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“Seminary girl halacha”
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BH Yom Yom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 1:03 am
Wondering if anyone else experienced finding out that certain practices are not actually halacha but “everyone” seems to do it.

Example: bouncing 3 times after taking 3 steps forward at the end of shmoneh esrei. A Rav I know was giving a shiur on hilchos tefilla and explained when to step back, forward, wait 4 seconds/ time it takes to walk dalet amos before sitting, etc. One of the women in the shiur asked about how many times to do the “bouncing thing” - to which the Rav said, “What bouncing thing?” And after we described it, he said, “That’s not halacha...sounds like ‘seminary girl halacha’ - I.e. made up.”

Apparently the bouncing thing is uncommon among men. Sometimes women and girls finish shmoneh esrei right as the shaliach tzibbur gets to kedusha, so they bounce by kadosh, kadosh, kadosh...but barring that, apprently there is no mekor for stam bouncing.

Curious to hear what other practices are out there that are not actually verified halacha/minhag!
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amother
Vermilion


 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 1:07 am
Delete
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 1:18 am
Not using the water leftover in a cup someone else used to wash. (Not sure I make sense - like when the person in front of you washes and you think you have to spill the water out from the cup before refilling it).
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BH Yom Yom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 1:22 am
amother [ Jetblack ] wrote:
Not using the water leftover in a cup someone else used to wash. (Not sure I make sense - like when the person in front of you washes and you think you have to spill the water out from the cup before refilling it).


Yes!! I still out of habit feel like I need to dump it out. I dont want to see
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giselle




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 1:24 am
BH Yom Yom wrote:
Wondering if anyone else experienced finding out that certain practices are not actually halacha but “everyone” seems to do it.

Example: bouncing 3 times after taking 3 steps forward at the end of shmoneh esrei. A Rav I know was giving a shiur on hilchos tefilla and explained when to step back, forward, wait 4 seconds/ time it takes to walk dalet amos before sitting, etc. One of the women in the shiur asked about how many times to do the “bouncing thing” - to which the Rav said, “What bouncing thing?” And after we described it, he said, “That’s not halacha...sounds like ‘seminary girl halacha’ - I.e. made up.”

Apparently the bouncing thing is uncommon among men. Sometimes women and girls finish shmoneh esrei right as the shaliach tzibbur gets to kedusha, so they bounce by kadosh, kadosh, kadosh...but barring that, apprently there is no mekor for stam bouncing.

Curious to hear what other practices are out there that are not actually verified halacha/minhag!

It’s weird, because I don’t really know adults who still do this, but the girls are still taught to do it this way by their teachers. I don’t get why the teachers are teaching it like this.
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Angolama




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 1:28 am
BH Yom Yom wrote:
Wondering if anyone else experienced finding out that certain practices are not actually halacha but “everyone” seems to do it.

Example: bouncing 3 times after taking 3 steps forward at the end of shmoneh esrei. A Rav I know was giving a shiur on hilchos tefilla and explained when to step back, forward, wait 4 seconds/ time it takes to walk dalet amos before sitting, etc. One of the women in the shiur asked about how many times to do the “bouncing thing” - to which the Rav said, “What bouncing thing?” And after we described it, he said, “That’s not halacha...sounds like ‘seminary girl halacha’ - I.e. made up.”

Apparently the bouncing thing is uncommon among men. Sometimes women and girls finish shmoneh esrei right as the shaliach tzibbur gets to kedusha, so they bounce by kadosh, kadosh, kadosh...but barring that, apprently there is no mekor for stam bouncing.

Curious to hear what other practices are out there that are not actually verified halacha/minhag!


If you daven in shul, you are supposed to wait in place after you finish shemona esrei and take 3 steps back, until the chazan is up to kedusha, and then take 3 steps forward and answer kedusha. That is where the "bouncing" comes from. FWIW
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BH Yom Yom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 1:35 am
Angolama wrote:
If you daven in shul, you are supposed to wait in place after you finish shemona esrei and take 3 steps back, until the chazan is up to kedusha, and then take 3 steps forward and answer kedusha. That is where the "bouncing" comes from. FWIW


That makes sense. My question is more when girls and women are davening alone or with their class (ie no men around).
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#Happymom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 1:40 am
Bouncing is rubbish.
Remember when I was taught in sem that it has no mekor, we were all shocked!!
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Iymnok




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 2:00 am
"A potato kugel baked in a fleishig oven after chicken makes you fleishigs"
Inaccurate. You can eat it even with dairy.
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silverlining3




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 2:58 am
If I remember correctly. You do not have to bend over when answering amen yehei shmei rabba. A relative's teacher said, a woman probably just then bent over to pick up something from the floor and that how the 'halacha' was passed on. Ha Although I never learnt about it, I always did it cuz I saw everyone doing so. But atleast the girls now are being taught its not halacha.
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ExtraCredit




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 3:00 am
You’re allowed to talk LH all day except for your designated hour.
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LovesHashem




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 3:17 am
amother [ Jetblack ] wrote:
Not using the water leftover in a cup someone else used to wash. (Not sure I make sense - like when the person in front of you washes and you think you have to spill the water out from the cup before refilling it).


I learned this is high school in halacha class.
DH says he's pretty sure this is halacha too. He's looking for a source.

Maybe I learned wrong, does anyone have a source?


Last edited by LovesHashem on Sun, Jun 28 2020, 3:29 am; edited 1 time in total
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silverlining3




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 3:22 am
Surplus wrote:
You’re allowed to talk LH all day except for your designated hour.


Haha good one
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yc




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 5:30 am
waving your hands 3 times when you light shabbos candles

btw, I don't think its so nice to call it 'seminary girl halacha' what does it have to do with seminary girls. how about made up halacha?
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BH Yom Yom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 6:59 am
yc wrote:
waving your hands 3 times when you light shabbos candles

btw, I don't think its so nice to call it 'seminary girl halacha' what does it have to do with seminary girls. how about made up halacha?


Interesting, I remember learning that the waving the hands was a definitive mesorah. Maybe I learned wrong?

LOL I called this post “seminary girl halacha” because it seems like (at least according to the Rav who coimed the phrase) made up halacha gets propagated the most by seminary girls.
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#Happymom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 7:26 am
yc wrote:
waving your hands 3 times when you light shabbos candles

btw, I don't think its so nice to call it 'seminary girl halacha' what does it have to do with seminary girls. how about made up halacha?


Nope! Nope!
It is an actual halacha, there is a reason we do it 3 times, and we wave our hands inwards.
I just read abt it, will look it up IYH
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yc




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 7:48 am
https://www.chabad.org/library.....s.htm

"Editor's Note:

There appears to be no source for the hand-waving in classic rabbinic literature. Rather, it seems to be an outgrowth of an older custom to cover the candles until the blessing is made."
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esther11




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 8:10 am
I always called these “camp halachos”. Same idea, that you learn in sleep away camp from other girls when on a spiritual high. But not necessarily Halacha Smile

Another example: It is assur to rip grass, and if you pull do, a malach dies.
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yc




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 8:15 am
Or that you're not allowed to brush your hair on tisha b'av - that came from camp.
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 28 2020, 8:23 am
What a sexist term. Not impressed with that Rav. I would not go to someone who speaks like with a shaylah, thats for sure.

Everything has a source, whether or not it is based in halacha.
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