Child is afraid | Imamother

amother

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 9:58 pm

My 6 year old son is afraid to go to the bathroom if an older sibling or adult is not outside the door. He is also afraid to go to his room at night or go to sleep without his 9-year-old brother. He sits outside of his bedroom door for a very long time until his brother's time to go to sleep. I have tried many things, including giving him a night light, leaving the door open, giving him a "r'ziel hamalach," and lying down with him for a very long time. He won't fall asleep until his brother comes. I even tried having his brother go to "sleep" early, but my 6-year-old somehow senses that his brother is not actually there to stay the night, and he can't fall asleep. He is a zombie every day. His behavior has become very difficult because he is always tired. My husband and I really have no clue how to deal with this. We would appreciate any tips that have worked for other families.

(We know what prompted his fear. Someone told him a story about "The Skull of a Genius" and it frightened him terribly.)

amother

Rose

Thu, Jul 02 2020, 10:14 pm

Talk him through his fears ask him what bothers him. Reasure him kindly your there to help him in this matter. Check your mazuzahs.say whole shema with him every night .
Have you left him with a babysitter you could trust. Make bedtime fun nice story read ask what he likes best about his day, and worst part of day !!
Could he have been touched inappropriately ?

Last edited by amother on Thu, Jul 02 2020, 10:17 pm; edited 1 time in total

mamma llama

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 1:54 am

(I don't know that story, but I can gather from the title...)
Maybe you can discuss the story with him and help him come up with an alternate/happier ending to the story. That way when he thinks of the story, he'll think of the new ending and have a positive association.

Hatzlacha!

Rappel

Fri, Jul 03 2020, 7:20 am

mamma llama wrote:

I like this solution. When I had bad dreams as a kid, that was how my mum would help me resolve them: she would have me imagine a better/stronger ending, where I overcame wherever scared me , and that usually gave me the confidence to fall back asleep.