Is the school responsible to pay for therapy?

amother

Peach

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 4:01 am

school's really don't usually pay for this kind of thing - just asking for money probably will get you no where. They will say they consulted thier Rav and they are not chayav ( not necessarily true but let me bet you if they consult a rav the will present the case in a way that doesn't leave them responsible)

your options are
a) speak to a lawyer on your chances of winning a lawsuit and evaluate if it's worth going thru. Chances are they will take a settlement but you don't have guarantee's so make sure it is really financially worth it.

b) Take them to a din torah - again speak to someone knowledgeable (toen or just a very well versed rav) about your chances for winning. This may be better then a lawsuit because it drags there name in the mud and looks really bad so they may agree to negotiate to avoid - but on the other hand beis din has "no teeth" to enforce. Again only do this if you are actually confident you will win

c) speak to a halachic authority about withholding tuition to cover the therapy.

If I was in the situation I would not trust the school. I would find an affordable therapist on my own and if at all possible switch dd to a new school to give her a fresh start in a place that she could trust the staff are in her best interest.

amother

Babypink

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 6:28 am

You're being very vague so it's hard to know how you would go about suing. Generally for civil cases in the US unless there's physical injury, you would probably have to show an obvious breach of duty of care, or that they knowingly and willfully did something to cause her emotional distress, or overt discrimination.

I'm with the person who said that if the school messed up so badly that she needs weekly therapy, I'd pull her out. I certainly wouldn't be shelling out 300 dollars a week to a therapist of their recommendation even if that person works in another department. If her experience there caused her so much trauma, how is she not retraumatized by having to go back? How can she heal?

watergirl

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 7:31 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

There were changes in the school and there was a serious fallout which affected dd negatively.(Sorry for being vague, I'm trying to be confidential) I'd be rich if I could cash in the amount of sorries we were recipients of. Unfortunately, sorry isn't a currency that pays for services. And unfortunately no competent insurance therapist locally. And the school referred us to this therapist and made the arrangements.

There is a world in between and incompetent therapist who takes insurance versus a $300 per session therapist! So the school referred you to this one and even made the arrangements… Sorry, no way would I go to this person. I’m sure there’s somebody who charges a more reasonable rate where you live.

thatworn

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 7:44 am

Why do you want your daughter in a school that "messed up", then chose a therapist who supposedly can help with repairing the damage, while charging like a wounded bull along the way? Even if this is the only frum school in your area, even if this is the only school that you think fits your family hashkafically, get your daughter out of that school, pronto. it sounds like a dangerous and completely unprofessional place. If you're worried about your family's reputation, or that your younger children will have no school to go to, weigh this up against your dd being messed up and the ramifications this can have on her feelings towards chinuch, education, frumkeit and life in general.

amother

Periwinkle

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 8:15 am

Im sorry your dc had this happen. Is this a physical injury caused by neglect or a s-xual abuse case by one of their workers? Consult a rav first, about suing if there was negligence and caused your child harm. Like other imamothers, I would not take their therapist recommendation and I would take my child out of the school.

amother

Linen

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 8:43 am

My DD was bullied in school after her class was mixed with other classes, she wasn't put with any of her friends (whom we were told to write down, to what end I'm not sure) which impacted her socially. A girl who picked on her, no support system, etc...

It never dawned on me to expect the school to pay. School isn't responsible for my daughter's social life, they are educating her. Plus, perhaps someone else would've stood up to the bully. My daughter's personality comes into play here, not the school's fault.

I spent a small fortune in social skills therapy, which helped build my daughter up.

This was lots of years ago. As an adult, she's healthy and had a great social circle. It's all a distant memory.

OP, your details are very vague, so there's not enough for any of us to know what role/responsibility the school has here, even if they said sorry (so did DD's school), and even if their machinations played a role in impacting your daughter socially.

And unless you have another school lined up for her, be prepared to homeschool her if you take this suing/negotiating route.

Perhaps the community has funding that can help? That's something to pursue. Consult your LOR, he may have leads that can help too.

amother

Seagreen

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 10:16 am

Suing the school is an awful, awful idea. You think your dd has social problems now?!

If my children's school, a community institution, was being sued by a student it would be absolute social suicide for the entire family.

amother

Ivory

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 10:25 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Severe social impact.

Call an attorney and ask for a consultation. But I honestly cannot imagine what a school could do that would require it to pay for therapy, but that you would leave your child in the school.

The only thing I can come up with is severe bullying that was sanctioned by teachers or administration, but why would you keep your kid there?

But talk to a professional.

amother

Mauve

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 10:36 am

Is this thread for real?

If your child suffered so greatly to the extent that only a $300 a week therapist can help her now, if sounds like she had underlying issues that were going unnoticed.

Suing the school is a terrible, awful, ridiculous Idea that won’t get you want you want ($) and won’t help your child at all.

amother

Brown

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 10:54 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Negotiating as in lets say, we pay half, school other half.

No, not gonna happen.
For many reasons.
If you think you have a case, consult with a lawyer.
I work in education and have seen lawsuits brought by parents. Only ones that were successful involved not implementing IEPs properly. And they didn't get money to pay for outside services. Just got tuition at highly specialized special ed schools covered.

watergirl

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 11:37 am

amother [ Mauve ] wrote:

And then I would imagine the school would not welcome the family back.

watergirl

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 11:46 am

Once, my daughter was in lower elementary school she went to the bathroom and the stall door came off the hinges and landed on her. She had a concision as per the school nurse so they had me pick her up and recommended I take her to a specific place for imaging and a checkup, etc. So I took her and since I was not familiar with the area, I took her to the wrong place super far away and it cost a few hundred dollars. She was BH fine, but the bill was too high for me to pay. But - had I done a tiny bit of research, I would have realized I went to the wrong office, there was a closer and cheaper one close by with a similar name. Or I would have thought to call my pediatrician before rushing to go... anything else. So the mistake was really mine and the cost did not HAVE to be so high. In theory I could have asked the school to pay because it was their door that fell on her. But the rest was on me.

amother

Indigo

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 1:44 pm

Are you planning to still keep her in this school? Then no way in hell should you sue or take them to din Torah.
And like somebody else posted, you will have way more issues if you do that.
You should also be asking around for a therapist who can take your insurance or doesn’t take $300.

ladYdI

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 1:50 pm

There is an organization in Lakewood that pays half if therapy sessions. Keren Ezer linefesh.
There is an agency in Brooklyn that can help with therapy comfort health, a division of hamaspik. Ujo of Williamsburg has some funding for therapy.

Tzippy323

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 4:41 pm

Are you saying that the school failed to implement the services and goals on her iep? If so, it is quite possible you can file for extended school year services, and file for an impartial review for reimbursement. I must say, however, if you didn’t go on record as having filed that the iep wasn’t properly implemented you may have a hard time because you did not allow the district an opportunity to correct the problem.