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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Teenagers and Older children
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amother
OP
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 Thu, Jul 02 2020, 12:17 pm
I finally had a nice dmc with my teenage son today, he basically told me that his “default” feeling is being down and upset about life. He is a great person and has many friends and is super athletic. I sincerely believe that the fact that he has been listening to rap music the past 4 years has affected him tremendously. There is no way constantly listening to people wanting to kill or be killed is not having a major influence on his life. I have tried many times to convince him of this.
Are there any articles that you can find that he can read or something that I can show him that this is not just his overly concerned mother talking. He’s a very logical kid, so seeing studies - that are NOT religiously backed - will be very helpful to us.
I am not looking for advice about depression here - I am totally open to that being a possibility, but I want to explore this first.
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dancingqueen
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Thu, Jul 02 2020, 5:27 pm
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Which rappers does he like? Rap is not all horrible, some is empowering.
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amother
Azure
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Thu, Jul 02 2020, 5:28 pm
| dancingqueen wrote: | | Which rappers does he like? Rap is not all horrible, some is empowering. |
Rap isn't an inherently bad art form, but there happens to be a culture of rappers that is not great.
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amother
OP
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Thu, Jul 02 2020, 6:00 pm
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I don’t know exactly but I’ve heard them - the cursing the negativity and anger. Not empowering at all. And I’m not totally sheltered, I myself have a hard time not listening to other types of non-Jewish music. But this stuff is horrible.
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amother
Slateblue
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Thu, Jul 02 2020, 6:05 pm
I am in a similar situation although my son is a number of years older, thus more independent and not really in a place where he’s discussing this with me or open to discussing much. He lives independently Bh so I most often don’t have to listen.
His habit only started about two years ago and he listens to hard metal. While not all the lyrics are bad per se, the style and screaming is really awful and the whole thing is just against anything related to Judaism.
And yes... it affects him in more ways than one.
Following...
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amother
Amber
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Thu, Jul 02 2020, 6:54 pm
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I definitely was very dark as a teen. I felt very similar to your son. I don't know anything about the rap but I can tell you that I'm an upbeat energetic happy mom and wife today!
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amother
Blush
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Thu, Jul 02 2020, 7:26 pm
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Maybe he could listen to Nissim Black, who's a frum convert who raps and is extremely talented? And maybe you could reach out to Nissim Black and ask him for recommendations of other "wholesom" (or at least, less problematic) rappers that you could steer your son toward?
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legendarysales
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Fri, Mar 04 2022, 3:04 pm
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I listen to all rap and highly appreciate the talent and skill involved in the genre I don't think that rap music can depress like that in fact the opposite it is very empowering and has helped me a lot
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amother
Azure
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Fri, Mar 04 2022, 4:20 pm
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It's an old thread. But I'll reiterate what I said in 2020: it's not about rap as a medium, but there is a lot of awful rap out there. If jazz music, pop music, etc. had the same type of lyrics, that would also be bad. But there are a lot more rap tracks along the lines of "I hate this other rapper, here are the violent things I would do to him, I am bragging about how much money I'm getting from the sales of this track which make me better than him" or "women are objects and I own so many" or "here is a highly detailed description of what physical features I like in a woman" than there are in other genres.
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legendarysales
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Fri, Mar 04 2022, 4:40 pm
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I understand but I don't think our kids listening to rap take that message from it
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