma

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 11:53 am

I never cared about trends or fitting in with the majority and I still don't. I always had a wide range of friends and an active social life, I wore what I liked, tried different things with my hair, I was just 100% my own person regardless of what anyone thought or what anyone else was choosing.

PeanutMama

Tue, Jun 16 2020, 12:20 pm

Ora in town wrote:

I agree with you on this and I’m the exact same way.
As long as the clothing is clean and tznius what does it matter??
Don’t get the obsession with brands...