Would you drive for an hour to attend wedding of Askan, if

amother

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 1:31 am

Would you drive for an hour to attend a wedding of Askan who did favors for you and the entire world, even if only to say Mazel Tov for a short while, if youre over 60?

What else would be a thoughtful way to show you want to be Mesameach the family?

mamma llama

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 1:40 am

If you chose not to go, you could give a gift and write a letter about how much they mean to you and that you wish you could be there and you are sharing in their simcha.

You could also call/video-call a few days before the wedding to give a personal mazel tov.

amother

Taupe

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 1:54 am

I would not go. Even with antibodies-which prove nothing, I would not go.

Send flowers/chocolate/a candy platter for the aufruf or sheva brachot.

They will really not remember who did or didn't show up, the gas (ok it is cheap now) costs also, and the platter /flowers will leave much more of an impression-especially when they are not busy with dozens (or hundreds) or people.

amother

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 2:10 am

amother [ Taupe ] wrote:

Its a son and Aufruf is over.

amother

Slategray

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 2:10 am

I would not. I don't think trying to enlarge weddings for the simcha of the chosson and kallah, and even more so for the parents, is the right thing to do right now.

I am young and low risk, and would feel it irresponsible myself to go.

IMHO, chasunas during such a time should be for the people whose absence would be felt, not for those whose presence would enhance.

So close relatives and friends, yes - neighbors and acquaintances, no.

The sentiment is very beautiful, though, and I agree that sending a thoughtful card, plus ideally a check or gift for the young couple, would be most appreciated.

(ETA: I would say the same even if the chasuna was right around the corner and not an hour away.)

amother

Taupe

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 2:11 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Its a son and Aufruf is over.

So send a check and nice card to ten young couple.

amother

Jetblack

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 2:17 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

The biggest favor you can do in return, during Covid, is to stay at home.

twizzlers1

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 2:37 am

I say to stay home! I agree that even if it was close I would not go. I've seen some zoom weddings lately that are supposed to be small and there are so many people all squished together. but I'm a person that goes out regularly but I am under 60 and I'm careful when I go out.

PinkFridge

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 9:02 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Only if I had antibodies.
It could be very meaningful if you go, but so understandable if you don't. A note, a gift for the young couple, if these askanim are people of means, a donation to a tzedaka near and dear to their heart are all fine. I would say not to go.

amother

Mustard

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 9:53 am

Very thought fun of you -- unless it were a close family member or best friend I would not go and think people totally understand and even appreciate it.

would send a warm appreciative card and check/gift

oif simchos!

amother

Jade

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 10:09 am

I love sending over breakfast the day of the wedding (I have a local place deliver, Either bagels and spreads with OJ or just a doz muffins)

amother

Black

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 10:15 am

No - I would not go if it were around the corner.

I wouldn't go even if it were a close relative unless there was a way for me to socially distance safely. and then I would stay for a few minutes and not go inside where there were people and the virus could be at high levels. And I would mask up and disinfect.

Inside for a long period of time with people who are probably not all wearing masks and who aren't social distancing Banging head

I don't know how people are even asking these questions. There are so many stories of family parties and gatherings in which many people became infected because there was someone asymptomatic.

pause

Sun, Jul 05 2020, 10:17 am

amother [ Jade ] wrote:

I love sending over breakfast the day of the wedding (I have a local place deliver, Either bagels and spreads with OJ or just a doz muffins)

Great idea!
This gesture will also be way more meaningful and memorable than your attendance at the wedding.