Neighbor dumping garbage on my porch. Wwyd

amother

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 8:42 pm

My upstairs neighbors’ porch is right above ours but since ours is longer it “catches all their spills”.
I’ve spoken to her and to her kids countless times about it but I might as well have spoken to the wall. It’s like they have satisfaction from seeing their banana peels, iced wrappers, pistachio shells etc etc etc land on our property.
I won’t discuss the part that it attracts bugs and flies and squirrels too, but let’s focus on the manners for now?
What on earth am I still supposed to do if talking got me nowhere?
One of my kids once tried throwing a crumpled snack bag back up to their porch but laws of gravity worked against this ploy.
Any other advice or at least validation would be appreciated! TIA

amother

Slategray

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 8:45 pm

Gather it all up in a garbage bag and leave it at their front door - you can attach a note saying “I believe this is yours” or no note- that should help them get the message
Rinse and repeat

amother

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 8:50 pm

amother [ Slategray ] wrote:

Gather it all up in a garbage bag and leave it at their front door - you can attach a note saying “I believe this is yours” or no note- that should help them get the message
Rinse and repeat

Wouldn’t that be the end of our relationship?

amother

Mustard

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 8:54 pm

I'd tell her and tell the kids.
I remember our downstairs neighbor putting our garbage on our door, most of it was stuff that wasn't ours, brands we don't buy, etc. But if chas vashalom a ball or anything else fell we wouldn't get it back. The relationship has improved since but we always felt we were walking on eggshells when walking past their door. We also thought she must be semi crazy.

crust

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 8:55 pm

How about cigarettes on your awning?
Yes some of them were still burning yes it made a hole.

I have a sil that gets unnerved from a similar situation. The difference between me and her is that we both have the same situation but she gets nervous and I don't.

Blood pressure matters.

amother

Azure

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 8:56 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Pick it up, put it in a bag and go knock on her door or leave it outside her door. Every time. Until she gets the message.

amother

Azure

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 8:56 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Wouldn’t that be the end of our relationship?

Not if her doing it to you isn’t the end of the relationship.

amother

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 8:59 pm

amother [ Mustard ] wrote:

I davka don’t want to be that type neighbor. I do want to keep our relationship intact. And I mentioned in OP that this is after talking to them. They must be the real easygoing type. I’m assuming their floor at home doesn’t look different that my porch after their dumplings.
So the only way to resolve this is by doing something nasty, if talking got me nowhere?

FranticFrummie

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:02 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

If someone has so little disregard for your property and feelings, even after being told repeatedly to stop - what kind of "relationship" are you trying to preserve here?

I wouldn't want to be friends with anyone who would treat me or my property like their own personal garbage dump.

tweety1

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:03 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Yes! Unfortunately. BTDT. Not specifically this but I've had my fair share with horrible neighbors. Sometimes the only language people understand is dirty.

crust

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:05 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Talk to the kids. Give them something small.
It helped to some degree.

(Until the cigarettes came)

amother

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:06 pm

crust wrote:

I have no awning.

But if that would happen to me I’d definitely NOT remain calm. That’s beyond chutzpah already. Am I mechuyev to be rained in on because of their carelessness?
I’m really impressed that you can keep your cool.
Unless if you’re that easygoing type who also does the same to the next neighbor below you?? Wink

crust

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:08 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Lol! Don't think I'm not upset. I just don't have the wahtsitcalled to whatsitcalled because I don't see that my sil should be better off.

I did my hishtadlos and it is what it is.

(At least I helped you with a new word. It's a noun a verb and an adjective)

Last edited by crust on Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:11 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:11 pm

FranticFrummie wrote:

We have a great relationship otherwise.
Cleanliness just isn’t her strong point and automatically it trickled down to her kids.
I can certainly do any of the mean ideas mentioned above, but I have to be ready to practically get into a “fight” which I so badly wanted to avoid.
Plus, I wonder if even then I’ll see a difference.
You can’t exactly rewire a careless/easygoing 30 year old.
This is really tough! And annoying!

teachkids

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:11 pm

The SLIGHTLY less passive aggressive version of the garbage at their door is a gift of an outdoor garbage can since they seem to not have one.

amother

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:12 pm

crust wrote:

Which one is the correct spelling though?

amother

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:13 pm

teachkids wrote:

The SLIGHTLY less passive aggressive version of the garbage at their door is a gift of an outdoor garbage can since they seem to not have one.

Love this idea. For their porch. It’s pretty unusual for people to keep cans on the porch but I think ill consider this! With a cute note attached.

crust

Tue, Jul 14 2020, 9:17 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Love this idea. For their porch. It’s pretty unusual for people to keep cans on the porch but I think ill consider this! With a cute note attached.

It doesnt help when the throwing is an activity.

In my not so humble opinion- Less reaction = less action.