Some place to quarantine

amother

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 6:24 pm

Mazal tov! My nephew is engaged. He lives in one of the communities that doesnt mask or socially distance AT ALL and is having a completely normal wedding. My son is his age and desperate to go but my mother lives with us and is both older and immunosuppressed. We live in a small apartment with one bathroom so it would be impossible to isolate him for 2 weeks. Can anyone think of somewhere safe he could live aftwr the wedding for 2 weeks until we are sure he is fine? NY area.

Elfrida

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 6:41 pm

You can't ask anyone to host your son in those circumstances. Might it be simpler for your mother to go elsewhere for those two weeks? Do you have any other siblings who could have her to visit for a while? Or does she have friends she could go to?

Some people hire an air BNB apartment for quarantine.

Bear in mind, whatever you do, that he may actually develop corona. In that case it would take more than two weeks until he recovered. Allow for that eventuality and make plans that could continue for more than two weeks if necessary.

amother

Orange

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 7:10 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Are u kidding? So u don’t want to put your mom at risk but u want to send your son somewhere to possibly put someone else at risk g=f? He shouldn’t go to the wedding. Period.

amother

Cyan

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 7:16 pm

or he can go, wear a mask, socially distance, not eat etc...and even then it may be an issue....and he would still have to quarantine after...hatzlocha

unless you know of someone who has an empty apartment for a few weeks who would let you use it there or wherever you are

its challenging

amother

Orange

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 7:36 pm

amother [ Cyan ] wrote:

or he can go, wear a mask, socially distance, not eat etc...and even then it may be an issue....hatzlocha

unless you know of someone who has an empty apartment for a few weeks who would let you use it there or wherever you are

its challenging

Him wearing a mask protects others if he has it.. he needs others to wear a mask to protect him. He should not be allowed any where near the mother if he goes.

amother

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 8:46 pm

amother [ Orange ] wrote:

Are u kidding? So u don’t want to put your mom at risk but u want to send your son somewhere to possibly put someone else at risk g=f? He shouldn’t go to the wedding. Period.

I do not want any of this and would prefer he stay home. But I don't like to tell adult children what to do and this is not only his cousin, its his best friend. Most of the family will be there and he REALLY wants to be there. (And for the imamother who asked, I don't have any siblings in America.) Honestly I can't see how it can work but I was hoping that I missed some obvious solution. I guess not.

amother

Seafoam

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 8:51 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

If he’s an adult, I think you can put the burden on him. Tell him that you understand he wants to go, but he needs to quarantine on return before coming home. He can use some of his own money to rent a place (you can help if you want) or he can figure out another place to stay.

amother

Cyan

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 9:02 pm

I also do not like to tell adult children what to do .

This is different. Your mother (and the rest of you) can not be put at risk. You have to pull rank on this one.

If he can figure out a place to quarantine in isolation safely elsewhere and it meets with your approval then thats another story. Give him the terms conditions and responsibility to find a way to make it work if possible.

Most people in many places in the US are having very limited guests and the rest on zoom.

its tough all around

WhatFor

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 9:53 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I don't see this as telling an adult what to do but as having house rules. Even adults living in your home have to respect the needs of the household. There's an immunocompromised person in the house so he needs to account for that when he makes life decisions.

I agree with those saying that you can just tell him that if he wants to go, he'll have to find another place to stay for a couple of weeks because he cannot be in your house.

amother

Bisque

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 9:58 pm

Why are we jumping on OP? She is trying to find a place for him to quarantine for 2 weeks so he CAN'T pass anything on to anyone. Presumably he is being pretty careful right now at home due to his grandmother and is unlikely to have it himself.

OP, in all likelihood he will have to rent a place for 2 weeks to self-isolate (airBNB or hotel). Plan meals (buy frozen, send him with prepared, or order supplies for him) and entertainment in advance. It may not be fun, but it will enable him to attend the wedding.

amother

Sun, Jul 12 2020, 10:43 pm

amother [ Bisque ] wrote:

Thank you. I appreciate your understanding. The point is that IF he is to go we need a solution that protects anyone over 65 or otherwise vulnerable. If we can't find a solution he won't go. We won't be jeopardizing anyone. And if he goes I have already told him he needs to wear a mask even if he is the only person in the room who does. But he would really hate to miss this. Let's see...

twizzlers1

Mon, Jul 13 2020, 2:47 am

Is it possible for him to stay with somebody else who is going to the wedding anyway? it's his first cousin so it seems like someone from the family would be able to host him obviously they're not worried about going out or catching it.I agree that you absolutely cannot let him into the house for the full 2 weeks after and even longer if he actually catches it. I totally understand that he would want to go to the simcha. I hope that you can find a solution that works.

LovesHashem

Mon, Jul 13 2020, 3:39 am

twizzlers1 wrote:

But what if those people have it? He needs to quarrantine AGAIN after leaving them.

He needs to rent a place alone.

Mama Bear

Mon, Jul 13 2020, 12:05 pm

If you live in Brooklyn there are a number of hachnasas orchim/bikur cholim apartments that are probably empty now bc there are fewer guests.