Basement or Westgate?

amother

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 11:39 am

OK, I need to some advise. Can't decide....

What's worse - to live in a big basement apt or Westgate?

I need my kids to have friends (she has one but she is very flighty) and I hate the basement...
But my husband hates that you live so close to each other in Westgate.

Oysh!

What would you choose??

amother

Pearl

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 11:50 am

It's a personality thing.
Some people constantly need people around them. Some people hate having people constantly around them. If you like bungalow style life, and want to see all your neighbors every time you open your front door, Westgate is for you. I personally lived in a basement for 8+ years and loved it. My kids had friends. My only complaint was not having a view out the window.

amother

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 12:01 pm

So I live on a street and everyone is basically to themselves.

At this point in my life I want to see people but my husband is the opposite and hates meeting people right when he steps out of the house.

amother

Chartreuse

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 12:24 pm

amother [ Smokey ] wrote:

Moved from a basement to westgate and couldn’t be happier that I did.

Are you me??

I love it here!! Brand new big house. I love in the new section all the way at the end so we have more privacy.

amother

Salmon

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 12:29 pm

OP - I just moved out of westgate back in November to Toms River and my kids don't stop begging me to move back there!!! I lived in the rentals and for a growing family - you can't give your kids a happier childhood. Kids everywhere- tons of activities, carnivals, action. You will never ever have a hard time finding a friend in westgate for your children.

I know this sounds crazy but sometimes I think that I made a mistake and I should move back to Westgate!

Last edited by amother on Thu, Jul 02 2020, 6:54 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 12:37 pm

Thank you guys so much for responding!!!

I wish I could move to the new houses.
I am more looking at the 1465 rentals.

Is it weird that its such a diverse crowd? (We consider ourselves regular yeshivish)

amother

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 12:39 pm

And do your husbands like it as well?

Is my husband gonna go crazy? He loves the spacious rooms - the house itself
but hates the fact that you literally live on top of each other.
Whats it like?

amother

Forestgreen

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 1:04 pm

In my area it's buildings or basements. Though I know my kids would have more friends (and I probably would too) if I lived in a buliding, my husband doesnt want to. His reason is that he's not interested in seeing other women all day. In a basement it's a lot better in that regard.

In Lakewood seeing tons of made up women might be inevitable unlike where I live though. So this totally might not apply to you I just wanted to share it because knowing why my husband doesn't want to live on top of other people all day made it clear to me that I want to respect his decision.

amother

Chartreuse

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 1:07 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

So wait until the new houses are ready. Should be soon. They are beautiful!

I love diversity. But it’s a personality thing.

amother

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 1:09 pm

amother [ Chartreuse ] wrote:

So wait until the new houses are ready. Should be soon. They are beautiful!

I love diversity. But it’s a personality thing.

Yeah but they are 1690 range I think. Its too expensive for us right now.

amother

Chartreuse

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 1:09 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

And do your husbands like it as well?

Is my husband gonna go crazy? He loves the spacious rooms - the house itself
but hates the fact that you literally live on top of each other.
Whats it like?

Can’t tell you because my dh loves people. Although there are a few yeshivish neighbors of mine who hate it here. (The men, not the women- the women love it.) if your close minded and very in the box you won’t like it here.

Also we have an end unit which gives us more privacy.

amother

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 1:21 pm

amother [ Chartreuse ] wrote:

They gave us a choice between a more private unit but that one had attached porch( such a shud)

and the other one is more in a ally and that one has a private porch.

I can not have an attached porch.

amother

Smokey

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 3:35 pm

I’ve lived in the alleys (with a private porch) and now live in the bigger ones with attached porch and it’s really not a big deal. (And the attached porches are way bigger) my husband wouldn’t move away if you paid him. He loves it here, he his shul, his shiur, his guys etc.

amother

Lime

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 4:06 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

And do your husbands like it as well?

Is my husband gonna go crazy? He loves the spacious rooms - the house itself
but hates the fact that you literally live on top of each other.
Whats it like?

I live in Westgate but not in the rentals. We own a house on the other side so most of our view on Westgate won't be relative to you.

One thing my husband absolutely HATES is the lack of space and choice in the Westgate shuls.

Maybe he can daven in Lutsk if you live on that side but the shul situation in Westgate is not one to ignore.

I do find it ironic that people are saying that Westgate is diverse. My husband who learnt in Brisk for three years and kollel for ten years feels out of place for not being Yeshivish enough (he did get a degree afterward and currently works in a non-Jewish professional office so relatively speaking he isn't as Yeshivish as he once was)

amother

Chartreuse

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 6:18 pm

amother [ Lime ] wrote:

The other side of westgate is very yeshivish. The rentals are much more diverse.

amother

Mustard

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 6:34 pm

I think it’s better for kids when they are not in a basement. For some reason there is a stigma attached to living in a basement apartment. I know they are big and airy in Lakewood but as your kids grow up they will feel a little ashamed at some point if you are still in a basement. I wish that weren’t the reality but it is.
The issue of your husband not being comfortable with lots of neighbors is not one to ignore. I just read today that R’ Avigdor Miller said that we should make decisions that best benefit our children even if it’s uncomfortable for us. We want our children to grow up happy and emotionally well. It might be a problem for your children if your husband doesn’t want lots of neighbors and your children do.
I think westgate is a great place to live providing your husband will be happy with the shuls and with the home you choose.

amother

cornflower

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 6:36 pm

Another thing to take into account is if you want your kids to be raised in a development. They tend to produce a certain type of kid.