Rethinking Seminary

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Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling

Rethinking Seminary

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amother

Thu, Jul 23 2020, 8:30 pm

We (DD, DH and I) are seriously rethinking wether DD should go this year. She is accepted into a very prestigious "top" BY Seminary. She is interested in the learning but honestly the REAL reason she wanted to go is to spend time with family. We have tons of family there (a few of my siblings, aunts, cousins, grandparent etc...) and she had been planning on spending a lot time with them. Shabbosim, Yom Tov etc...

Now it's coming out that the girls will not be allowed to visit family at all for the foreseeable future. Even after the 2 week quarantine they will be kept as a "self contained group" and will possibly tour together but will not be allowed to go anywhere on their own. In addition to not being able to visit family there will be no spur of the moment trips to the Kotel or geula. No real experience of the land of Israel. Just being locked down in a dorm with a handful of tiyulim.

DD is mourning the idea of a seminary experience that will not exist this year and is afraid she's going to be the ONLY one home.

Are we the only ones having this discussion? Any other mother's seriously rethinking this year?

amother

Maroon

Thu, Jul 23 2020, 8:53 pm

You're not the only one.
However let her speak to her friends and see what they're doing. Maybe amongst them they're thinking about this as well which will make her feel like she's not the only one.
My niece is also probably not going. Too much uncertainty. Many people don't know yet.
They say that this will change the face of Seminary, as it won't be a must to go anymore. And the reason they're saying it is because of this precisely, because people are rethinking it.
Wishing you the guidance you need, to make the right decision for your daughter and your family. And for everyone else for all the decisions out there we need to make in this new uncertain situation.

smss

Thu, Jul 23 2020, 9:55 pm

I can't imagine sending a daughter to seminary under the circumstances.

I have so much sympathy for this year's high school graduates, whatever decision they make, it won't be the year they dreamed of. It's so hard Sad

essie14

Thu, Jul 23 2020, 10:34 pm

I live in Israel and I dont think girls should be coming this year. I suggested that my niece come next summer, maybe with a few friends, and tour and visit family.

amother

Tan

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 1:06 am

I think you all are being shortsighted.
The administrators of the schools have been non stop planning for the new reality.
It promises to be a very special experience!
I would send an emotionally healthy child in a flash

banana123

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 1:14 am

I don't have an answer. No one knows what will be.

It could be that the year will change her life. It could be a huge disappointment of a year.

If she wants to come for the sake of being in Israel, she should come anyways, and be ready to stay in Israel for Pesach (no vacations or trips home from September to June).

That will give her the option, if Israel gets back into a better place, of visiting family when things reopen. It will also allow her to remain after the school year, with one family member or another.

No one knows what will be. The question is where she would rather be: in a seminary at home or working, or in a seminary in Israel. I would vote go to Israel, but without expectations - just with an open mind, that we will see where things go and what will be, everyone is doing their best, and Israel is the best place to be.

I don't think she'll get the same experience anywhere else. And there is potential for a very powerful and life-changing year even - or perhaps because - if she remains in seminary the entire time. (They are planning for trips, because many trips can be done without exposure to others.)

amother

Denim

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 1:25 am

I have heard that there are seminaries opening online for both BY girls as well as the more modern side. I am looking into those as an option.

rivkam

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 1:33 am

I found the year in seminary very important for building a solid foundation going forward into adulthood. This was largely due to the classes. Also the experience of being with all different girls was important. The tiyulim were nice but I dont they added too much to the year. It is a sacrifice to not have the shabbatot going away. I loved meeting other families and seeing how their shabbat. It was also great to see different communities.
It would be a real shame for your daughter to miss out but it also depends on what her high school experience was. I really felt like my high school experience lacked good kodesh education whereas that wasnt the case with other girls who I went to seminary with.

amother

Smokey

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 4:01 am

My daughter's seminary experience was entirely different. But her seminary was far away from the centre of Israel and was much more about the classes and learning and bonding with the other girls. If your daughter wants to visit family she can always stay on after seminary and do so.

amother

Honeydew

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 5:06 am

This is a hard call. Are there any chutz l'aretz sems that could still be an option? I've heard good things about Rebbetzin Assaf's seminary. (Others are good too, but that would be where I'd be looking if I had a daughter in the parasha.)

amother

Tangerine

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 5:27 am

OP it wasnt that long ago that it was my seminary year...and without having Corona as a factor I chose not to go. Being that I was a straight A model BY student, this upset some of my teachers and principals but I had my reasons.
I really felt like I had a very solid hashkafa. I didnt need to find myself anymore.
I wanted to get a start on real life already.
I wasnt so interested in real hardcore learning anymore, as much as I was interested in tiyulim and the land of Israel experience. For that, I reasoned, I can go on a shorter camp type trip.

So I started nursing school and went to local shiurim. Not because I "had to" as part of a curriciulum, but because I wanted to, for my own ruchniyus growth. And it was a wonderful, beautiful experience. It trained me to keep my spiritual growth going even when theres no teachers to tell me to.

I got engaged the next year BH to a wonderful learning boy who was thrilled that I had just gotten my degree-no support for us, I BH supported us through kollel.

I had no issues with shidduchim BH, no sem wasnt a problem at all.

It worked out great. Not such a big deal not to go

shabbatiscoming

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 5:35 am

amother [ Smokey ] wrote:

Not sure what you think changes after she is in sem. People are not inviting people over right now. I mean, im sure there are sone, but overall inviting people over is not veing done just yet.

banana123

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 5:37 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

Not sure what you think changes after she is in sem. People are not inviting people over right now. I mean, im sure there are sone, but overall inviting people over is not veing done just yet.

Between now and June, a lot of water will flow down the Jordan River....

shabbatiscoming

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 5:46 am

banana123 wrote:

Between now and June, a lot of water will flow down the Jordan River....

huh??

1ofbillions

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 5:51 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

huh??

She means - a lot can change between now and June, and you never know.

banana123

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 5:54 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

huh??

עד אז הרבה מים יזרמו בנהר הירדן

לא שמעת את הפתגם הזה? Smile

shabbatiscoming

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 5:57 am

banana123 wrote:

עד אז הרבה מים יזרמו בנהר הירדן

לא שמעת את הפתגם הזה? Smile

nope, never heard this befire.
But I got it now Smile

banana123

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 5:59 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

nope, never heard this befire.
But I got it now Smile

Put the triangular blue badge with the picture of the river flowing down, over a clock, onto your shirt. Tongue Out

shabbatiscoming

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 6:00 am

banana123 wrote:

Put the triangular blue badge with the picture of the river flowing down, over a clock, onto your shirt. Tongue Out

amother

Sienna

Fri, Jul 24 2020, 6:45 am

Question: have the seminaries said anything about Yom Tov?
I'm assuming that all the girls would have to stay and eat in the dorm, right?

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