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Want to make Aliyah but scared
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Rappel




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:06 pm
amother [ Babypink ] wrote:


I note you said 'even if I work' - unless you want to live in poverty (and there are people in Israel who are ok with that) - or unless your spouse is a millionaire - you DO need both spouses working in Israel, in most cases.


Or if you live out in the boonies Hi not that we're so far out, neither. Our rent is rising this summer to 1,200 shekels, so it doesn't bite the bank account too hard. We've been doing okay on one full-time paycheck, and I used to do writing for pocket change. I'll probably start working part-time out of the house after this kid, but it's been nice to just focus on the family these past few years.
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amother




Babypink
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:17 pm
Rappel wrote:
Or if you live out in the boonies Hi not that we're so far out, neither. Our rent is rising this summer to 1,200 shekels, so it doesn't bite the bank account too hard. We've been doing okay on one full-time paycheck, and I used to do writing for pocket change. I'll probably start working part-time out of the house after this kid, but it's been nice to just focus on the family these past few years.


Yes, or if you live out in the boonies. I actually don't know anywhere where rent is 1200 NIS so that must really be boonies, with low demand for housing.

If you can live out in a place with low housing demand and still find jobs, that could be a good option. But that all depends on what you need in your city/moshav.
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chanchy123




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:19 pm
amother [ Babypink ] wrote:
Im
So yeah, teaching salaries here are much lower. Most salaries here are much lower. On the flip side there is no real tuition for most schools (only sums like 1000 nis a year)..

This might be true for chiloni and chareidi schools but DL high schools run from 5000 mods a year to 23k a year.
Many parents also choose to send to semi-private elementary schools which also are in the 5k. There are scholarships though.
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amother




Blush
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:19 pm
Rappel wrote:
Or if you live out in the boonies Hi not that we're so far out, neither. Our rent is rising this summer to 1,200 shekels, so it doesn't bite the bank account too hard. We've been doing okay on one full-time paycheck, and I used to do writing for pocket change. I'll probably start working part-time out of the house after this kid, but it's been nice to just focus on the family these past few years.
But rappel, how big are we talking that you are paying that little? Is that a caravan? My sister lived out in the boonies, but also in a caravan, with little kids, when it was possible and payed pennies for rent.
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LovesHashem




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:20 pm
Rappel wrote:
Or if you live out in the boonies Hi not that we're so far out, neither. Our rent is rising this summer to 1,200 shekels, so it doesn't bite the bank account too hard. We've been doing okay on one full-time paycheck, and I used to do writing for pocket change. I'll probably start working part-time out of the house after this kid, but it's been nice to just focus on the family these past few years.


Where on earth is rent so cheap? Are you in a 2 room place that's 40 meters?
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amother




Babypink
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:22 pm
chanchy123 wrote:
This might be true for chiloni and chareidi schools but DL high schools run from 5000 mods a year to 23k a year.
Many parents also choose to send to semi-private elementary schools which also are in the 5k. There are scholarships though.


DL girls' high schools in my city cost around 4k a year. You pay for all the extra hours. I don't know how much the boys' cost.

I think that 4-5 k is average for a dati leumi city high school. You are right, I forgot to mention it.

Once you get to huge sums, that is for boarding schools. Very few in my community send. But I guess it depends on locale, you need to research where people send.

As for elementary - I always send to regular dati leumi schools. I don't like the whole idea behind the semi-private exclusionary dati leumi Noam type schools. But yeah, those who send will need to pay.
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Rappel




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:23 pm
amother [ Babypink ] wrote:
Yes, or if you live out in the boonies. I actually don't know anywhere where rent is 1200 NIS so that must really be boonies, with low demand for housing.

If you can live out in a place with low housing demand and still find jobs, that could be a good option. But that all depends on what you need in your city/moshav.


Itamar. We're 45 minutes east of Petah Tikva, one hour north of Yerushalayim. We rent a 3 room eshkubit, with a garden.
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Rappel




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:26 pm
amother [ Blush ] wrote:
But rappel, how big are we talking that you are paying that little? Is that a caravan? My sister lived out in the boonies, but also in a caravan, with little kids, when it was possible and payed pennies for rent.


It's the same size as a caravan, but made out of concrete and foam insulation, and with a different layout. There are other rentals with more space and another bedroom for 1400, but we don't need that yet.
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amother




Blush
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:26 pm
Rappel wrote:
Itamar. We're 45 minutes east of Petah Tikva, one hour north of Yerushalayim. We rent a 3 room eshkubit, with a garden.
So then rappel, like I said above, my sister did that too. But you cant compare paying peanuts for a caravan (I was inside those, my sister lived in one for 4 years) to where most families will want to live, not in a caravan Smile
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amother




Babypink
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:29 pm
Rappel wrote:
Itamar. We're 45 minutes east of Petah Tikva, one hour north of Yerushalayim. We rent a 3 room eshkubit, with a garden.


There are areas over the 'green line' which are very cheap, due to perceived safety issues or boonie issues.

But finding even a small place with a garden for 1200 is a very lucky find.

Is there a va'adat kabalah in Itamar or can anyone just decide to move there?
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amother




Babypink
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:32 pm
amother [ Blush ] wrote:
So then rappel, like I said above, my sister did that too. But you cant compare paying peanuts for a caravan (I was inside those, my sister lived in one for 4 years) to where most families will want to live, not in a caravan Smile


How many square meters approximately is a caravan or an 'eshkubit'?
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Rappel




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:36 pm
amother [ Babypink ] wrote:
There are areas over the 'green line' which are very cheap, due to perceived safety issues or boonie issues.

But finding even a small place with a garden for 1200 is a very lucky find.

Is there a va'adat kabalah in Itamar or can anyone just decide to move there?


There is a vaad klitah. To pass, you need to be shomer Shabbat, sane, and breathing. Smile

I reckon our eshkubit is 45-50 meters squared. Again, there are larger eshkubiyot, and there are private houses for rent as well for not much. But we're trying to save on a single income, so we're keeping costs low.
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amother




cornflower
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:36 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thank you for your post. I’m actually glad someone said that because I always used to hear it from my husband and I thought he just doesn’t like her. My mom is getting older and unfortunately she is alone. Even though my sister and brother live over there, they’re not in the same cities. On Shabbat, my mom is alone and I know if I’ll move she’ll want us to do all shabbats and holidays together because I’m the only daughter in the family that is keeping the religion. However, my husband told me that if she stagers criticizing and telling us what to do, he will speak up. Right now my mom has a neutral relationship with him, he really doesn’t like her, she doesn’t know it because he is not speaking up. I’m afraid that might happen one day if we move and I don’t want to not speak to my mom but also need shalom bayit. Most likely I’ll look for a place to live not in the same city (where she lives the city is expensive anyway). I wish I could help my mom and be closer to her but not if she will interfere with things between me and my husband.

Look, here in Israel, sane people understand that a 2.5-hour trip means 5 hours of travel, 2.5 there and 2.5 back. People who are not emotionally healthy don't see that as 5 hours, they think you owe it to them to be there when they want you, no matter what.

And since you're looking into the center of the country, chances are you'll be no more than 45-60 minutes away, which is nothing, and which may make her think she can obligate you to visit for whatever Shabbatot and chagim she wants you there for.

If you have a strong backbone, know where you're going to draw the line, and are okay with putting your foot down, then no big deal. But if not, you might want to rethink either aliya or life in the center of the country, and focus on either finding a place to live in the US, or searching for a place to live in the Arava or Galil.

My two cents.
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amother




Babypink
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:43 pm
Will your mom at some point be open to moving to a different city?
It's extremely difficult taking care of an elderly parent who lives in a different city. You might not want to live next to her now, but at some point, if she needs help, she will likely need to live in the city of one of the siblings.
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amother




cornflower
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 4:43 pm
amother [ Babypink ] wrote:
Yes, or if you live out in the boonies. I actually don't know anywhere where rent is 1200 NIS so that must really be boonies, with low demand for housing.

If you can live out in a place with low housing demand and still find jobs, that could be a good option. But that all depends on what you need in your city/moshav.

My rent used to be 1,200 NIS. You could probably call where I live the "boonies." 78 square meters.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 5:01 pm
amother [ Babypink ] wrote:
Will your mom at some point be open to moving to a different city?
It's extremely difficult taking care of an elderly parent who lives in a different city. You might not want to live next to her now, but at some point, if she needs help, she will likely need to live in the city of one of the siblings.

Yes, my mom doesn't care where, as long as I move to Israel of course.
I'm not sure what she's really thinking, I see how she asks my sister and her husband sometimes to drive her to cities just to buy somethings. She doesn't ask them to come over on holidays because they're not as observant. But we are, and I know she feels the most "comfortable" with me.

I like being independant and not being close to her, but NY and Israel is very far away and I understand why she dislikes taking the long trip here once in awhile.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 5:07 pm
I know that living in settlements over the green line would be much cheaper. But I can't live there, mostly because my husband wouldn't want to live there and safety issues. I would love to get out of a city, but my husband is American and it's not enough I want to take him to a different country, I don't want to also take him to a small settlement that is far away from places.

So I have to do some more research about the communities. I understand the center is expensive. So maybe somewhere not far away from the center? It is really hard to find the perfect place, of course. My main concern is the schools, I really need good schools for my kids. One has an anxiety disorder, the other just gets speech and SETSS at school. I know in Israel the classes are even bigger, that's going to be another thing for them to get used to. The kid with the anxiety issue needs a lot of attention and it will be difficult with larger classes.
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mandksima




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 5:52 pm
chanchy123 wrote:
This might be true for chiloni and chareidi schools but DL high schools run from 5000 mods a year to 23k a year.
Many parents also choose to send to semi-private elementary schools which also are in the 5k. There are scholarships though.


My two oldest just finished high school. We managed to find the right schools for them which happened to be reshet schools, one of AMIT and one of Emunah. They are subsidized and we paid only 1000 shekels a year. One included transportation, the other we had to buy monthly bus passes but received a bit of the price back from the ministry of ed.

Now, one school was special ed and one was a trade school. Neither were the highly sought after very intellectual schools but you never know what each kid will need, want or be accepted into. I have friends that pay a ton every year in elite schools and the parents pushed for it but it is not necessary. We didn't look at these schools with the price in mind and only found out after we decided we wanted the schools.
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amother




Azure
 

Post  Mon, Jun 29 2020, 11:20 pm
On a side note, I wouldn't write of a settlement because of safety issues. There are some which are extremely safe (more so than a mixed city where Arabs are allowed in freely). I've family in a yishuv 15 mins from Ariel and they have an amazing quality of life. 2 storey house, big garden all around with fruit trees and a pond etc.... it's heaven to visit them! Husband commutes to work in Bet Shemesh and wife works as a nurse in Jslm.
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amother




Blonde
 

Post  Tue, Jun 30 2020, 1:16 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
I know that living in settlements over the green line would be much cheaper. But I can't live there, mostly because my husband wouldn't want to live there and safety issues. I would love to get out of a city, but my husband is American and it's not enough I want to take him to a different country, I don't want to also take him to a small settlement that is far away from places.

So I have to do some more research about the communities. I understand the center is expensive. So maybe somewhere not far away from the center? It is really hard to find the perfect place, of course. My main concern is the schools, I really need good schools for my kids. One has an anxiety disorder, the other just gets speech and SETSS at school. I know in Israel the classes are even bigger, that's going to be another thing for them to get used to. The kid with the anxiety issue needs a lot of attention and it will be difficult with larger classes.


And you want to move them?
The one with anxiety issue can be broken here!!
Op your children are much more important than your mother.(specially with someone with bad character..)
I am scared you are doing a big mistake!!
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